Here’s a little post-Thanksgiving quiz for the gang to take – try guessing the correct answers regarding this research study from the University of California, San Diego. I’ll even make this multiple choice…
“Previous studies have suggested that _____________ increases pain,” [said] lead investigator Dr. Mark Wallace.
A. standing while riding “Space Mountain” at Walt Disney World
B. being cruel to be kind
C. suppressing the urge to unleash a salvo of flatulence during the homily of a family wedding
D. smuggling potatoes through customs
“This is the first study using a dose-response method that suggests _____________ has a therapeutic window with moderate doses decreasing pain and high doses increasing pain.”
A. singing “Bridge Over Troubled Waters”
B. asking your sister to “pull my finger”
C. a Philly cheese steak sandwich
D. chainsaw aerobics
In a group of healthy volunteers, Wallace and colleagues studied the effect of low, medium and high doses of ____________ or placebo on pain induced by injecting capsaicin into the forearm 5 and 45 minutes after exposure…
A. pillow talk
B. yelling “hubba-hubba” outside a police station
C. Don Rickles
D. Armour Pork Brains in Milk Gravy
No dose of ____________ had any effect at 5 minutes, but by 45 minutes after exposure there was a significant decrease in pain with the medium dose and a significant increase in pain with the high dose.
A. “99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall”
C. moustache wax
D. Hugo Chavez’s undershirts
Despite their findings, the researchers emphasize that no conclusions on the pain-relieving efficacy of ________________ can be made from this study. Further study is needed, they conclude.
Give Up? The answers are below the fold…
The correct response for every blank in these quotes is “marijuana.”
We’ve all heard this phrase before, but something in authors’ tone reveals an awe-inspiring commitment to the advancement of health care when they state: