Okay, what with the "made in China" phenomenom and the boom in Japanese electronics long before, we are all familiar with bad translations in our product packaging and instructions, but this goes a bit beyond that!
Below are the washing instructions for a pair of jeans my wife bought today. Read carefully!
I think I will suggest the traditional marital roles next time laundry day comes around, because I don't see how I can win with this one!
I once owned a Honda 350 K4 motorcycle. I had occasion to dismantle the engine to clear out the remains of a seized cam chain idler wheel. Most of those (a finely blended rubber/aluminum paste) turned out to have accumulated in the centrifugal oil filter (it did its job admirably, btw, much more economically and clean than a paper filter, and maintained oil flow until it was utterly overwhelmed). The instructions to removing the filter were "beware of cripple". I am still unsure, but I think it was a reference to the compression washer used in its attachment to the crankshaft end.
On the way to that stage of dismantling I had to remove the engine from the frame. I struggled for a good two hours before noticing the way the tech in the illustration was holding the engine. Grab by the cam end covers and lift till the engine hangs loose under gravity. It will then clear the mounting lugs by about 1/8" if you move it exactly horizontally to the left (but place a small stool to receive it first, your right arm is at this point threaded through the frame!). Brilliant design, sorely lacking in telling me about it.
At least I did not have to contend with contradictory instructions like the ones you posted. But the shop manual was full of interesting translations.
I once saw a picture of a Jap tourist with a small child, the child was wearing a tee shirt that had an image of a Koala on it giving the bird (middle finger protruding from a clenched fist) with the words FUCK YOU clearly visable.
Hey, just like AGW denier arguments - totally contradictory. At least we know what Vernon does for a job now.
Maybe if you wash your hand first, it will all make sense.
Or if you can manage to have tea and no tea at the same time...
To spoil the fun a bit, I think I know how the pictured tag came into being. They simply reproduced the entire legend of possible symbols they were given, rather than understanding they were supposed to choose the correct one(s) from the list.
Where were the jeans made? Ah, Google says Dromedar jeans come from Hungary. I'm assuming "ligvid" is "liquid". And seriously, I hope in Hungarian "dromedar" means something entirely unrelated to dromedary (aka Arabian Camel). Cue the Black Eyed Peas - "My humps, my humps ..." I'm not even going to suggest the other jeans-to-camel relation that comes to mind :-) Although apparently that didn't bother these people: http://www.cameljeans.co.uk/
Looks like there's a styleised dromedary at the top of the label (missing it's head in this pic).
In Hungarian, "szia" (pronounced very similarly to seeya) is a typical greeting. Also, at the end of a phone conversation, it is not uncommon for a female to end the conversation with "puszil" which means something like "kisses" but sounds a lot like english "pussy". This dumbfounded me as a child growing up with a Hungarian au pair. I couldn't understand opening a conversation with a salutation and ending it with an insult!
Here in OZ if you want to watch a 3D movie at the cinema you have to wear these glasses that look like the ones Clark Kent used to wear.
They come in a plastic bag complete with instructions on how to use and a list of safety precautions, one of the precautions is not to wear the glasses outside and look at the sun because you will go blind.
When you see an Asian tourist wearing them on a cloudless 28 degree day you know they cannot read English.
I don't see how I can win with this one
You also cannot lose.
(OT)"New findings could sway thought on climate change"
In other words, we will get a much more detailed picture of the consequences of massive CO2 release by comparing with the situation 56 million years ago.