World's Fair



  1. #1 chezjake
    February 10, 2007

    Another truth: Truth is stranger than fiction.

  2. #2 Bee Zarr
    February 10, 2007

    More paprika often helps.

    Or try a smidge of cocoa. But not until later in the boil.

  3. #3 lmnop
    February 11, 2007

    Myabe dropping your back elbow a little more will help. Hold it tighter against your ribs. I know, that’s a pretty typical suggestion, but my average went up by 30 points in the ’04 season, just from that alone.

  4. #4 John McKay
    February 12, 2007

    There really should be a badge for blowing things up and/or sodium hi-jinx.

  5. #5 Anthony K.
    February 12, 2007

    The “MacGyver” badge.
    … clever use of a paper clip and DW40. …

    DW40? That’s just embarrassing. Surely you mean WD-40.

  6. #6 No One of Consequence
    February 12, 2007

    * Have an equation/curve named after you badge.
    * Provided scientific proof concerning the FSM badge.

  7. #7 Billy
    February 12, 2007

    How about a “Banned from Uncommon Descent” (or more generally a “Banned from Quack Convention”) badge?

  8. #8 David Ng
    February 12, 2007

    Thanks for the DW40 typo. Have changed it already.

  9. #9 TheBlackCat
    February 12, 2007

    “I have handled live internal organs” badge
    Like the human internal organs badge, but the organs have to have still been alive when you handled them (as in measurable cellular activity in a significant number of the cells in the organ). Organs don’t have to be human.

    3 levels of laser badge. The first for using them (includes laser pointers), the second for using them in your research/communication (except laser pointers), and the third for burning stuff/cutting stuff/initiating nuclear fusion with lasers.

    A badge for having to wear protective gear in your research.

    A badge for working with poisons.

    A badge for working with brains, either human or animal.

    A badge for using microscopes and another for using telescopes.

    A badge for injuries acquired while practicing or publicizing science.

    A badge for people where at least 50% of their scientific work is done on computers.

  10. #10 Steinn Sigurdsson
    February 12, 2007

    Astro badges:

    I – have used a telescope

    II – have got time on a professional telescope

    III – got time on a space telescope

  11. #11 Julie Stahlhut
    February 12, 2007

    Here’s a badge suggestion:

    Image: A pedigree chart with at least one breeding pair connected by double lines.

    Meaning: “I have deliberately caused my research organisms to inbreed or self-pollinate.”

  12. #12 darrell
    February 12, 2007

    How about badges for us anthro geeks?

    – “I have handled a child’s skeleton on more than one occasion”
    – “I have a complete human skeleton somewhere in my place of residence”
    – “I am better with dead people than live people”
    – “I drink wine in the lab late at night”
    – “I swing both ways…I’m transdisciplinary”

  13. #13 Nick Gully
    February 12, 2007

    Time Dilation badge. (clock in motion icon?)
    Statistical Linear Regression Badge (Data handling I)
    High Voltage badge.

  14. #14 Mike Fox
    February 12, 2007

    How about a badge for having intentionally put something in your mouth, in the name of science, that was later decided to be a bad idea. What comes to my mind is mouth pipetting or maybe a surgeon used his mouth as a clamp or something.

    I’d also be cool to see “science has forced me to go to the hospital” themed badge.

    This post was an absolute delight. Thank you for your time and effort.

    Mike Fox

  15. #15 markus
    February 12, 2007

    seconding darrell’s suggestion for the ‘transdisciplinary’ badge.

    design: venn diagrams?

  16. #16 evilchemistry
    February 12, 2007

    Published sequence of a microorganism badge.

    Native protein purification and biochemical characterization badge

    The “has frozen stuff just to see what happens” badge (LEVEL IV) Liquid helium

  17. #17 John McKay
    February 12, 2007

    Have had a disease or syndrome named after me.

    There should be two seperate levels this one. Level I – as the discoverer. Level II – as the index case.

  18. #18 tikistitch
    February 12, 2007

    Something along the lines of “by virtue of discussing labwork at lunchtime, we have successfuly emptied all surrounding tables at the restaurant.”

  19. #19 David Ng
    February 12, 2007

    These are great. Keep ’em coming. Will do a big update sometime next week.

  20. #20 llewelly
    February 12, 2007

    I am not a scientist, but, observing that certain infectious diseases are carried rectally, I think there should be a badge for violating the posterior of an animal in the name of science.
    Also, I was wondering if there should be a badge for having played with elemental mercury as a small child (I was horrified, later, to discover that I had handled something with such frightening reputation…)

  21. #21 Mike Huben
    February 12, 2007

    A few that I need:

    Chased through the jungle by soldiers in a helicopter.

    Bitten by a large, undomesticated carnivore.

    Accidental generation and inhalation of poison gas.

    Spent own money on scientific expedition.

    Scientific publications with only a high school diploma.

    Worlds foremost expert on an obscure subject due to death of predecessor.

    Persuades laymen to handle frightening creatures.

    Bat fluffer.

    Homebrew low-tech equipment.

    Research procrastination.

  22. #22 Julianne
    February 12, 2007

    “Willing to publicly humiliate oneself to demonstrate a scientific point”

    “Has written scientific papers while drunk”

  23. #23 chezjake
    February 12, 2007

    Ah, so you wanted badge suggestions. 😉

    I’d qualify for all of the following:
    – Alchemy badge – have used scientific knowledge to brew golden alcoholic beverages
    – Hypodermic badge – know how to give/have given IV drugs to a mouse
    – Drugz badge – have administered multiple psychoactive drugs to multiple species of lab animals.
    – Brain surgery badge – have implanted electrodes in brains of multiple species of lab animals, thus incidentally also qualifying for the dental drill badge.
    – Blowhard badge – have designed and blown custom laboratory glassware in order to carry out experiments on isolated frog hearts (did this in both high school and college)
    – Microsurgery badge – have done limb bud transplants on chick and frog embryos and produced viable animals with extra limbs
    – Daredevil badge – have picked up wild poisonous snakes without gloves and brought them home
    – Better part of Valor badge – had free access to a 1 kg bottle of pure Sandoz LSD-25 and did not avail myself of any.

  24. #24 chezjake
    February 12, 2007

    Afterthought: You ought to modify the name of the organization to the *World* Order Of The Science Scouts Of Exemplary Repute And Above Average Physique. This would allow the top of your badge to proclaim WOOT! 😉

  25. #25 damian
    February 12, 2007

    I think there must be a category for death in the name of Science.

    – I killed for science …
    – possibly with levels/degrees/taxae

    I (only?) killed mice – but I remember it pretty darn well.

  26. #26 pcthug
    February 13, 2007

    Id like to suggest
    “scourge of Creationism badge”
    too controversial?

  27. #27 Christopher Woulfe
    February 13, 2007

    How about a Level IV badge for people who have shocked themselves and another person at the same time – with a distinguishing “bar” for three phase or other very high voltages.

    Since this badge (and a few others) may remove you (and another person) from the gene pool when you attempt to qualify, a link to the Darwin Awards may be in order.

    The “has worked with exploding penguins” category has also, sadly, been overlooked again.

    Just one more buzz … Christopher Woulfe

  28. #28 Angiportus
    February 13, 2007

    “Made things get red-hot that usually don’t”

  29. #29 Julie
    February 13, 2007

    I have a suggestions for a couple of badges.
    –I cut up flipper badge for anyone that has hacked up any marine mammal.
    I–poked a dead marine mammal with a stick
    II–performed one or more necropsies of a marine mammal
    III–can dismantle an entire marine mammal using a normark falcon filet knife with in sheath sharpener
    –I have eaten my research organism badge.
    –Smelly research badge At the end or during the course of research you smell bad enough to evoke comment in a public place or even clear a halo of space around you.

  30. #30 Julie
    February 13, 2007

    Other badges
    –I have tethered and or caged research organisms
    –I have introduced predators in the name of science
    –The Jim to Marlin Perkins badge for grad students who have performed somewhat perilous if not rediculous tasks at the request of their advisor
    –smuggled samples through customs badge

  31. #31 dbpitt
    February 13, 2007

    “Raised a botfly to maturity in his/her own skin”

  32. #32 Heidi
    February 13, 2007

    Some more suggestions:

    Works with feces

    Has caused an (unintended) lab explosion

    Prowess with a pipette

    Has taken rumen fluid from a cannulated cow.

  33. #33 Joanne
    February 13, 2007

    As a follow up to The “worship me – I’ve published in Nature or Science” badge, how about The “worship me for real – I’ve published in an Open Access journal” badge.

    Also, a “I have a life” badge might be nice (i.e., highlighting the reality that it is possible to combine a passion for science with other weirdo hobbies such as family, the outdoors, or playing checkers).

  34. #34 marc
    February 13, 2007

    For the weather types (and meteorological badge design suggestion):

    Level I – I’ve been paid to observe the weather (Cu cloud with a dollar sign)
    Level II – I’ve accurately forecasted severe weather not stongly supported by data (lightning bolt hitting kite)
    Level III – I’ve been in severe weather for work related purposes (figure with microphone in front of a twister)

  35. #35 sciencewoman
    February 13, 2007

    These are great!
    a few that I’ll suggest (and admit to):
    – “I’ve forgone bathing for a month to do remote field work” badge (higher levels might also be possible)
    – “My scientific equipment caused a headache for Homeland Security (or TSA or customs…)” badge

  36. #36 Laura
    February 14, 2007

    My friends and I would really, really love it if you could add a “works with acid” badge.

  37. #37 bioephemera
    February 14, 2007

    – presently has more than one item of roadkill in home freezer (for dissection, not consumption).

    – has concealed live animals on one’s person while flying a commercial airline (like what Julie said, but the specimen has to be alive – preferably wiggly and/or smelly).

    – has accidentally mutated a houseplant with unshielded radiation or chemical mutagens. (Said houseplant must have grossly aberrant morphology to qualify).

    – second on tikistitch’s suggestion (has committed biology-related lunchtime conversational offense).

    – second on the Drugz badge.

    – has driven an entire dead human body around in a civilian vehicle (for scientific purposes, of course).

  38. #38 Rebecca
    February 15, 2007

    For those of us in the clinical side of things, how about:

    The “I have spilled infectious bodily fluids all over myself and survived” badge.

  39. #39 Jenn
    February 16, 2007

    How about a “I’ve named a pet (or child) after a scientific person or thing” badge?

  40. #40 Roger
    February 16, 2007

    Something for nobel prize winners. A martini glass, maybe, to indicate that they drink for free in all geek-owned bars.

    Something for people who work with vacuum chambers and clean rooms.

  41. #41 Bervin
    February 16, 2007

    The “I can tell you all about behavior in more than three dimensions, and intend to” badge.

  42. #42 Angelique Bone
    February 16, 2007

    Well you definitely need the 3 levels of “I set something on fire just to see what happened”, not to be confused with the one covering the mastery of fire in a laborotory setting, for this one is meant for spontaneous activity.

    A glowing pickle badge would be neat, for those of us that have successfully made a dill pickle light up

    Food science badges in general would be awesome, as that’s where I concentrate most of my scientific effort, after all, cooking is edible science!

  43. #43 Beth
    February 16, 2007

    I second the motion of adding the word “World” at the start of the Order’s name. WOOT!!

    And my suggestion for a badge: “I got lab animals drunk in the name of science.”

  44. #44 Picasso1387
    February 16, 2007

    The “stuff in my home would probably be considered bomb-making materials by the police” badge
    The “I’ll gladly talk your ear off about my obscure field of study” badge
    The “I get paid to break things” badge
    The “my advanced degrees make me better than you” badge
    The “Top Seekrit” badge – for science activities you’re not allowed to tell your wife about.
    I second the call for an acids badge – with a higher level for dissolving glass in HF.

