A Good Poop

Trouser snakebitten

Rosen T. Penile ulcer from traumatic orogenital contact. Dermatol Online J. 2005 Aug 1;11(2):18.

I love how even something like ‘dude gets his dick bitten by someone and the bite turns into an gross infected sore’ can be transmuted into an almost pleasant and innocuous jargonistic title such as this. I ought to do a whole post on this kind of thing.

Behar DM, Edelshtein S, Ben-Ami H, Mansano R, Edoute Y. Human bite on penile shaft from oral sex as a portal of entry for streptococcal toxic shock syndrome. Isr Med Assoc J. 2000 Dec;2(12):945-7. No abstract available.

Jesus fucking Christ.

Ameh EA, Chirdan LB, Odigie VI. Amputation of the penis by human bite: a case report.
Ann Trop Paediatr. 1999 Mar;19(1):119-20.

Okay, so you’re probably thinking that some lady went a little loco and bit off her husband’s/boyfriend’s dick. As terrible as that sounds, it’s actually even worse. A little kid got his dick bitten off by an insane person! That’s fucked up!

Fiumara NJ, Exner JH. Primary syphilis following a human bite. Sex Transm Dis. 1981 Jan-Mar;8(1):21-2.

Dude was probably all like “You know what? I can deal. It’s not like they bit it off or anything. It’ll heal, and then we’re back in the game! What’s the worst that could happen?” Syphilis, that’s what. Sweet, sweet syphilis.

Rosen T, Conrad N. Genital ulcer caused by human bite to the penis. Sex Transm Dis. 1999 Oct;26(9):527-30.

From the paper: “Human (dick) bite injuries…usually stem from aggressive behaviour, sports, or sexual activity.” This is why I don’t play rugby, folks.

Comments

  1. #1 teacherninja
    March 28, 2008

    This made my whole day.

  2. #2 Aaron Lemur Mintz
    March 28, 2008

    I glanced at the abstract for the last one, and I took the “Human bite injuries…usually..” to not refer to dick bites specifically, but generally bite injuries. That makes it marginally less terrifying.

  3. #3 Scote
    March 28, 2008

    “Lalalalalalalala!!!!!1!!1 Unsubscribe! Unsubscribe! Unsubscribe! Lalalalalalalalalalalalalalala!!!11!!”

  4. #4 factician
    April 10, 2008

    On closer examination (gah!) of the first paper about the bite injury… It’s not a bite. His glans got caught in a prostitute’s braces. Yep, she had braces. And the dude was 72. Gross.

  5. #5 Daniel Long
    April 18, 2008

    Am I the only one who can’t see any pics (either here or on NCBI PubMed web site?

    (And no, I’m not taking votes as to whether this is a tasteful thing to ask for.)

    Just a “yea” or “nae” will do — with instructions, please.

    Pretty please.

    Pretty please with sugar on top …

  6. #6 Traumatic Orogenital Contact: How About No
    August 21, 2008

    The email contact for the author of the first paper is “vampireted@aol.com”. How apropos.

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