Killer Colossal Squid Was Just a Blob of Jello

Rumor has it that New Zealand's colossal squid is a refined killing machine, hunting down prey at lightening speed deep in the murky Antarctic depths. Turns out rumor may be wrong. Scientists working on the largest ever whole specimen of colossal squid have made some curious discoveries. Far from being a fearsome deep sea warrior, this specimen appears to be an overweight blob suited only for floating slowly and pumping out eggs.

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The 1000+ pound squid was hauled in accidentally by a fishing boat last winter. Click here to see our coverage when the story initially aired. These findings are...

...the most revelatory news to come out of the dissection since the research team announced that the squid had "beach ball sized" eyes in April.

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Quoted in Physorg.com, Steve O'Shea, one of the researchers on the project explained, "My research suggests they're not the T-rex of the sea, they get more docile as they mature, a strange phenomenon that has caught scientists off guard," adding, "We are looking at something verging on the incredibly bizarre. As she got older she got shorter and broader and was reduced to a giant gelatinous blob, carrying many thousands of eggs." Hmmm....sounds like your mother. ZING!!!

The most immediate implication of this finding is that Kevin Z will have to readjust his list of the "Awesomest Most Totally Killer Ocean Predators Ever Who Could Fight Dinosaurs and Win If They Wanted To!!!" It's almost like he's been living a lie all these years.

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"this specimen appears to be an overweight blob"
"As she got older she got shorter and broader and was reduced to a giant gelatinous blob"
So it's not just us Americans then.

^^^

OH MY GOD. That made my day.

Does the guy really have to be in the pool to perform the necropsy? That makes me just a little queasy.

Wow. Forensic Knowledge on a creature we are just now really coming to understand since they started hauling them up lately. Yeah.

Well glad to know thats settled. Now wheres my Piltdown Man, coffee mug.

perhaps the number of collosal squids make them exceptional killers, also by being more docile maybe they work together ?

The fowledge on a creature we are just now really coming to understand since they started hauling them up lately.