  45. #45 Michael Edelman
    February 16, 2007

    A few I could proudly wear:

    – Has chased an experimental animal down a hallway
    – Was seen on TV twisting dials that had nothing to do with the actual research being described.

    I like the “has named an animal” suggestion. I once had a colony of eight chinchillas in a laboratory all named for friends and colleagues. Perhaps chevrons could be displayed indicating the number of animals.

  46. #46 rotangus
    February 16, 2007

    Robotics I – I have created a remote controlled robot.

    Robotics II – I have created a semi-autonomous robot.

    Robotics III – I have created a fully autonomous robot.

    Robotics IV – I have survived.

  47. #47 David Good
    February 16, 2007

    How about aviation related:

    a pair of aviator wings;
    level 1: science done in flight
    level 2: science done in flight, above .5 mach number
    level 3: science done in flight, above .85 mach number
    level 4: science done in flight, above mach 1

    How about computer related:

    a badge with the 01 (on off) symbol:
    level 1: built my own computer
    level 2: built my own network
    level 3: built my own network, and has a free wifi node
    level 4: “hacked a gibson”

    How about reproductive science:

    a badge with the figures of 2 children

    level 1: successfully reproduced once
    level 2: successfully reproduced twice
    level 3: successfully reproduced more than twice

  48. #48 meffl
    February 16, 2007

    How about the “has lost one of the five senses” badge…

    The “can no longer explain to parents what you do for a living” badge

    The “been stopped by security at an airport” badge

    The “gave up on sci-fi as there is too much fiction” badge

    The “uses Kimwipes for tissues” badge

  49. #49 Astroprof
    February 16, 2007

    I’d extend Steinn’s astrobadges.
    Perhaps Level Ia: I’ve used a telescope to observe a planet.
    Level Ib: I’ve used a telescope to observe a galaxy.
    Combined Level Iab: I’ve done both.

    Then, add “I’ve worded with a vacuum” other than a vacuum cleaner, that is.

    Extend David’s Aviator badges with Astronaut badges:
    Level I: I’ve used a spacecraft simulator.
    Level II: I’ve been aboard a spacecraft.
    Level III: I’ve actually been in space.

  50. #50 meffl
    February 16, 2007

    > The “can no longer explain to parents what you do for a living” badge

    Just thought there should be levels, with a “can no longer explain to other scientists…” and the “can no longer explain to co-workers…” badges available.

  51. #51 QuantumTroll
    February 16, 2007

    There’s a dearth of computing sciences badges. Every science these days uses supercomputers, so this badge could be put in cereal boxes, or in a tray in the cafeteria.

    The “Used more FLOPs today than ordinary mortals use their entire lives” badge? Image: a line of boxes standing on a tile floor.

  52. #52 parktownprawn
    February 16, 2007

    The “Broken Heart for Science Promotion Badge”

    The recipient has to have been dumped because their significant other mistook their passionate explanation of a scientific principle to someone else for another kind of passion. (not that i’m bitter about this but i still think the Leidenfrost effect *is* really cool)

  53. #53 Jeff
    February 16, 2007

    “I may look like a scientist but I’m actually also a pirate”:

    Just so you don’t leave the other side out. Otherwise, how are we to hold Ninja -vs- Pirate parties in proper style?

    Also: here’s some proposed images for the acid badges:

  54. #54 Jeff
    February 16, 2007

    Ooh, the clean room suggestion just made me think of one:

    “I’ve graffitied swear words in a 10nm font”

    For the nanotechnologists out there.

  55. #55 robyn
    February 16, 2007

    The Linnaeus Badge

    Level I (written): I can confidently apply the nominative plural and genitive plural forms of Latin nouns to written taxonomic descriptions

    Level II (oral): I incorporate Latin species names into my everyday conversations with no apparent difficulty in pronunciation. In fact, I prefer to use Latin names over common names.

  56. #56 Frank DeRosa
    February 16, 2007

    I suggest a level above “I know what a tadpole is”, that being “I have created many, many tadpoles and raised them to maturity,” or something similar. Perhaps a wide, squared off version, like the Nature/Science badge.

    A badge for holding a scientific patent, for something silly or otherwise. Also a badge for refusing to patent something.

    For the computer nerds (and others), an “FOSS” badge for creating software and then releasing it for free and open source.

    A badge for those who “handle” virii.

    A “Genesmith” badge for those who manipulate proteins, DNA, or RNA on a regular, perhaps weekly, basis.

    Lab animal rancher – you are responsible for a colony of 50 or more animals.

    I second the pipette proficiency badge.

    Finally, for the astronomers/cosmologists, a badge for naming a celestial body or event, as well as for having one named for you.

  57. #57 Larry
    February 16, 2007

    Homeland Security Badges:
    I – Have legally performed experiments that otherwise would have been illegal
    II – Have performed experiments whose subject/materials/methods were made illegal due to my findings
    III – Have performed experiments that I am now obligated to deny any knowledge of

  58. #58 Sunfell
    February 16, 2007

    Here are some merit badges for you. I think that I earned some of them myself.

    Listening to crackpots espouse their personal scientific theories without throttling them.

    Listening to religious believers trash science without throttling them.

    Listening to people misuse the word “theory” without throttling them.

    Lighting a barbeque with liquid oxygen.

    Roasting hot dogs or chickens in a microwave radio beam.

    Accidentally jamming a local FM radio station while playing with your microwave radio test equipment.

    Used your consolidated tool kit as a musical instrument.

    Correcting incorrect equations (like the one in the background in Wierd Al’s “White and Nerdy”) on TV shows, videos and movies.

  59. #59 jon
    February 16, 2007

    The “I’ve used ridiculously dangerous chemicals to perform a mundane task” badge
    The “acid burn” badge. Level I for weak acids, level II for strong acids, level III for superacids
    The “ultracentrifuge” badge for knowing how to use one properly
    The “I laugh in the face of cancer” badge for cancer research, or for handling carcinogenic chemicals. Bonus stripes for both
    The “I know more elements than people” badge

  60. #60 Sarah P
    February 16, 2007


    I’m a science-oriented Librarian, maybe a badge for us Librarians, like:

    the “I’ve explained simple scientific principles to people who are incapable of understanding”
    the”I’ve attempted to explain scientific principles to people who don’t care”
    the “I’ve used scientific principles and definitions to outsmart unsuspecting patrons”
    The “I’ve used books as weapons” for the fed-up librarian ready to go postal
    The “I know more than you do” the ultimate librarian slogan

  61. #61 Jenn
    February 16, 2007

    Another suggestion:

    A “Was it supposed to do that?” badge.

    Of course, you can have different levels depending on if what “it” did turned out to be a good thing or not.

  62. #62 J-Dog
    February 16, 2007

    More Anthro Badges:

    I have dug up human bones in the rain (Sign Of The Anthro Trowel / dental Pick under a Storm Cloud – Or maybe, rain dripping off a nose…)

    I have blazed trail to Get To The Site (Trowel with Machete)

    I have worked All Night (OpenRed-Eye)

  63. #63 J-Dog
    February 16, 2007

    Hey Sarah P – My first job was working as a page in the library… You need a badge for “Getting High On Library Paste!” BTW – Your Library Badge is soooo easy! Got to be a finger in front of the lips!

  64. #64 Jon
    February 16, 2007

    Also for the people who work with unpleasant chemicals the “I wash my hands before I go to the bathroom” badge

  65. #65 Mike Huben
    February 16, 2007

    The naming organisms badge needs to be made more specific.

    “An organism was named after me.”
    “I named an organism after somebody else.”

    Level 0: an individual organism.
    Level 1: a species.
    Level 2: a genus.
    Level 3: a family.
    Level 4: you’re lying….

  66. #66 Gexx
    February 16, 2007

    more badges:

    Placed something in mouth badge: for individuals whose research involves placing objects in the mouth (whether or not it is advised). Object placed in mouth should be one not generally eaten by the public (ie: mouth pipetting, ceramic testing).

    Protective equipment badge level I : A job which requires protective equipment covering <50% of your surface

    Protective equipment badge level II: A job which requires protective equipment covering 50

  67. #67 gexx
    February 16, 2007

    one more:


    I have returned from field work and was directed to the homeless shelter while unloading my vehicle


  68. #68 FarMcKon
    February 16, 2007

    Bitten By Science I
    In which the recipient has been bitten by something smaller than their own thumb, in the pursuit of science

    Bitten By Science II
    In which the recipient has been bitten by something larger than their own thumb, but still less than their own size in the pursuit of science.

    Bitten By Science III
    In which the recipient has been bitten by something larger than their own size in the pursuit of science.

    Bitten By Science IV (posthumous)
    In which the recipient has died as a result of a bite that was received in the pursuit of science.

  69. #69 Aviatrix
    February 16, 2007

    I would like to nominate Ryan North for the society. His Dinosaur Comics include discussion of such topics as computational linguistics , evolution , completely gratuitous cephalopod references , vitamin B12 and stomping.

    And note his stand on space exploration and sexual equality exemplified by this t-shirt. I’m sure many of your members would be interested in the shirt independent of Ryan’s qualifications.
    (Seeing as there is a badge for science in music, there should be one for science in popular art).

    I don’t blog about science enough to qualify, but one of my readers sent me your URL.

  70. #70 Aviatrix
    February 16, 2007

    “The recipient has to have been dumped because their significant other mistook their passionate explanation of a scientific principle to someone else for another kind of passion.”

    Ha ha. I once woke someone up to show him weather map depictions of an amazingly concentric and deep low forming off the coast. I’ll never live that down.

  71. #71 jack robert
    February 16, 2007

    Well, just to keep in line with “every little thing that Scouting entails…..just an regular, ole Eagle Scout, so that any scouting questions that might come up, be answered with some degree of orginality…

    PS With a resoruces in 105 true merit badges from the Boy Scouts of America…

  72. #72 JYB
    February 16, 2007

    Garage Scientist Badge!

    “Being watched by Homeland Security for experiments I perform in my garage.”

  73. #73 David Gore
    February 17, 2007

    Ok, I’m mildly surprised there’s no “rocket scientist” badge. There could be multiple of levels:

    1) Have successfully exploded a model rocket
    2) Have successfully launched a model rocket
    3) Have successfully launched a NON-model rocket (sounding rocket, satellite, probe, etc.)
    4) Work for NASA/ESA/equivalent.


  74. #74 Denny Rolle
    February 17, 2007

    Highest Praise badge:
    (I)Plagiarized by a student.
    (II)Plagiarized by a colleague.
    (III)Plagiarized by a Nobel laureate.

    Omega Point badge:
    (I)Ever had a profound insight during orgasm.
    (II)Ever gave someone else a profound insight during their orgasm.

    Diablo badge:
    Have gotten a colleague to agree with complete nonsense just to show they’re incompetent.

  75. #75 Rob
    February 17, 2007

    For the rockets — multiple levels are needed:

    Rocketry badge (Note: All flights must be successful)

    0: Estes rockets (Centuri or Quest rockers available)
    1: High Power Rocketry Level 1
    2: High Power Rocketry Level 2
    3: High Power Rocketry Level 3
    4: Had to get special FAA and NASA permission to launch
    5: List of nations that have reached space includes your name (way to go, Ky Michaelson!)
    6. Launched Humans (legally?)
    7. Flew on a rocket

    Other possible badges:

    “Got a grade of ‘No Comment’ on paper or class project, paper or class project was not returned, and you were forced to turn in all copies of research, notes, drafts, etc.”

