Sex Crazed Oysters Transmit Herpes

The French love their raw oysters. In fact, the French consume the most herpes, I mean oysters, per capita in the world; an average of 2kg! That's a lot of raw oyster.

Well the French were horrified to learn last week that their care-free raw oystering lifestyle had finally hit the rocks. 40 to 100 percent of oysters aged 12 to 18 months have died this summer in all but one of the regions breeding beds. After a few weeks of research, French scientists have determined that their oyster population is unhealthy because they have been too well fed, an irony that only French oysters were sophisticated enough to stumble upon.

Give it to me straight doc...

Basically the randy little guys have been devoting so much time and energy to growing their sexual organs, they ignored their immune systems. After the party was over, the young oysters found themselves with a scorching case of Oyster Herpesvirus type 1, or OsHV-1. Unfortunately for the oysters, this strain is fatal, rather than just uncomfortable and embarrassing.

Other factors such as toxic seaweed or another virus, Vibrio Splendidus, may also be contributing, and the French scientists say the investigation is ongoing. More from Reuters.

Parties like this have since gone out of style.