Zooillogix

The Wall Street Journal reported last week that scientists have finally taken my advice and designed a ruthless mosquito-killing laser that could never ever malfunction and target human children by mistake. Former Lawrence Livermore Science Laboratory researchers have created a laser that aims only at female mosquitoes, using parts that they bought on Ebay (not kidding).

Hey, Dr. Strangelove. A little help here?

Lowell Wood, an astrophysicist, is the main force behind the mosquito laser. He was well known for his work on the “Star Wars” defense program of the…

…80′s that sought to shield the U.S. from Soviet missiles with satellites equipped with lasers. He has now turned that very same technology on mankind’s greatest nemesis.

The eventual goal is to create a defense system to stop the spread of malaria, a disease that kills over 1 trillion humans every year***.

The WSJ reported on how the laser in combination with flashlights work when aimed at a fish tank filled with mosquitos:

“To locate individual mosquitoes, light from the flashlights hits the tank across the room, creating tiny mosquito silhouettes on reflective material behind it. The zoom lens picks up the shadows and feeds the data to the computer, which controls the laser and fires it at the bug.”

The computer makes a gunshot noise when the laser scores a direct hit. “We’d be delighted if we destabilize the human-mosquito balance of power,” Jordin Kare, another astrophysicist told the WSJ. Uh…what?

The laser could be used to form a perimeter around a house or village or be outfitted on an unmanned drone that patrolled the sky in a murderous rampage, the scientists are speculating. I would like one implanted in my forehead please.

***Statistics found on Zooillogix are derived from the research of Bleiman & Bleiman Polling and Data Analysis and may not reflect factual representations of the natural world.

Thanks to NVD, my eyes and ears on the streets!

Comments

#1 Matthew Platte
March 24, 2009

You know it’s a good story when you see the words, “…a saucer of goat blood.”
#2 bug_girl
March 24, 2009

I covered this at the bug blog:
http://membracid.wordpress.com/2009/03/17/laser-mosquito-zapper/

Personally, I think right now it’s more hype than reality.
Like, you know….the missile defense system?
#3 EricJuve
March 24, 2009

I have an idea for a bug zapper using lasers. Senda low power laser beam spaced about 1/16 of an inch along the ceiling. This beam is detected and if interrupted, a coaxial beam from an appropriately sized power laser fires and vaporizes whatever critter broke the sensing beam. I check e-bay once in a while to see if there is a cheap power laser available but they are always more than I want to spend. I guess the black line that would eventually form on the ceiling could be a downside, but it would be entertaining if you had enough bugs.
#4 Joannah
March 25, 2009

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#5 milkshake
March 25, 2009

he has to deny them his precious bodily fluids

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N1KvgtEnABY
#6 Doug Alder
March 25, 2009

The comment by osted by: Joannah | March 25, 2009 1:05 AM: is comment spam – posted by a bot not a live person.
#7 Frank Anderson
March 25, 2009

I can’t imagine we will figure out a way anytime soon to zap a nontrivial number of mosquitoes from any distance (while minimizing the death toll of other flying critters) when we still haven’t mastered taking down a single large ICBM that’s moving in a nice, fairly straight path.

But my skepticism does not, in any way, make lasers any less cool.
#8 Anna
March 25, 2009

All I can say is outch!
Anna
#9 Curious
March 26, 2009

And how time until the research team develops one Jehovah´s Witnesses sized zapper?
#10 milkshake
March 26, 2009

you don’t need to zap Jehovists. Just tell them you are a Mormon and they leave you in a hurry; it works every time.
#11 Sarah
April 3, 2009

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Sarah

http://blanket.ws
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