    “Designed nuclear reactors” (That one’s for my wife).

    “Met significant other at science event or lecture” (I met my wife over a discussion of dynamite at a science lecture while in high school.)

    Special “Mythbuster Badge” for the folks on the TV show. (Donating your Corvette to be destroyed counts.)

  76. #76 Bill the builder
    February 17, 2007

    How about the
    “Designed worlds first steel hyperbolic parabaloid house” badge?

    I’d like to sow that one on my shirt.

  77. #77 Aileen
    February 18, 2007

    I second at least half of these suggestions, but here are some that haven’t been touched on:

    “Erdős-Bacon number of 4 or less” – Could easily be made into multiple tiers.

    “Polyglot” – for having explained scientific concepts to laypersons in more than one language (special props for using “math” as the language, but programming languages don’t count).

    “Wikipedian” or “Wikipeida Nazi” – for those who can’t help but correct wikipedia for the sake of the greater human understanding of science. A conflicting badge could be “Wikipedia forger” for fake entries.

    “has been Wiki’d” – there exists a legitimate Wikipedia entry about you, owing to your contributions to science.

    “Museum collections curator” – for those who have catalogued, labeled, and organized thousands of specimens. Could have a field collector extention, a la “I have smuggled specimens through customs.”

    “Autoclave proficient”

    “Stupid party tricks” – has entertained an audience of more than 15 people by applying a scientific principle and using common household supplies and appliances. Special recognition for making money by betting on the outcome of said said trick.

    “makes science fun”
    Level I – has played games that require altogether too much scientific knowledge – e.g. making words and sentences using solely element abbreviations (Barium disodium is BaNa2 is BaNaNa) or naming a reptile genus that begins with every letter of the alphabet
    Level II – has created such a game
    Level III – writes physics engines

    “Editor of a scientific journal” – icon could be a plume pen.

    Picky detail: if you use the chezjake’s suggestion, remember that snakes (and spiders and wasps, etc.) are venomous, not poisonous (yes, I do brandish a science prick badge…).

  78. #78 Aileen
    February 18, 2007

    Also, how about a “Globetrotter” badge for having conducted or presented research on three or more continents?

  79. #79 Nimish Batra
    February 18, 2007

    Rock Music + Ear!
    Listens to music with Sciency lyrics… Ever listen to Radiohead?
    “Karma police, arrest this man, he talks in maths
    He buzzes like a fridge, hes like a detuned radio”
    [there’s many other songs too, that’d qualify.]

    Oh, oh…

    DNA Fan – fan of Douglas Adams’ work?
    HHGG Fan – The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.

  80. #80 maggie s
    February 18, 2007

    Check out my email

  81. #81 Helen
    February 19, 2007

    Soldering mishaps badges:

    Level 1: Have burned self soldering.

    Level 2: Have set hair on fire while soldering.

    Level 3: Have set hair on fire while soldering 10 times or more.

  82. #82 Helen
    February 19, 2007

    Also need a “I’ve had one hell of a time talking my equipment through airport security” badge and a “I’ve had one hell of a time talking my equipment through customs” badge.

  83. #83 Helen
    February 19, 2007

    Forgot level three on that last one: “I went ahead and smuggled my equipment since it was the only way to get it through.”

  84. #84 rawright
    February 19, 2007

    Rocketry badges:

    Level I – Made my own rocket
    Level II – Made my own rocket fuel
    Level III – Launched a neighbor’s pet in my rocket

    Electrical Acheivement:

    Level I – Safely changed a breaker bare-handed
    Level II – Walked unscathed in a power substation
    Level III – Operated a 230kV breaker without needing a change of underwear


    Level I – Taught children to make fireworks
    Level II – Manufactured nitroglycerin in the garage
    Level III – Blew up the high school chem lab

  85. #85 Sean S
    February 19, 2007

    love this page.. one or two additions:

    Soldering – have dropped hot iron in crotch…
    Electric Shock – have intentionally subjected self to electric shock for fun, while involved in otherwise worthy scientific pursuits, extra points for > 5KV (low power I hope)

    Also, along with the Security sections (it probably should be a separate section for working with classified projects) –
    have worked on projects i wasn’t allowed to know the purpose of.

  86. #86 Christian
    February 19, 2007

    I suggest a Level IV “experienced with electrical shock” badge for those of us who have BEEN shocked by an organism for science. (Torpedo ray, electrophorus, etc…)

  87. #87 Thermochronic
    February 19, 2007

    A badge for dumpster diving science, successfully using lab equipment scavenged from a dumpster, bonus if the resulting data was used in a thesis and/or published

  88. #88 Rob
    February 20, 2007

    I forgot: how about a “mentoring” badge?

    I gave the next door kid an extra oscilloscope I had lying around, and he shocked himself and almost burned down his house.

    Strange thing about mentoring — everyone learns. He learned the power of electricity and I learned a) why the oscilloscope had been available at the ham fest for so little and b) mentoring might involve more than just handing someone something and hoping they don’t kill themselves with it.

  89. #89 John McKay
    February 20, 2007

    The “I’ve set fire to stuff” badge (LEVEL IV).

    In which the recipient has set fire to his or herself while performing experiments in the name of science. Cooking or drinking accidents do not qualify one for this badge.

  90. #90 David Ng
    February 20, 2007

    Oh yeah, Fire level IV. That’s a good one. Will work on more when I get a chance. (I’m about a third of the way through this great list)

  91. #91 Agnes
    February 20, 2007

    How about an Economic Reality badge: “uses equipment that costs more than what he/she will make over a lifetime”.

  92. #92 Julie Stahlhut
    February 20, 2007

    Here are two I’d love to have:

    * I am married to or domestically partnered with another scientist. (Two linked Valentine hearts lit aflame with Bunsen burner.)

    * I have been bitten and stung by invertebrates while doing science. (In my case, mostly wasps and ants, but an inclusive badge would have a stinging hymenopteran, a biting arachnid or chilopod, and a mean-looking cnidarian on it).

    Actually, there should be a whole slew of “I’ve been bitten/stung/clawed/mauled by ….” badges — maybe even one with a poison ivy cluster on it for the botanists and field ecologists among us!

  93. #93 Turil
    February 20, 2007

    How about a set for being highly successful? Like:

    Making a Better World I – I’ve invented/discovered something that improved my life.

    Making a Better World II – I’ve invented/discovered something that improved someone else’s life.

    Making a Better World III – I’ve invented/discovered something that would improve the lives of every single Earthling

  94. #94 Zod
    February 21, 2007

    Surviving one’s own chemical explosions

    I The shrapnel always blew the other way when you were a child – so you still have all your body parts attached.
    II Your guardian angel is wounded or gone – the shrapnel *can’t* have all blown the other way from that explosion in a confined space.

  95. #95 Zod
    February 21, 2007

    Big Stink I – ever emptied out a lab or building with the odors of an experiment.
    Big Stink II – As I, but failed to notice the odor yourself.
    Big Stink III – Inhaled a cloud of your own making consisting of any chemical ever used in chemical warfare.

  96. #96 gexx
    February 21, 2007

    Along with the surviving venom/poison/bites/trampling/mauling badges, how about an:
    I’ve discovered I’m *not* allergic to something the scary way, for those of us who have been ignorant. I’ve done fieldwork not knowing what poison ivy looked like until I was informed of it while eating my lunch sandwich and laying in a patch of said plant.

  97. #97 pelican
    February 21, 2007

    I love the two hearts with the bunsen burner, also the badges for Level 1: naming a syndrome/illness, and Level 2: for becoming the index case. I’d add some neuroscience imaging:
    Level 1: spent more than 10 hours in the scanner
    Level 2: spent more than 100 hours in the scanner
    Level 3: can no longer sleep unless in the scanner with a sequence running

  98. #98 rowena
    February 21, 2007

    “I have named a gene for a pop culture reference”

  99. #99 rowena
    February 21, 2007

    shorted out half of lab with small metal object (eg needle)

  100. #100 Thermochronic
    February 22, 2007

    What about the Human Guinea Pig badge, for those of us who have lent our bodies to science, even if it was because we were grad students and needed the $350.

  101. #101 Diane
    February 22, 2007

    How about one for those of us who think plants are more interesting than animals, and have spent countless hours trying to convince the animalcentrists of that fact?

    Also one for people who have sequenced their pets, houseplants, or selves, just for the hell of it.

  102. #102 Diane
    February 22, 2007

    and also: I have at least 15 different colors of Sharpie
    and: I can write a legible paragraph of valuable information on the lid of a 1.5-mL microcentrifuge tube

  103. #103 Gary
    February 22, 2007

    Protein Purification Badge
    Mass Spec. Badge
    UV/VIs spectrometer expert Badge
    Lab Idiot Badge
    Lab Poser Badge
    Stupid Question Badge Levels 1 – 3
    Stupid Mistake Badge
    Took credit for someones elses idea badge
    Brownnose the boss badge
    Pulled an overnighter in the lab badge
    Will do anything for coffee badge

  104. #104 gexx
    February 22, 2007

    Bar Tab badges – they can be in levels, but each event should include some professional aspect (interview, conference, etc) and the level should be based total with a minimum average per head. Also – it must be paid with PERSONAL funds. No corporate funding allowed. AND this is before the tip. If you ever do NOT leave a tip, this gets taken away ;-).
    ie: Bartab level 1: $50+ bartab with $10+ person could work for 2 people drinking $25/each or 7 people drinking $10/each (even though $70 is the total.

    and of course:
    Bartab honerarium: $1000+ with no minimum per head (by that point, the point is moot)

    I’m ambivilent as to weather Canadian or US dollars are used.

  105. #105 Kat
    February 23, 2007

    Love the idea for a “Pipette Prowess” badge. Maybe add something about having a right beefy arm from long days at work? (no innunendo there…)

    I also quite enjoy the “Horse Pituitary Harvester” badge, but would personally have to request a “Goldfish Pituitary Harvester” badge… O_o

    Or maybe a badge for having put several species’ brain tissue (or any tissue?) through the blender?

    Man, I LOVE science!

  106. #106 scienceleagueweirdo
    February 23, 2007

    how about the “my lab partner nearly blew the bunsen burner up in my face” badge?

  107. #107 JT
    February 23, 2007

    The remarks below pertain to the new organization, the one with all the initials.

    Merely some suggestions. (Science is not incompatible with good English; in fact, the better scientific publications insist upon it.)

    These portions of the text require attention:

    The “talking science” badge.
Required for all members. Assumes the recipient conducts himself/herself in such a manner as to talk science whenever he/she gets the chance. Not easily fazed by looks of disinterest from friends or the act of “zoning out” by well intentioned loved ones

    [– Please reword this. “Disinterest” refers to impartiality or lack of bias; uninterested means not interested.]

    The “my degree inadvertantly makes me competent in fixing household appliances” badge.
Not necessarily a good thing.

    [– Please fix spelling of inadvertently.]

    The “I’ve done science with no concievable practical application” badge.
There are probably more who are deserving of this badge than you would expect.

    [– Please fix spelling of conceivable.]

  108. #108 Wedge
    February 23, 2007

    Computers for Scientists I

    Have used Word and Excel (or other O/S equivalents) in a scientific pursuit.

    Computers for Scientists II

    Have programmed in C, html or macros in a scientific pursuit.

    Computers for Scientists III

    Must have used at least 3 of the following in a scientific pursuit: Matlab, Mathcad, Macsyma, C++, Fortran, Assembly, VisualBasic, Perl, SPSS, ORAC/DRACO

  109. #109 Crunchie
    February 24, 2007

    How about a “Have been asked/will donate my body to science when I die” badge. For those freaks people will want to poke and prod post-humously.

  110. #110 Laszlo Xalieri
    February 24, 2007

    The “works with acid” badge should be a “lord of acid” badge. With all due apologies to those who don’t think the cultural reference is worth the chauvanism.

    How about an “I’m still smarter than my computer” badge?

    Here’s seconding the “I can no longer explain what I do to other members of my household”, “I can no longer explain what I do to my coworkers/underlings”, and “I can no longer explain what I do to anybody”. Followed by a potential level IV, “I no longer understand what I do myself, but I hear it’s important/impressive”.

    Perhaps we could use a trio of “C’mon in, the money’s fine”, “underfunded”, and “I give it away for free”.

    Maybe also an “I’ve been jailed for science” badge, too? Not that I’ve earned that one, but I’d certainly respect those who have….


  111. #111 The Spinning Guy (Kim)
    February 25, 2007

    Absolutely need a name dropper badge. Level I for working with a national academy member. Level II for working with a nobel laureate. Level III for being a member of the national academy and level IV for the nobel prize.

  112. #112 Lisa Durkin
    February 26, 2007

    What about science teacher badges?

    Science Teacher Bravery-children under a meter tall:

    Has had the patience to teach science to small children; no matter how messy and disgusting the experiment turned out the recietient of this badge still made it a learning experience.

    Science Teacher Bravery-children in an adolescent funk:

    Has had the nerve to attempt pounding away at scientific concepts even when girls have cleavage and boys have hard-ons. The recipient of this badge can say penis and vagina with a straight face and cut down any gigglers with a dead stare.

    Science Teacher Bravery-lab work with at-risk kids

    Has not flinched at the fact that the kid with the exacto-knife/bottle of acid/bunsen burner is a criminal with a probation officer. Never mind that his mother has absolutely no idea who his father is. The recipient of this badge has remained unfazed.

  113. #113 J-ROC
    February 26, 2007

    I’d like to see a badge with a guitar on it, known as the “I can tell you about a guitar better than I can play it” badge.

    Just a thought,

  114. #114 Rex
    February 27, 2007

    Don’t forget the geologists!

    Maybe something involving rock hammer ownership, weight of rock collection, number of minerals scout is able to ID, has visted one or more active volcanoes et cetera.

  115. #115 karenk
    February 27, 2007

    Badge suggestion: Level I: Has worked with glassware using glycerine Level II: Eschews glycerine in working with glassware (dripping hand on badge)

  116. #116 Andrew from Vancouver
    February 28, 2007

    How about a hazy cloud around a computer outline, for:

    Works in a virtual field, in which all the science is done within the computer. Is virtually important.

  117. #117 Andrew from Vancouver
    February 28, 2007

    Talks Science Level II

    For meritorious service in the face of combat, e.g. with parents who insist on Creation and/or Intelligent Design being taught parallel to Science.

  118. #118 Dan
    February 28, 2007

    How about:

    Chemical Icarus badge: For flying more than 10 feet through the air not under machine power or attached to any bungee or parachute as a result of any chemical reaction.

    The icon could be flaming wings dripping wax
    (Inspired by my own father’s misadventured with mislabled gasoline cans…)

    Why is this Fizzing? This Shouldn’t be Fizzing: Wherein the recipient has been spared serious bodily harm only via their quick reflexes in the chem lab.

    The icon could be a figure in goggles ducking backward and shielding their face with their arm, while an aptly named mortar emits ominous smoke.

    (Inspired by my old chem. teacher’s dry reaction demonstration, the chemicals involved I forget, where the crucible was a little more damp than he realized.)

  119. #119 Jody Bower
    March 1, 2007

    How about “Have injected people in the name of science”
    Level I – subcutaneous
    Level II – deep intramuscular
    Level III – cardiac

    On the “experience with dead bodies” theme, I’d add:
    “Have eaten lunch in the morgue in the presence of a dead body”

    I also think there should be a “played with mercury as a child” badge – a broken thermometer, perhaps

  120. #120 Lindy Bopper
    March 2, 2007

    How come there is no badge for exploding stuff ?

  121. #121 ump_bump_fiz
    March 3, 2007

    How about a “survived a superconducting magnet quench” badge

  122. #122 Jeremy
    March 4, 2007

    It’s scary how many of those I qualify for in one way or another.

    How about “I have practiced my Science in a warzone” badge, or a “Have been shot at while practicing my Science” badge?

  123. #123 Evan
    March 7, 2007

    Autoclave Chef

  124. #124 Jon
    March 7, 2007

    I propose a revision to the big stink suggestions

    I: In which you have created a stink capable of clearing out a lab/room
    II: In which you have created a stink capable of clearing out an entire building
    III: In which you have created a stink which a HazMat team responded to

    How about something for those that use magnets and magnetic fields in research, like “I’ve used a magnets which will stick to a refrigerator” and “I’ve used magnets which a refrigerator will stick to”

  125. #125 Mr. Smith
    March 11, 2007

    I don’t want to go into a bad area here, but there are some of us who have had perfectly normal sex in a scientific laboratory, mainly because we had spent so much time doing research there anyway and it was late at night and we knew who possessed each key so we were sure we wouldn’t be disturbed. That’s gotta be worth a badge.

  126. #126 Mr. Smith
    March 11, 2007

    Three statistics badges:

    Level 1: Having the statistical background to know that the p-value is not the probability the null hypothesis is true.

    Level 2: Having a better statistical background and knowing that the p-value is for all practical purposes the probability the null hypothesis is true.

    Level 3: Being a statistician and pronouncing it “satistics” and being perfectly okay with that.

  127. #127 Thomas Benson
    March 12, 2007

    Here is the 2006 World Science Fiction Convention (LACon IV) take on badges…
    I love exothermic reactions!

  128. #128 Lisa
    March 13, 2007

    Seriously, why aren’t there any microscopy badges???

  129. #129 Luke
    March 15, 2007

    I love the badges. I still have to go through and compile my list, plus the stories that justify them.

    Couple of suggestions for more.

    More than half the words in your abstract are underlined by commercial spell checks.

    Sleep I
    You fall asleep in most talks

    Sleep II
    You fall asleep in most talks, but still ask good questions.

    Sleep III
    You’ve fallen asleep during your own talk.

    I’ve actually made simple image files for these, and can e-mail them to you if you’d like.

  130. #130 Janine
    March 16, 2007

    Are there any plans to make these patches available for purchase? I think they would make excellent dissertation presents for my fellow grad student friends!

  131. #131 Nicole
    March 17, 2007

    I’d love to see a “citizen supporter” badge. Or a badge for “science literate” badge for us non-scientists who take the time to educate ourselves. We support you! (and agree with the articles of Truth 🙂

  132. #132 Sparkey
    March 20, 2007

    Proposed badges:
    A) have performed CPR on a stranger.
    B) they survived.
    C) Communicate worldwide for free via ham radio.
    D) Communicate worldwide in morse code.
    E) Bounce radio signals off the moon to
    chat with friends from home.
    F) Balanced eggs on end during solstice.

  133. #133 jon
    March 21, 2007

    There’s something wrong with the “eaten”, “shower” and “no shower” badges. I don’t see any text for them

  134. #134 Mongoose Scienctist
    March 24, 2007

    I have touched things in the Name of science Level 1: You have touched gooey masses and odd objects for the sake of science.

    I have touched things in the Name of Science Level 2: You have investigated acidic and/or base objects to see what happens

    I have touched things in the Name of Science Level 3: You have been the catalyst of exothermic/endothermic reactions to see how your skin feels afterward. *Also can be Vapourized by substances in the name of science badge

    I have touched things in the Name of Science Level 4: You have handled dangerous and likely deadly toxins in order to see how badly you get hurt. Also can be Vapourized by substances in the name of science badge

  135. #135 Becky
    March 30, 2007

    I Lick Rocks badge

    If you regularly lick rocks or eat dirt in the name of science.

    Licking helps distinguish between silt and clay. Also good for highlighting colors and testing for salt, natch.

  136. #136 Don Oberg-Hauser
    April 6, 2007

    How about:
    I: I have injured someone else doing something stupid in the pursuit of science.
    II: I have injured myself doing something stupid int he pursuit of science.
    III: I have killed someone doing something stupid in the pursuit of science (human)
    IV: I have killed myself doing something stupid in the pursuit of science (posthumous, Darwin Award link).

  137. #137 Don Oberg-Hauser
    April 6, 2007

    Just to make sure I don’t get back to work to soon:
    I: I have taken something apart to see how it works but couldn’t put it back together.
    II: I have taken something apart to see how it works and could it put it back together
    III: same as II but it worked afterwards.
    IV: same as III but it worked better afterwards.

    As a “non-scientist”, it’s a bit disturbing how many of these badges I qualify for.

  138. #138 Gexx
    April 16, 2007

    Licking can also tell the difference between human-deposited ceramics, bone, and dirt. So – yes, there should be a LickTest badge. Perhaps one for inorganic testing (silt/loam/clay) and one for organic (which some may have determined accidentally). Thankfully, I’ve been able to determine old scat before it needed a LickTest. 😉

  139. #139 Imanalchemist
    April 18, 2007

    I know seamaphore badge

    I have a slide rule badges:
    I I own a slide rule
    II I own a slide rule and can use it
    III I own a slide rule with holster and can use it

    can perform complex math on an abacus badge

    Grammer Nazi badge

    I can draft manually (no computer ) badge

    I use semicolons in my email badge

    I use outdated technology badge

    I use outdated terminology badge

    I use old English in my conversations badge

  140. #140 Laura
    April 22, 2007

    Suggestions from my Other Half:

    the “I’m a Theoritician, not an Experimentalist” badge
    the “I’m a Mathematician, all the rest of you guys need me” badge

  141. #141 Laura F.
    April 22, 2007

    Oh wait, I thought of another that I’d actually qualify for:

    the “I will donate/have donated organs to scientific research” badge.
    To qualify one must either have already made clear to their next of kin that they’re pledging their expired body to science, OR (maybe level 2?) you’ve had some manner of -ectomy and your organs were donated to scientific research.

    The symbol could be a jar with an organ of some sort floating in it maybe.

  142. #142 monica
    April 26, 2007

    1. You have something named after you.

    2. Have has same paper rejected from 5 journals.

    3. Chose to stay in same field as you did your grad work.

  143. #143 zigra
    April 26, 2007

    I’d like to expand on Roger’s Nobel Prize badge:

    Level 1: Have passed a Nobel Prize winner in the hall
    Level 2: Was mentored by a Nobel Prize winner
    Level 3: Mentored a Nobel Prize winner
    Level 4: Won a Nobel Prize
    Level 5: Won an argument with a Nobel Prize winner

    I also think there should be an: Have made small explosived using dry ice and plastic tubes badge.

  144. #144 Ursula
    April 26, 2007

    These were very funny! My mom and dad named their first cat Glabella. I am thankful because it got the name out of the way for me.

    Child of a scientist badge

    Was kept busy as a preschooler putting test tubes in boxes for hours.

  145. #145 SpotWeld
    April 26, 2007

    In the same theme of “respect me – I’ve published…” , maybe “I have a patent in my name” badge, with additional pins for 1-5 and related powers of ten.

    Also a “I have used my powers of science for good” badge. (I’d suggest a Superman “S” for that, but I suspect there’d a copywrite vilation there. Maybe just a “Don’t be evil” badge.

