Friday Fun: We Don't Need No Steenkin' Social Media Gurus

I chose this one more for the humourous title of the post since the content itself is very seriously intentioned.

I almost see this as a double sequel to both the social media evilness post and to some of my recent ramblings on thought leadership.

The post in question is We Don't Need No Steenkin' Social Media Gurus by York prof Robert Kozinets.

After I had left the stage and assumed a position within the audience, beer in hand, a woman began talking to me in the crowd. Let's call her "Jennifer." Jennifer told me that she knew nothing about social media even a few weeks ago, but that her husband had bought her an iPad for their anniversary and now she was devoting all sorts of time to learning it. She had driven up from Niagara Falls -about a 2-hour drive-in order to see the Social Media Day event.

"I want to become a social media guru," she said to me, with a big, winning, business-y smile.

Gotta tell ya, Jennifer. That's just about the last thing the world needs. That, another horndog politician, and four bucks will get you a Starbucks latte.

*snip*

So please forgive me for being more than a little ticked off at the gathering of "Social Media Gurus" like ants at the proverbial picnic. While this boom is still booming, they will keep swarming. And I feel entitled to spray a little Raid.

As far as I am concerned, if someone comes up and tells you they are a social media guru, they are telling you, essentially, that they have a Facebook and Twitter account, talk about it to their friends and family, and hope to one day cash in on their "spiffy mailing list" of 406 friends and 217 followers. Maybe they have even written one of the 968 popular business press books about social media you can find lying around the shelves of your local bookstore like old remaindered copies of The Celestine Prophesy or The Coming Stock Market Crash of 2003. (emphasis mine. -jd)

Read the whole thing. It's truly wonderful. And the last line is priceless, but I'll leave it to you to discover.

Consider this Part Whatever in my ongoing "making fun of social media/tech mavens" series:

• The Top 10 Types of Douchebags in Tech and How NOT to be one
• Twitter To Add "Elitist" Verification for Higher Ed Big Deals
• 5 Things Serious Tech People Need To Stop Tweeting
• 5 Terms Social Media Douchebags Need To Stop Using
• 5 Signs You're Talking To A Social Media Douchebag
• Entire Facebook Staff Laughs As Man Tightens Privacy Settings
• New Social Networking Site Changing The Way Oh, Christ, Forget It!