So maybe it doesn’t “terrorize” so much as it “fascinates” nerds like us, but nevertheless, a truly bizarre critter has emerged from the depths of the Pacific. Researchers at the Natural Energy Laboratory of Hawaii used a 3,000 foot hose to suck the hapless cephalopod up from the black depths off Keahole Point last week. The slippery subject, which may be an entirely new species, has the body of a squid but the eight suction-cupped arms of an octopus. Octosquid arrived at the surface alive because cephalopods’ bag-like bodies naturally adjust to pressure changes. The two black ratfish that were also sucked up did not fair so well as their air bladders ruptured.. and then octi ate one of them.
University of Hawaii scientists are also interested in the octosquid. “It’s a gorgeous animal,” said Christopher D. Kelley, program biologist for the Hawaii Undersea Research Laboratory. “I want to say I’ve seen one, but I need to pass this one on to an expert for more examination.”
UPDATE: Octosquid Actually “Plain Old Squid”
In a devastating blow to cephalophiliacs everywhere, it turns out that Octosquid was really just a regular old squid from the genus Mastigoteuthis whose long tentacles had been pulled off while being sucked up the pipe. Thanks again to the Star Bulletin for reporting this half-baked story originally and following it up with this total buzz-kill.