  146. #146 B33J
    April 26, 2007

    Bisected an animal in a lab.
    Bisected an animal in a lab you previously owned.
    Bisected an animal in a lab you stole from your neighbors yard.
    Bisected an animal in a lab that’s an endangered species.
    (maybe just a silouhette of a cat for the badge?)

  147. #147 B33J
    April 26, 2007

    Dissected? >_<

  148. #148 SpotWeld
    April 26, 2007

    Would it be possible to have a badge so people can display thier Erd?s number? (

  149. #149 Michael Cloppert
    April 26, 2007

    The “experienced with electrical shock” badge (LEVEL IV):
    In which the recipient has had experience destroying electronic components by virtue of unintentional overload or nonlinear feedback loop. Often received alongside “experienced with fire”. Rarely received alongside math-related badges.

  150. #150 Mindbleach
    April 26, 2007

    “I work with obscure units,” Preferably with a picture of a slug. For all the people who work with slugs, moles, stones, AU, Henries, etc.
    “My pet theory has been oversimplified or misinterpreted in popular fiction.” AKA the Micheal Crichton badge.
    “My job is way more exciting/interesting in fiction than in reality.” AKA the CSI badge.
    “I have appeared on national news opposite a complete crackpot.” In certain circumstances, both sides of a debate could earn this badge at once.
    “I have accidentally inhaled, absorbed, or ingested psychotropic drugs.” AKA the Abbie Award.
    High-energy badge: “I have heated at least 25kg of material above 500 degrees C at once” or “I have introduced over 1MJ to a system for a single experiment.”
    Ditto on clean environment and Homeland Security badges. “I have performed experiments I am now obligated to deny” is brilliant.
    “I have 90%+ pure samples of at least 50 elements in my home.” Could have levels for purity and number of elements represented.
    “I have repeated an experiment ad nauseum out of disbelief of the results.” Bonus chevron for every pet theory and common-sense belief you’ve had shattered by such an experience.
    Computer Engineering I/II/II: “I have designed / manufactured / programmed for my own microchip.”
    “I have used a computer or cluster more than a decade ahead of its time.” Alternately, “I have programmed computers that once cost thousands of dollars and are now outclassed by some TI calculators.”
    “I have programmed MATLAB, Maple, or Mathematica to do work I would otherwise have assigned to a student.”

  151. #151 Radar Software Ninja
    April 26, 2007

    How about three levels of Radar?

    I: I’ve worked on a missile defense radar.
    II: I’ve operated a missile defense radar during a ballistic missile test.
    III: I’ve broken a missile defense radar.

    Also, maybe a phone receiver badge for “I’m the guy they call when things break.” Veterans of this badge often wear the phone-receiver-crossed-out badge: “Don’t call me just because you think something is broken; but, actually, you just forgot how to do your job.” Think hard before calling upon the wearer of both badges to “fix” something!

  152. #152 Jason Ahlquist
    April 26, 2007

    How about “My now widely-accepted theory/hypothesis/model/whatever was once branded quackery/fringe/whatever” Not to encourage the perpetual motion people or flat-Earthers, but I’m sure there are a bunch of mathemeticians, biologists and physicists out there who qualify.

  153. #153 Adrienne
    April 26, 2007

    How about “I grew up AND actually became an astronaut”? Or better yet, “I grew up and STILL want to be an astronaut”?

  154. #154 Mark
    April 26, 2007

    I love the badges, but the Statistical Linear Regression badge is *wrong*. It shows a normal distribution, not a linear regression which is, as the name suggests, a straight line.

    The bell curve is more recognizable, but still …

  155. #155 tim rowledge
    April 26, 2007

    Following up on:-
    “Extend David’s Aviator badges with Astronaut badges:
    Level I: I’ve used a spacecraft simulator.
    Level II: I’ve been aboard a spacecraft.
    Level III: I’ve actually been in space.”
    – Level IV: I’m an alien

    It rather worries me how badges I’m enttitled to wear. I’m not even a practising scientist – just a mechanicl/software engineer with an Art/Design masters.

  156. #156 Eric
    April 26, 2007

    Seconding the:

    “Not a Zombie/Cannibal”
    Have handled brains for purposes other then eating.

  157. #157 splene
    April 26, 2007

    I second the “smuggled samples” and “child of scientist” badges. How about “I hold a license for Class 1 Narcotics and/or other controlled substances for science” badge (the level II version would be “I synthesized radioactive Semtex for science” or “I administered these controlled substances to human subjects” badge)? “Worked in Biohazard Containment” badge, with levels for the various levels of Biohazard containment? And the most tasteless of all “Had sex in a walk-in incubator”.

  158. #158 rebecca
    April 27, 2007

    As a wildlife biologist who is currently in graduate school for physician assistant studies, whoo boy, i have had my share of badges, especially the feces variety. also was a veterinary technician for a spell and an environmental scientist for several years.

    I propose a badge for the wildlife biologists out there:

    Have been bitten by most of an Order of Mammals in the name of scientific research.
    Have spent thousands of hours in the field and my research was usurped for publication without my name attached.
    Have consumed animal urine.

    oh i have so many. i did keep a collection of roadkill in my freezer for study skin preparation. and convinced the infectious disease ward in a major hospital that i had tularmia due to infected animal exposure. sweet. love the badges, wish i could buy them.

  159. #159 JoeS
    April 27, 2007

    How about a badge for someone who’s scientific experiment has flown on the space shuttle or space station?

  160. #160 Shaun Evans
    April 27, 2007

    Hi, i love these badges they are really funky!

    … but, erm, can we have a freezing Level 4, for Liquid Helium use 😀

    …and a badge with a squid for “I play with SQUIDs”, and some xray based ones for idiots who…erm… .may or may not have wrecked a few diffractometers (and tripped a safety shutter/ port /forced beam dump at a synchrotron for levels II, III, IV)


  161. #161 n
    April 27, 2007

    two suggestions:

    1. unaided astronomy
    able to identify 10 constelations, 5 asterims, and the 5 obervable solar system bodies without refrence. Also, able to tell the lattitude based on the position of polaris.

    2. Armchair thoertical astrophysicist
    able to discuass at length the concpets of theoretical physics, but unable to comprehend or explain the math.

  162. #162 Louis Whaley
    April 27, 2007

    The non-explainer badge, level IV: I done something so complicated that I can’t understand it after I’m done doing it, but it works like I intended it.

  163. #163 miriam
    April 27, 2007

    I would add a cooking badge:
    have used lab equipment to prepare food for human consumption. thoughts on levels?

    The “I can’t do my job without my toys!” badge, for those of us who are utterly dependent on equipment to do our job. Levels can be for expense/ complexity, rarity of equipment (ex: computer, microscope, linear accelerator…) Logo could be child holding teddy bear.

    Also, for the physicians: can confidently answer to the “is there a doctor in the house?” question

    I think you have enough badges that you will need to organize them by category– working with humans, working with animals, working with numbers, working with forces of nature, working with forces of un-nature…

  164. #164 miriam
    April 27, 2007

    another badge for medicos– for being unable to stop staring at someone’s veins while talking to them

  165. #165 Kari
    April 27, 2007

    How about a badge for taxonomy?

    Or, a badge for finding a whole bunch of new species but not having the time to do anything about it?

  166. #166 Daniel
    April 27, 2007

    These badges are great!

    – “Gone in a week” badge (for an unidentified rash, infection or allergic reaction”)
    – “Shoulda been a doctor” badge (for bitterness)
    – Bad Handwriting badge
    – “Enlightened Ignoramus” badge (for a non-scientist involved In science)
    – “I do the real work” badge (for technicians)

  167. #167 pthu
    April 27, 2007

    Giving A Scientific Talk badge
    Level 1: Powerpoint
    Level 2: Overhead projector with transparencies
    Level 3: With only a chalkboard. Need not be legible.

    Laboratory Refrigerator badge
    Level 1: have used a laboratory refrigerator
    Level 2: have used a laboratory refrigerator with biohazard label
    Level 3: have used a laboratory refrigerator with biohazard label to store lunch

  168. #168 Fatman
    April 27, 2007

    My name is synonymous with nuclear explosion.

    Will dance for grant money.

    Once teleported into the body of a fly.

    Cloned Jesus in the name of science (and for fun).

    Knows how a lighbulb works.

    Accidentally unleashed a zombie horde.

  169. #169 Joal Heagney
    April 28, 2007

    Safety Conscious Badge
    Have spent so much time working with dangerous substances, that you no longer feel safe doing a stir-fry without safety glasses.

  170. #170 LE4dGOLEM
    April 28, 2007

    Suggestion: an “I’m so awesome I actually qualify for all these badges, but there is only so much room where I store them” badge

  171. #171 gexx
    April 28, 2007

    I second, third, and fourth the “tech” badge idea.

  172. #172 flip
    April 29, 2007


    various levels-

    – I am a scientist and have had sex
    – I am a scientist and have found a tolerant mate
    – I am a scientist and have procreated

    – I am the child of a scientist
    – I have had children with another scientist
    – I have procreated a scientist
    – I masturbate and think of scientists
    – I masturbate for the sake of science

  173. #173 Gearboy
    April 29, 2007

    There should definitely be a ‘Have stormed out of a movie theatre in protest’ badge.

  174. #174 Elia
    April 29, 2007

    I second the level 4 “have frozen stuff in liquid helium” suggestion, as well as the electrified pickle badge.

    Also: “Embarrasses self from excitement when driving past particle accelerators” badge

  175. #175 nik
    April 30, 2007

    The “I’ve caused a Creationist to threaten me with physical violence if I don’t shut up dissing God” badge.

  176. #176 Al
    April 30, 2007

    I feel the “The “has frozen stuff just to see what happens” badge” needs a level IV- there’s quite a step up from liquid nitrogen to helium- after all, even undergraduate students have ready access to nitrogen and enough unsupervised time to freeze anything that comes to hand (or, indeed, their hands).

  177. #177 Bla
    May 1, 2007

    I have pipeted fot 8 hurs straight

    I have gotten more lines on my target protein then my standard while running a gell

    Made the person who is getting sexualy harrased think that sexual harrasmet is funny

    Won 3 or more dry ice battles in a row

    Linked two offices with a comunicatin tube

    Hid heperesite stink bomb that was not disovered for 24 hours

    Lost it after thinking someone mooved his samples

  178. #178 KimBoo York
    May 1, 2007

    I am shocked that there is no “Under the Skin” badge for those who have actually tattooed something science-related (equations, symbols, etc.) onto themselves. Shocked, I say!!

  179. #179 liz
    May 1, 2007

    microscopy badges of different levels:
    I) light/ fluorescent microscopes
    II) confocal microscope
    III) scanning electron microscope, two-photon microscope

  180. #180 KBora
    May 2, 2007

    Suggestion for another badge:

    Re-animation badge for those of us who have used science to bring someone or something back from the dead

  181. #181 Rob
    May 3, 2007

    How about some neuroscience badges? Badges for having had an fMRI scan, badges for using/conducting Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation, Badges for the use of electroencephalogram, that kind of stuff. Also, an “It’s not neuroscience” badge to compliment the rocket science badge? Even a “I may have irreconcilably damaged my brain in the name of science” badge for those using experimental techniques would be useful!

  182. #182 Jongpil Yun
    May 3, 2007

    The “have violated the posterior of an animal in the name of science” badge. Level 2: That animal was human.

  183. #183 Timon
    May 4, 2007

    So many of these are great. How about an “in a relationship with a fellow scientist” or “have maintained a long distance relationship for science” badge? Think of how many couples you see in science – even in the same field.

    I’d like to suggest a special badge for planning and executing a wedding while doing a long distance relationship for science, but that might be a bit obscure.

