Calling all jokers

The Wordburst feature on the Scienceblogs main page sometimes comes up with strange combinations: right now the words of the day are "stupider", "breasts", "Deepak Chopra", "Fisking", and "ingest". One of those other science sites, Element List, is picking on us by running a contest…a contest to write a science joke using those five terms. Go ahead, make fun of us. Win a prize.

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"Deepak Chopra" and "fisking" go together quite naturally. After that it gets a bit tougher. Suppose he "ingested" some fine ayurvedic herbs that made him even "stupider" and caused him to grow man "breasts"?

Here's what I posted over there (awaiting approval). It's not good, but then, consider the raw material.

Deepak Chopra walks into a bar, a copy of Ageless Body, Timeless Mind pressed close to his breasts. "I'm looking for the ultimate spiritual high," he says. "I want to ingest a beverage that will enlighten, and yet not make me stupider, like alcohol. Got anything... quantum?"

Puzzled, the barkeep turns to a bearded blogger at the end of the bar. "Hey scientist," he says, "what can I give this guy that'll knock him out and simultaneously enlighten?"

"Dunno," says the blogger. "How about a Fisking?"

Fisking Deepak Chopra is stupider than a nun with fake breasts, even "ingest."

Fisking Deepak Chopra's woo is stupider than orally ingesting your poo. To hell with the breasts.

Ingest some stupider fisking breasts. And now for the joke: Deepak Chopra.

Congrats, Tatarize, you're the first one in a loooong time to make me spit out my beverage. Thankfully I was able to open my mouth before the chocolate malt went out my nose instead!

Deepak Chopra
Appears on Oprah
Hardly risking a fisking by insisting
That happy, blissful thought arrests
Your aging, keeps you slim
Through all the junk food one ingests
And also gives you perfect breasts!

Does he think folks will swallow that?
This Ayurvedic fogey -
Stupider than the average yogi