The Cheerful Oncologist

Things Overheard, Part II

Things Overheard in a Plastic Surgeon’s Office:

1. “Doc, can you at least bring me down to an A-cup?”

2. “Yes, I’m pleased, but why does my husband keep asking me if I’m ready for my close-up?”

3. “I’m afraid I made this one longer than the other.”

4. “We perform laser removal here, Mr. Talbot – not miracles.”

5. “You have four sisters just like you? Well, I suppose I could take a look at them…”

6. “Now, then, Mr. Jones, if you’ll just take off your fur coat…”

7. “Are you sure you want a reduction? It might affect your career, you know.”

8. “Please – no more. I can’t take it! You’ve got to get yourself another surgeon.”

9. “Yes, Ma’am, I understand you want a tummy tuck, but first, there are some nice men out here who want to meet you.”

10. “Hey, what can I say? You f***ed up – you trusted us! Hey, make the best of it!”