  184. #184 Maggie Bierman
    May 4, 2007

    The “I have let science seriously impair my ability to find a mate” badge.

    Example, my Microbiology professor created a “tapeworm dance” regarding the myth that if you have a tapeworm and don’t eat it will come looking for food — out one end or the other. In her scenario it simultaneously comes out both ends and the dance entails grabbing on to each end and “flossing” while shaking your leg around in the air for added movement.

    It was quite disturbing.

  185. #185 LauraJ
    May 5, 2007

    Yes to many above, but partic. the anthro/archaeo badges — “I see dead people, parts of them, anyway”

    Have excavated feces/ feces over 100 years old/ over 1000 years old

    Understand the difference between uncalibrated and calibrated radiocarbon dates

    Have tried to convert Intelligent Design advocates to understanding evolution/
    Have a degree in theology and have tried to convert ID, etc /work in pastoral ministry and tried…. etc.

    oh, I could go on, too. Thanks.

  186. #186 Dana
    May 10, 2007

    I think you guys need some geology badges.
    How about “Experienced Rock Licker”
    Whereby the recipient habitually tastes any rocks he or she comes across to determine composition, regardless of the conditions in which the rock was found.

  187. #187 DanL
    May 11, 2007

    There is not much here for the field researchers. I’d like to suggest:

    Chased by angry villagers badge
    Evacuated from field site badge
    Discovered new species badge
    Caught tropical disease in the name of science badge
    My skin is an ecosystem badge
    Have traveled to places the State Department warned me against in the name of science
    Kidnapped in the name of science
    Shot at in the name of science
    In plane crash in the name of science badge
    Learned to use automatic weapon in name of science
    Has bribed foreign officials in name of science
    Has tasted study organism to determine toxicity badge

  188. #188 Glenn M
    May 14, 2007

    You really need a badge for smell.

    “I’ve stunk for science” With a nose in profile with a clothespin over it. Would cover everything from hot field work to working with carcases to working with insects in storage where the smell of napthalene permeates everything. Level 2 could be stink for science but are so accustomed to it that you no longer notice, but people around you give you a wide berth.

  189. #189 noah
    May 15, 2007

    can we acctulay get these as real badges? I want the squid on or the dolphin one! any ways you should make a…

    I wear a bowtie while experimenting badge- bow tie pic
    I actully know what an ectoplasmic reation isand dont just say it cuz i think it makes me sound smart badge- question mark
    I don’t really like science but I want a badge badge- smile and beaker

  190. #190 noah
    May 15, 2007

    can we acctulay get these as real badges? I want the squid on or the dolphin one! any ways you should make a…

    I wear a bowtie while experimenting badge- bow tie pic
    I actully know what an ectoplasmic reation isand dont just say it cuz i think it makes me sound smart badge- question mark
    I don’t really like science but I want a badge badge- smile and beaker

  191. #191 jolly
    May 16, 2007

    I lost my wife, as I never came home badge!

    I gave a pupil a C because he understood the subject better than me badge!

    I’ve spent so long looking at different metals they have now started to talk to me badge!

    In the interests of human survival, I destroyed my notes badge!

    The, they spent/wasted 60 million, but I only suggested it as a joke badge!

    The carbon dating badge!- the recipient should have actually dated carbon!-or feel like they have as they have spent so long dating stuff, that they have forgotten what a member of the opposite sex looks like!

    In the name of science I have fogotten what a member of the opposite sex looks like badge!

    The thinking about thinking badge!

    The I didnt really make that badge. The recipient should feel utterly asshamed of their invention. or how their invention has been mis-used!

    The I spent 30 years invetergating something utterly stupid and now live in a cave; as my 4 year old daugther proved to me, it was stupid- badge!

    The, I watch rocks badge!

    The, in the name of social science I externalized my whole family badge!

    The I will arrogantly attack anyone who has not read my 30 volume thesis on snails badge!

    I invented 30 new 15 letter words, to support those trying to read my 30 volume thesis on snails badge!

    I am not a scientist/doctor as I faked my certificates and now work in a hospital badge.

    I invented a new smell badge!

    I invented a new specieses badge!

    I re-invented myself as a scientist badge!

    The, I did 10,000 experiments but hid the 5,000 that didnt work badge!

    The, sod science show me the money badge!

    The, I killed my lab partner before he could publish badge!

    The, I really dont get it, but as a male must pretend I do Badge.

    The, I have given a speach/ sermon/ interview/ lecture about science badge!

    The, I bought my doctorate on the internet badge!

    The, my invention has killed badge-1, 2, 3, and 4 going up with each 100,000!

    The, I actually got laid by talking about science badge! 1 2 and 3 This is to increase- a student no.1 a normal person in night club 2. and 3- twins!

  192. #192 DarthParadox
    June 7, 2007

    Agreed on the need for a dry-ice-explosions badge (the level II frozen-things badge just doesn’t cut it, and the exothermic reactions one doesn’t either).

  193. #193 Vicky
    June 24, 2007

    I think there should be a “I work with wood” badge. As you can guess that often needs clarification as to what form of wood. I’ve heard every joke about getting my hands on wood, and would I like to handle your wood jokes. It could be said I suffer for my science.

  194. #194 Michelle
    June 26, 2007

    Wow, there are a ton of us geeks out there with nothing better to do than come up with dorky badges! Some funny …and some scary!

    I second the time warp badge…ironically find myself in one now.

  195. #195 Steff Z
    July 8, 2007

    OH NO!
    I discovered an impending Science Scout catastrophe.
    Quick! Please institute a new rule than no member may have BOTH the Ninja AND the Pirate badge! As soon as possible!!!

    Then please revoke one of the two from each member that has mistakenly claimed both. (I shudder to think what might happen to these poor unfortunates, if we’re too late.)

    Then set up a procedure by which a member may trade in one for the other, in case it turns out to be theoretically possible to undergo such a fundamental alteration.

  196. #196 Archer
    July 16, 2007

    As a followup to the “rocket science” badge:
    “I actually AM a brain surgeon”
    “My scientific research is currently under scrutiny by the Department of Homeland Security”

  197. #197 Archer
    July 16, 2007

    Um. . . that is, exactly what Rob said above (sorry- I work with numbers not words).

  198. #198 Jimbo
    July 19, 2007

    I’m thinking there needs to be several badges for those of us who conduct our work in developing contries. How about these badges…

    “I conduct research in a developing nation”

    Level 1) “I have lived out of a tent in the name of science.”
    Level 2) “I have been bitten by a wild monkey and didn’t go to the hospital…because that was a day’s walk away.”
    Level 3) “At my field site people carry spears.”
    Level 4) “I have been held up by people with automatic weapons in the name of science.”

  199. #199 Joe
    July 30, 2007

    I feel a great badge would be the ubiquitous alternative to the “Dodging monkey shit” badge, for the person NOT able to get out of the way of said monkey shit.

  200. #200 donald
    August 5, 2007

    I see you have a switch from doing science to philosophy of science badge. How about a “gave up humanities to do science”-esque badge.

    Also, “I stick wires in live animals brains”; “I’ve played with human brains” as a separate badge under the “i’ve held human organs”. you could also include “i’ve held a heart” &c.

    finally, “i dumped my girlfriend for science, and YES she was real!”

  201. #201 Brian
    August 11, 2007

    for those who do field work in rugged areas (geology, biology, ecology):

    1. Have spent days hiking and camping in the middle of nowhere to obtain a sample/specimen badge

    2. Have most likely been stalked by a large cat while doing field work without knowing it badge

    3. Have climbed a mountain or large hill just to take a photograph of nature in situ badge

    4. Have used horses as transportation to get to field site badge

    5. Have wondered who owns the land your field site is on badge

    and, one final one….unrelated to field work

    6. Have suddenly become go-to climate expert for family with questions about global warming even though not actually a climate scientist badge

  202. #202 Kamel
    September 5, 2007

    I haven’t read through all the comments, so maybe it’s a repeat but what about the autoclave badge for those of us who have burned ourselves using such an instrument. Though, I suppose the lingering scars are their own badges.

  203. #203 heather
    September 11, 2007

    Yeah, another vote for a teacher badge, that would be excellent – thanks!

  204. #204 Dr von Zarkov
    September 18, 2007

    The “I work in a mushroom factory” badge, featuring a toadstool rampant.
    Level I: My boss keeps me in the dark and feeds me bullshit.
    Level II: I keep my workers in the dark and feed them bullshit.

  205. #205 Bill Sullivan
    September 25, 2007

    I suggest the image of a rocket similar to the “Rocket Scientist” badge, but with the tail upward and giving off a trail of smoke. The rocket is crumpled and embedded in the ground. The badge is “I am a Rocket Scientist who has actually crashed a rocket.” a.k.a., the Prang badge.

  206. #206 Silicon Shaman
    September 26, 2007

    There really ought to be a badge for those of us that do science for fun… i.e, the “I’m not getting paid to do this stuff.”

    A dollar sign in the universal symbol for no, i.e a barred circle, perhaps?

    There could be levels:
    Level I. Does High School Science projects for fun.
    Level II. Does college Level science projects for fun.
    Level III. Does original work for fun.
    Level IV. Has had original work published in peer reviewed journal. [and unpaid still.]
    Level V. Original work has confirmed/disproved long-standing theory in field.
    Level VI. Has come up with a widely accepted theory in field.

  207. #207 rhairston
    October 3, 2007

    Science teacher badges are way overdue, if for no other reason than Bravery and Service to Humanity. I might add the “Mr/Ms. Know-It-All” category, for we teachers who are brought everything from baby birds to broken computers because “you’ll know what to do with it.”

  208. #208 Beth
    October 4, 2007

    Science / Math teacher badges, but also how about pure math instead of just applied? You know, us abstract people that can tell you about the topology of the klein bottle. In math code.
    Level 1 – have writen a proof.
    Level 2 – Went through months in math without using numbers.
    Level 3 – Are in a mathematical field and rarely use numbers.
    Level 4 – Work in mathematical analysis and don’t use numbers. (Yes, it happens, actually fairly frequently where I am.)

    I seriously ditto the “Jargon” one needs to be used – with multiple levels, including one for “My coworkers don’t even understand!” and one for “I’ve had to lesson plan for a talk with my mother.”
    Long story.


    One for amount of textbooks you own? Including textbooks you picked up for informational / research, of classes you’ve never taken (my three genetic books are out, and I’m a math teacher – without any other grounding in it other than what I read / pick up from friends / research on my own time).

  209. #209 Dave
    October 7, 2007

    Must second the motion for the “slide rule” Badge series.

    An Oscilloscope Badge is a must… along with a Lissajous pattern in a negation circle – “I think Lissajous patterns are silly”

    Adding to the LASER badge suggestion, “I own a real LASER (not a LASER pointer)” and “I see floaters as a result of LASER experiments”

    Science in the Movies
    I – My friends and/or spouse will no longer watch movies with me.
    II – I have been a science consultant for a movie.
    III – I have been a science consultant for a movie and my advice was ignored.

  210. #210 Matt
    October 7, 2007

    The “I build robots” badge level V: “I am a robot.”

  211. #211 Avacar
    October 9, 2007

    The “My research goes in circles and I get no where but nobody understands it so they keep funding me” badge

    Image: A circle with an arrowhead pointing at the tail

    this badge is awarded to people who seem to keep researching forever, but don’t get anywhere.

  212. #212 Martin
    October 11, 2007

    “I have accidentialy destroyed a laboratoy badge while working in the interests of science” badge

    Pretty self explanatory, might have a requirement of pictures to be submited for evaluation of destructivness (For example: 50% of laboratory must be in need of rebuilding/refiting).

