Zooillogix

Cheetah Loose on Delta Flight

* You are now free to be devoured by a cheetah *

From the AP:

ATLANTA – A Delta baggage worker got a bit of a fright when she opened a jetliner’s cargo door and found a cheetah running loose amid the luggage.

Delta spokeswoman Betsy Talton said Friday that two cheetahs were being flown in the cargo area of a passenger flight from Portland, Ore., to Atlanta a day earlier when one escaped from its cage.

Talton said the airline summoned help from an Atlanta zoo but not before the Cheetah had devoured a stewardess and three others that had tried to use plane’s restroom (Zooillogix may or may not have added that last part). Experts rushed to a closed airport hangar and tranquilized both animals and took them back to the zoo.

Talton said the airline is now working to get the big cats back to their owners. She declined to identify the owners, citing Delta’s privacy rules.

The good news for passengers: The cheetah did not damage any of their luggage.

Comments

  1. #1 Elizabeth
    October 31, 2008

    Wow. That cheetah must’ve been really hungry. >.> Honestly, how often does a cheetah get loose in a plane and eat people?

  2. #2 llewelly
    October 31, 2008

    goddamnit. Look what Richard Dawkins has done. Now EVERYBODY is eating people, just ’cause a couple of uppity atheists wanna eat babies.

  3. #3 NoAstronomer
    October 31, 2008

    “The cheetah did not damage any of their luggage.”

    …since their luggage was actually on flight D19 to Chicago. Passengers who were on flight D35 to Denver should however contact Delta as soon as possible.

  4. #4 greg laden
    October 31, 2008

    Handy tip if you are ever in the same confined space with a cheetah: Don’t squat down or bend over. Keep standing all the way up. That keeps you beyond it’s usual prey size and it won’t attack you. Bend down to tie your shoe and it’s curtains.

    I’m sure this is covered in the Baggage Handler’s Training Manual but other people may want to know.

  5. #5 bumblebrain
    October 31, 2008

    Maybe they released it on purpose to catch all the snakes?

  6. #6 Mike Hussein Haubrich
    November 1, 2008

    Wait – the Baggage Handlers have a training manual? Tell me, is it encrypted?

  7. #7 wesele
    November 1, 2008

    I’m sure this is covered in the Baggage Handler’s Training Manual but other people may want to know.

  8. #8 melisa
    November 1, 2008

    oh god. thats awful. XD

  9. #9 Christie
    November 1, 2008

    WOW. I would love to have seen the guy’s face who found the cheetah running loose. I mean, that’s gotta be a gut check moment right there.

  10. #10 Rosel
    November 1, 2008
  11. #11 Fertanish
    November 1, 2008

    Great, now every cheetah in the country is going to get put on the No Fly List.

  12. #12 Natan Slifkin
    November 2, 2008

    Cheetahs are amazing animals but they are far less dangerous than other big cats due to their slender build. However they have been known to slash the faces of people, hence Greg’s sage advice above. I was recently privileged to have a close encounter with a cheetah:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m7Y75OVCGBk
    On the whole, though, I’ve had far more scary experiences with Delta than with cheetahs.

  13. #13 julia goolia
    November 3, 2008

    It’s a damn good thing that cheetah wasn’t a freedom-hating terrorist! We could have had another 9/11 on our hands.

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    September 15, 2009

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    August 15, 2010

    Handy tip if you are ever in the same confined space with a cheetah: Don’t squat down or bend over. Keep standing all the way up. That keeps you beyond it’s usual prey size and it won’t attack you. Bend down to tie your shoe and it’s curtains.

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