A double dose of...

...Eneman!

I was remiss in July. It happens that I totally forgot to post the monthly feature that has become a tradition over the last two years of blogging. Oh, I tried to make up for it by resurrecting a rather amusing EneMan article from nearly two years ago as an installment of Your Friday Dose of Woo when I didn't have time to come up with new material.

What I can't figure out is this: If EneMan is so busy being the industrious and hard-working student, where does he get the time to do all this extracurricular stuff?

i-6688318b8bd9722df676bf545edcd270-EneMan 200707.jpg

JULY 2007

I have to say, I'd be pretty scared if I saw a 6 foot running enema bottle running towards me.

i-cfc203881c27256ff3a53bdc93e7e38d-EneMan 200708.jpg

AUGUST 2007

Once again, as always, EneMan seems to get all the chicks. I shudder to speculate on the reason why.

More like this

I'd be pretty scared if I saw a 6 foot running enema bottle running towards me.

Even if there were a herd(? hoard? gaggle? gossip?) of attractive ladies in hot pursuit? I mean, you might get lucky...

...and find out what our hero has that Orac apparently, er, lacks.

For your next Dose of Woo, I wonder if EneMan would be interested in getting together with "The Biggest Douche in the Universe" (look into South Park if you fail to get the reference). If nothing else, it would be a great Photoshop opportunity.

Give thevirgincoconutoil.com a look. This probably isn't Eneman's turf, but it's some fun woo none the less.

"Because of the great number of diseases that can be treated using virgin coconut oil, it will not be a surprise if it becomes the medicine of future generation. There may come a time when virgin coconut oil will be the sole medicine every human being will need."

"Virgin coconut oil can also treat diseases that are usually considered incurable. Regular consumption of coconut oil greatly improves the immune system so it can be the miracle cure for cancer and AIDS patients."

And to think, I was wasting coconuts on Pina Coladas.

Ok, I think I have your answer. Eneman has a certain pull on children, especially little boys. Little boys are really cute, total chick magnets (trust me, if I was single, my five year old would totally get me chicks - without any prompting by me). It's obvious that Eneman hangs out with children, apparently hoards of them sometimes - thus, the chicks really dig Eneman. Still kind of creepy, but in a roundabout way.

Though that doesn't explain what he does with them when he gets them alone. . .

How does coconut oil lose its virginity?

Does this connect in some unthinkable way with Eneman's success as a chick magnet?

I think I'll go think about something else.

How does Eneman get all the chicks? To quote Henry Kissinger, "Power" -- maning political power -- "is the Ultimate Aphrodisiac." And that is something Eneman obviously has.

Think about it. The Signers of the Declaration get one holiday to share between themselves -- and the 55 who wrote the Constitution get none.

The northern First Settlers get one -- and nothing for John Smith and his crew.

Even Jesus Christ gets only one day -- and Joe Smith, Mohammed and the Buddha go begging.

Lincoln and Washington have to share one day -- Jefferson and FDR go unhonored.

No Supreme Court Justice gets a day, no Congressman or Senator.

There's not even a thought to celebrating such Great Americans as Rex Stout, Robert Heinlein, the Marx Brothers or Babe Ruth officially.

But every year, at least here in NYC we celebrate

FLEET WEEK

Now THAT'S power.

I think the girls are there because the photos are taken near EneMan's home in the San Fernando Valley of California.