    Bonus points for: wider destruction, injuries from said incident, destruction of sensitive/expensive equiptment, keeping your job after said incident,…

    Image: Scientist runnig from colapsing/burning/exploding building.

    Possible second level: “I have gone through several laboratories while working in the interests of science” badge.

  213. #213 cassandra
    October 17, 2007

    There should be a badge to distinguish those of us who work with Very Dangerous small organisms from those who work with “Potentially” dangerous ones. Maybe something following the Biosafety Levels.
    Level 1: works with organisms that you could probably eat.
    Level 2: works with organisms that you shouldn’t touch with bare hands.
    Level 3: wears a spacesuit at work.
    Level 4: wears a spacesuit, has mainlined air, and works with organisms that would kill you in a most horrible fashion.

  214. #214 Andrea
    November 14, 2007

    I have licked for science?
    Image: tongue

    I’ve licked and been licked for science
    Image: 2 tongues

  215. #215 Matt
    November 15, 2007

    I would like to propose the “I’ve gotten high in the lab” (or something similar) badge, could have something like the dazed and confused smiley face in it

    2 grades:
    I – Involuntary “Whether it was a leak in the anesthetic scavenger bag or too much ether in the room, this is for everyone whose work has made them more than just dizzy.”
    II – Voluntary “Who says our research subjects should get to have all the fun?”

  216. #216 Constance
    November 18, 2007

    Your badges are truly wonderful, and I laughed… and laughed… I worked shortly for CalTech Seismological Laboratory (1970, receptionist)and UCRiverside CA, Soil & Environmental Science (1988, graduate secretary), so recognize the spirit of these badges of merit. I have two adult “boys” who are Eagle Scouts, and trust me, they’ve made up a number of their own badges.

    I am, alas, an English major, retired teacher, and copy editor. So, I offer this: “inadvertently” — e, not a

    The �my degree inadvertantly makes me competent in fixing household appliances� badge.
    Not necessarily a good thing. (JN)

    Keep up the good work & marvelous sense of humor!

    Constance Bates

  217. #217 Meredith M. Clancy
    December 6, 2007

    How about, to accompany those other childhood dream badges,
    “I grew up and ACTUALLY became a veterinarian.”

    LOVE the badges.

  218. #218 Joolya
    December 11, 2007

    Handles items in the liquid N2 tank with bare hands

    Dry ice usage:
    1) To make “bombs” using dry ice and eppendorf tube
    2) To put in mouth and blow “smoke”

    Works with lentivirus
    1) Works with lentivirus *without gloves*

    Has done miniprep NOT using Qiagen kit

    Use of labware in non-lab setting or for non-scientific purpose, including but not limted to:
    – water bong
    – extremely accurate measuring device in the kitchen
    – dry ice in beer cooler
    – cooking turkey in the autoclave
    – (pre-9/11) using 50mL falcon tubes as travel-sized shampoo bottles

    Use of non-labware for lab research purposes, including but not limited to:
    – hair dryer stage heater (taped to ring stand, e.g.)
    – any application of JELLO
    – human saliva as cleaning agent
    – 3×5 notecard as shutter/filter device
    – non-fat dry milk as blocking agent (standard protocol!)
    – random electrical components jury-rigged into more serious lab tools

    The “I only answer emails” badge. (That is, not the phone or, in extreme cases, verbal communications. Can include use of iPod or headphones when not actually listening to music.)

    Knowing Impact Factors of all perr-reviewed journals

  219. #219 Ele
    December 12, 2007

    I second the “uses Kimwipes for tissues” badge vote and the calls for a “high voltage” badge, or knows how to say “danger, high voltage in three or more languages”. Would also like to see:
    -requires background security check to do science
    -has used sports equipment for scientific purposes
    -survived attack by unidentified sea creature
    -has own hard helmet and steel-toed boots
    -attempted science at sea in gale force winds
    -has electrical tape in every pocket
    -has soldered electronics in a non-inertial frame of reference
    -has used vodka to clean equipment
    -has been shipwrecked, for science
    -has had to explain “but I’m a scientist” to heavily armed soldier
    -risked perpetual peer-review purgatory as editor

  220. #220 Alice Massoglia
    February 2, 2008

    next level of pubbing badges: “I have been published in a professional peer reviewed journal”

  221. #221 Beth
    February 12, 2008

    I’ve done science experiments at home.

    I have my own science equipment at home (pipettors, telescopes, research animals…)

    Use laboratory techniques when cooking at home

    Have accidentally grossed out others by discussing/reading about science in public.

    My Family Has No Idea What I Actually Do for a Living

    Own my own microscope

    Have been a research subject

    and I would like to second “I do the real work” for technicians…

    These are awesome!

  222. #222 Chris
    February 21, 2008

    This one definitly needs a Level III

    Level III (oral tradition): My child uses Latin names to refer to organisms whose common names they do not know.

    “The Linnaeus Badge

    Level I (written): I can confidently apply the nominative plural and genitive plural forms of Latin nouns to written taxonomic descriptions

    Level II (oral): I incorporate Latin species names into my everyday conversations with no apparent difficulty in pronunciation. In fact, I prefer to use Latin names over common names.”

  223. #223 jamesh.g.
    February 21, 2008

    well, I’ll be needing a badge , with a little twisted bit of chain welded to the center of a round thing

  224. #224 STS
    March 5, 2008

    Hey! Love the badges. Why are they all grey? Let’s get some colour in there!

    I think there should be a badge for creative uses of Parafilm (TM). Also for “used science concepts in a pickup line” and “cooking with >4 phyla” or something. Also (more seriously) “stayed in science despite my disability” badge. Just try getting a good job in academia when you have a disability! Everyone who does this deserves more than a badge.

  225. #225 Tracy
    March 7, 2008

    I would like to see the “bomb calorimetry” badge. For people who explode things every day in the name of science!

  226. #226 Robin
    March 12, 2008

    “Has exploded things in front of schoolchildren in the name of science” badge … for people who have tried to recruit new young scientists by exploding things for them.

  227. #227 Robin
    March 12, 2008

    “My kid has seen a pipetman” badge

    “My kid knows how to use a pipetman” badge

    “My kid knows how to repair a pipetman” badge

    “My kid was conceived with the use of a pipetman” badge, for those test tube babies

  228. #228 Brandt
    March 19, 2008

    a badge for consideration:
    1) I’ve blinded myself with science’ badge — (a pair of horn-rimmed X-Ray or 3-D glasses).

  229. #229 April
    March 21, 2008

    Suggestions for badges (and yes, I qualify for all of these)

    Can write in machine code
    Has participated in animal castration/neutering
    Has grown a tadpole into a frog
    Has intentionally used leftover food as an experiment with mold
    Using science and logic, has successfully altered someone’s religious views
    Has closely examined roadkill
    Has taken roadkill home
    Has harvested parts from roadkill for further study
    Has successfully overcome nausea from smell of roadkill
    Has squatted over a mirror in search of more data
    Has applied for a patent
    Has been granted a patent
    Has been granted more than one patent
    Has published in peer publications
    Has presented at a peer conference
    Has shot living creatures into space (definition of “space” could be broken out further)
    2-6 inches (most rodents, for example)
    7-24 Inches (rabbits, cats, dogs, for example)
    25-up (humans, horses, elephants, whales)

  230. #230 Chris Ramsay
    March 25, 2008

    It is beyond me why there is no “Have used a magnifying glass to focus the sun’s power on something not accustomed to that kind of intense heat” badge.

  231. #231 drdrA
    March 27, 2008

    Hey- where’s the most spectacular lab mishap or mistake badge….. on second thought maybe that’s not something we want to celebrate!

    I love the suggestion about ‘my kid knows how to use a pipetman’ badges… seems like you could have a whole series of badges for kids:

    ‘I can rack tips’ badge
    ‘I can identify an eppendorf tube’ badge…etc.

  232. #232 Chrystal
    March 28, 2008

    How about a science oldtimer badge for people who started working in the lab long before starbucks ever showed up on campus. Long before safety regulations were enforced. When it was still considered A-okay to have a cup of coffee sitting on your lab bench beside you, and the mugs were washed with the rest of the lab glassware. For a design, maybe a wrinkly hand (or a skeleton!) holding a radioactive cup of coffee.

    Lab princess badge for the person (male or female) who whined their way through their PhD, never replaced any of the common reagents, and left all their glassware for others to clean up. This badge would feature a tiara.

    Lab saint badge for the person who always refilled the buffer containers, and did the glassware that the lab princess left in the sink. This would be a halo.

  233. #233 marit fp
    April 6, 2008

    I second both the coffee and the laser badges, especially after what I just did in my physics lab. whee!

    Seasick I
    bearer has performed research in a small boat (motorized or no)

    Seasick II
    bearer has performed research in open bays/estuaries/large rivers and lakes in a moderately sized boat

    Seasick III
    bearer has performed research in open ocean in a large ship

    Seasick IV
    bearer has performed research in a hurricane/typhoon in any size ship

    I may look like a scientist, but I’m actually a pirate II
    bearer has performed research on a sailing vessel

    I may look like a scientist, but I’m actually a pirate III
    sextant, celestial navigation, dead reckoning, noon sight: the bearer knows all of the above terms and can do them.

    Mad Lab Skillz
    comfortable performing in lab under any and every condition possible. bonus points for refilling formalin (or other interesting chemical) bottles in the dark in 7-foot seas.

  234. #234 Sam
    May 6, 2008

    Some suggestions for badges:
    I’d like to see some Library Science related badges. Perhaps something along the lines of the following?

    [picture of bookshelf with Roman numeral I]
    Badge name: Shhhh I
    Description: Subject has spent extensive time in a library, skin likely to be quite pale.

    [picture of bookshelf with Roman numeral II]
    Badge name: Shhhh II
    Description: Subject has thorough knowledge of library workings. Can recite Dewey Decimal Numbers accurately

    And perhaps a badge relating to “field trips” or school presentations.

    [picture of schoolhouse]
    Badge Name: Pediaphobia
    Description: Subject has survived a close encounter of the childish kind while presenting science in an elementary school setting.

    [picture of high school]
    Badge Name: [something clever]
    Description: Subject has manage to impress a class of teenagers… with science!

    And what about recruiting?
    [Uncle Sam pointing finger thingy]
    Badge Name: Recruiter
    Description: Subject has actively recruited others to join the ranks of those fighting for Truth, Science, and the empirical method!

  235. #235 Angel in Portland
    May 8, 2008

    I think there needs to be a
    have had sex (with self or others – could be seperate badges) in the midst of doing published research —or something of that nature.

  236. #236 celticsmith
    May 21, 2008

    5 levels of scientist

    -Scientist: a profile with heart, someone who does science out of love for science.
    -Ticked off Scientist: Profile with an exclamation point, Someone who does science for a corp.
    -Pissed off Scientist: Profile with two exclamation points, Someone who does science for the military.
    -Mad scientist: Profile with 3 exclamation points. Someone who works for world dominators…as Terry Pratchett would say, “anyone who uses that many exclamation point is seriously demented”.
    INSANE Scientist: Profile with a question mark, For people who are supposed to be scientists..yet even well known scientists have no idea what THEY are talking about.

    They ask you questions like this at parties…

    What is YOUR favorite amino acid derivative? Mine is aspartyl-phenylalanine-1-methyl ester…and let me tell you why….

