You have two jobs to do:
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In the 2011 census, be sure to tick "no religion" on the form. Don't play games, don't compromise, don't even call yourself a "secular humanist" — you're just diluting the influence of the godless.
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Sign this petition to stop Rupert Murdoch. He's like a parasitic invasive species who will strangle all the native competitors.
See? That's not so hard.
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To my dismay, even after a good night's sleep and a fresh perusal of the paper, after reading both of Greg Laden's thorough articles,
Life is so much more meaningful if you take the time to hunt down and strangle twits who post blather to inappropriate newsgroups.
- Henry Spencer
This is a level of disgusting a cat can only dream of achieving. hagfish defend themselves and hunt with slime. How do they do that?
There's something really notable about this image. Most cartoons feature the octopus as the villain; this one has the cephalopod representing the good guys, the 99%, strangling the villainous mammal. It breaks the stereotype!