Zooillogix

Rumor has it that New Zealand’s colossal squid is a refined killing machine, hunting down prey at lightening speed deep in the murky Antarctic depths. Turns out rumor may be wrong. Scientists working on the largest ever whole specimen of colossal squid have made some curious discoveries. Far from being a fearsome deep sea warrior, this specimen appears to be an overweight blob suited only for floating slowly and pumping out eggs.

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The 1000+ pound squid was hauled in accidentally by a fishing boat last winter. Click here to see our coverage when the story initially aired. These findings are…

…the most revelatory news to come out of the dissection since the research team announced that the squid had “beach ball sized” eyes in April.

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Quoted in Physorg.com, Steve O’Shea, one of the researchers on the project explained, “My research suggests they’re not the T-rex of the sea, they get more docile as they mature, a strange phenomenon that has caught scientists off guard,” adding, “We are looking at something verging on the incredibly bizarre. As she got older she got shorter and broader and was reduced to a giant gelatinous blob, carrying many thousands of eggs.” Hmmm….sounds like your mother. ZING!!!

The most immediate implication of this finding is that Kevin Z will have to readjust his list of the “Awesomest Most Totally Killer Ocean Predators Ever Who Could Fight Dinosaurs and Win If They Wanted To!!!” It’s almost like he’s been living a lie all these years.

Comments

  1. #1 tresmal
    August 23, 2008

    “this specimen appears to be an overweight blob”
    “As she got older she got shorter and broader and was reduced to a giant gelatinous blob”
    So it’s not just us Americans then.

  2. #2 y
    August 23, 2008

    ^^^

    OH MY GOD. That made my day.

  3. #3 julia
    August 25, 2008

    Does the guy really have to be in the pool to perform the necropsy? That makes me just a little queasy.

  4. #4 jives
    August 25, 2008

    Thanks for ruining Jello for me New Zealand.

    Thanks a lot.

  5. #5 Boz
    August 26, 2008

    Wow. Forensic Knowledge on a creature we are just now really coming to understand since they started hauling them up lately. Yeah.

    Well glad to know thats settled. Now wheres my Piltdown Man, coffee mug.

  6. #6 ben
    January 29, 2009

    perhaps the number of collosal squids make them exceptional killers, also by being more docile maybe they work together ?

  7. #7 muhabbet
    March 26, 2009

    thanks..

  8. #8 neon
    April 29, 2009

    The fowledge on a creature we are just now really coming to understand since they started hauling them up lately.

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    February 24, 2010

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  11. #11 New Beginning
    July 5, 2012

    Excellent job! Thx

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    July 7, 2012

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