  237. #237 Marco Z
    June 21, 2008

    Really small scale/large scale phenomena:
    a badge with 10^-1x or 10^1x on it.

    appropriate for someone caught saying
    “femtosecond jitter is BAD” or “that was 5 geomagnetic reversals ago”

  238. #238 Burrow
    June 21, 2008

    How about a badge for people who then use their spare time trying to knit (or crochet) different mathematical spaces and surfaces. I guess this could be extended to other things like DNA and stuff, but it’s much harder to figure out how to knit a fractal then a strand of DNA. Believe me, I’m trying to knit the first one.

  239. #239 Natalie
    July 29, 2008

    Correct me if I’m wrong, but I think maybe the “I’ve eaten what I study” badge should read either “Hopefully, the minority of MD�s are eligible for this one” or “Hopefully, the majority of MD�s are ineligible for this one.” Not “Hopefully, the minority of MD�s are ineligible for this one.” Although I’m going to have to check to make sure my doctor isn’t a cannibal the next time I go in for a check-up now…

  240. #240 liz newton
    August 14, 2008

    i’m confused. i don’t understand this site, or this concept – but i like the badges. i wandered across this site through a blog and now my head hurts trying to understand it…
    but i write relatively geeky articles about animals and i make wildlife tv for a living – can i join your gang? 🙂

  241. #241 Monado
    August 31, 2008

    Other possibilities:
    * Tadpole badge. Level II – have raised tadpoles to little frogs or toads
    * Have successfully kept turtles or lizards or snakes
    * Have donated animals to the zoo
    * Can tell the sex of a fruitfly (Level 2, in flight)
    * Have handled dangerous bases
    * Have dyed little pieces of cloth in the lab
    * Have created new minerals (melted things to see what would happen, Level 3, in a kiln). Earlier levels: 1, in the oven or on electric stove; 2, over flame.
    * Have kept hibernating reptiles alive & well over the winter
    * Have raised non-domestic baby birds to flight stage
    * Have rescued wild animals from indoors & gotten them out
    * Recognize birds by their calls
    * Get close enough to birds to photograph them
    * Catch birds in bare hands

  242. #242 Steve
    October 16, 2008

    How about the “Have bravely used science humour in a non-science setting and suffered the appropriate amount of ridicule” badge?

  243. #243 Jameson Sawyer
    October 27, 2008

    The ‘Willing Guinea Pig’ badge

    To earn this badge one must have been involved as a patient in one or more clinical trials of medications that have a use beyond simple pain relief (Diabetes or Multiple Sclerosis treatments, etc) with knowledge of the goals of the the trial. Whether you received an actual medication or a placebo is not important. In health care, clinical trials are conducted to allow safety and efficacy data to be collected for new drugs or devices. These trials can only take place once satisfactory information has been gathered on the quality of the product and its non-clinical safety, and Health Authority/Ethics Committee approval is granted in the country where the trial is taking place. Willingness to take that risk for the sake of proper provable medicine is something that can and should be rewarded.

  244. #244 Brian Daniels
    December 15, 2008

    Perhaps not scientific enough (though see Feynman!):

    Lockpicking (all of the below are without a key, obviously):

    I. Have non-destructively opened file-cabinet grade locks.
    II. Have non-destructively opened deadbolt-grade locks.
    III. Have non-destructively opened high-security (Medeco, Chubb, etc.) locks.

    I could see a similar set for safecracking…

  245. #245 Avi Steiner
    December 30, 2008

    How about a “I understand the entire proof of Fermat’s Last Theorem” badge?

  246. #246 Meres
    January 14, 2009

    As a companion to the ‘radioactivity’ badge: has worked with many highly mutagenic chemicals/compounds and has yet to receive superpowers. Or something about carcinogens, anyway.

  247. #247 michael
    January 27, 2009

    How about a badge that represents a level of understanding or ability in your own field which causes others in your field to question your sanity. Must be able to perform demonstration which proves your knowledge/skill and have witnesses refuse to believe you can really do that.

    The badge could be a figure at the top of a mountain. or a stick figure which has two shadows, one a question mark and the other an exclamation point.

    – have invented new equipment in order to further study. Totally new equipment, not simply a cheaper version of something that could be bought.
    – have finished an experiment while bleeding.
    – has invented new math in order to represent data.
    – Has a family member activly supressing science so that the experimenter does not hurt self or others. Usually connected to the work with fire badge and blows stuff up badge.

    And finally

    – superior methodology badge. the scientist is such a craftsman of scientific methodology that they can perform complex math, write programs, perform experiments, teach, or build something which they themselves do not really understand.

  248. #248 Adam
    February 19, 2009

    Make the badges viewable as photos w/ comments on the facebook group page.


  249. #249 Siobhan
    February 20, 2009

    You need a:

    Has shot a monkey with a ketamine dart and then caught it with a sheet when it fell out of the tree badge.

  250. #250 Lauren
    February 20, 2009

    Has unintentionally burned polarisation symbols into one or more fingers.

    Has unintentionally melted the tip off an otherwised good tool.

    Has scared the lab technician using equipment under remote control.

    The steganography award for successfully encoding rude words/limericks/jokes in a paper without being caught.

    Funding awards – Level 1 – Has received funding for research into a good idea.
    Funding awards – Level 2 – Has received funding for research into a bad idea.
    Funding awards – Level 3 – Has received funding for research into a fictional subject.

  251. #251 Sarah
    February 20, 2009

    I need a badge for using science to make something way more complicated than it needs to be. Perhaps worded more elegantly. . .

  252. #252 Jared
    February 22, 2009

    Why not a professional duct taper badge?

  253. #253 Russ
    March 7, 2009

    The “I’ve actually developed a unified field theory, however I’m too xenophobic and socially removed to share with the other physicists” badge. This badge may also apply to cookies.

  254. #254 NV
    March 16, 2009

    The “has frozen stuff just to see what happens” badge (LEVEL IV)
    In which the recipient has frozen something in liquid helium for the sake of scientific curiosity.

  255. #255 SJZ
    March 30, 2009

    The bravery badge:
    recipient has worked on something that frightens other scientists.

    Level 1: No actual additional risk
    Level 2: Additional risk of bodily injury
    Level 3: Additional risk of contraction and death
    Level 4: Unknown additional risk but likely will lead to long painful death.

  256. #256 Martin Wessendorf
    April 18, 2009

    For those who feel they’re above all this, how about the:



    “We don’t need no steenkin’ badges!”

    badge: a picture of a badge with a slash across it. To be bestowed by others.

  257. #257 DLJ
    May 11, 2009

    You should change “Inordinately fond of invertebrate” to the plural. I love quite a few invertebrates, and would find it hard to pick just one.

  258. #258 RAM Maghouin
    May 16, 2009


    The “I’m into telescopes astro” badge (LEVEL V)

    In which friends and the general public know you spend so much time around a telescope that you have one named after you.

  259. #259 RAM Maghouin
    May 16, 2009

    [picture of bookshelf with Roman numeral III]

    Badge name: Shhhh III

    Description: Subject has outrageous knowledge of library workings.

    Can identify Genre, Publisher, Author and (sometimes) Series by ISBN.

  260. #260 marcus rowland
    May 16, 2009

    The “I wrote for New Scientist back when it was a real science magazine” badge.

    The “accidentally immersed a substantial quantity of sodium and lived” badge. Level 1 say 10g or more, level 2 100g or more , level 3 a kilo or more, level 4 would be the freighter that caught fire with drums of sodium in the hold whose crew’s response was to flood the hold…

    The “it blew up in my hand honest guv” badge for chemists who have had things blow up in their hands.

  261. #261 Marcus Rowland
    May 16, 2009

    A couple more

    The “Electrocuted myself and lived FOR SCIENCE!” badge – you accidentally or deliberately got a substantial electric shock (not just static or other low current) without protection while working in science. Level I US mains voltage, level II european mains voltage, level III 1kv and up, level IV lightning / Tesla coil etc.

    The “My sharks have frikkin lasers in their heads” badge for evil geniuses.

    The “We evacuated” badge – for those circumstances where experiments get a little out of hand. Level I is the lab, level II the building, level III a large industrial complex, level IV a city, level V probably needs an “I developed interstellar travel” badge to go with it.

  262. #262 Ashley Creekmore
    June 2, 2009

    How about the
    “Worked with Cyanide and Lived to Tell the Tale” badge
    “Worked with Animal Blood” badge
    “I’ve got dozens of microbes on my desk at work” badge
    “Hard-core Dissector” for those of us who have dissected things with no gloves. Can have varying levels.

    Love the procreation badges.

  263. #263 Anthony Fincher
    June 16, 2009

    A friend of mine qualifies for:

    The “has frozen stuff just to see what happens” badge (LEVEL IV)
    In which the recipient has frozen something in liquid helium for the sake of scientific curiosity.

    Doesn’t get much colder than that.

    He freezes crystals of electrons in intense magnetic fields at very close to absolute zero…

  264. #264 Shawnna
    August 4, 2009

    Monkey Uses Tools Badge: Levels I-X
    Level I: Has successfully used basic hand tools in the name of science. (Hammer, Screwdriver, MultiTool, ruler/measuring tape)
    Level II: Has successfully used basic power tools in the name of science. (Power Drill, Rotary Tool, laser level)
    Level III: Has successfully used specialist hand tools in the name of science. (Dental picks, Precision Screw drivers, hemostats, micrometers)
    Level IV: Has successfully used specialist power tools in the name of science {related to the dental drill badge} (Dental Drill, multimeter, CNC Machine, digital micrometer)
    Level V: Has successfully used extremely powerful/large power tools in the name of science (cranes, High powered Laser Cutters, Backhoes)
    Level VI: Has successfully altered any tools described in Levels I-V in the name of science
    Level VII: Has successfully built own tools after finding all other tools inadequate for your scientific purposes (The LHC Qualifies as an exceptional example)
    Level VIII: Has successfully repaired any altered or created tools broken in the name of science (The LHC Qualifies as an exceptional example)
    Level IX: Has successfully recovered from injury incurred after the usage of altered or created tools in the name of science
    Level X: Have died after the usage of altered or created tools in the name of science (to be awarded postmortem)

  265. #265 Thornhill Dentist
    August 30, 2009

    The Linnaeus Badge

    Level I (written): I can confidently apply the nominative plural and genitive plural forms of Latin nouns to written taxonomic descriptions

    Level II (oral): I incorporate Latin species names into my everyday conversations with no apparent difficulty in pronunciation. In fact, I prefer to use Latin names over common names.

  266. #266 Andrew Lewis
    October 20, 2009

    I work with lasers – Level I (I have 2 working eyes)
    I work with lasers – Level II (I have 1 working eye)
    I work with lasers – Level III (I have 0 working eyes)
    I work with lasers – Level IV (I have deep scars)

    I Smell Danger – Can recognise potentially fatal chemical leaks by smell before automatic detectors.

    I Breathe Acid – For people who have survived a chemical fire with their lungs mostly intact.

  267. #267 Emergency Dental
    January 14, 2010

    A badge for getting an emergency dental root canal.

  268. #268 Jessy
    February 2, 2010

    To go with the paleontologist badge… There needs to be an archaeologist badge that is the dinosaur with the strike through on it. Also, a “I’ve had my field site collapse/cave in on me” badge.

  269. #269 Pat
    January 4, 2012

    I just discovered the site. I realize that you have not made new badges in five years, but I feel compelled to add that there needs to be a “Has done science on all seven continents” badge. I’m not a scientist, but my husband is a far-traveled geologist.

  270. #270 görüntülü sohbet
    June 4, 2012

    Just added this blog to my favorites. I enjoy reading your blogs and hope you keep them coming!

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