Did the earth move for you, too?

So it really does cause earthquakes!

"Many women who do not dress modestly … lead young men astray, corrupt their chastity and spread adultery in society, which (consequently) increases earthquakes," Hojatoleslam Kazem Sedighi was quoted as saying by Iranian media. Sedighi is Tehran's acting Friday prayer leader.

Suddenly, I feel exposed and embarrassed — not much action going on in Minnesota, I guess, while California and Japan are getting jiggy all the time. And oh boy, Iceland — was everyone getting wild there, or what?

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Today I wore a bikini for science. Last week, Hojatoleslam Kazem Sedighi, Tehran's acting Friday prayer leader was quoted as saying : "Many women who do not dress modestly ... lead young men astray, corrupt their chastity and spread adultery in society, which (consequently) increases…
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Indonesia, despite being mostly Muslim, is clearly the adultery capital of the world.

Hmmm...Iran is in an earthquake zone and has had a lot damage from them. Iran also requires women to dress modestly. So who does Sedighi think is causing Iranian tremors?

If you're out there SC: post that RuPaul comment again, and see if it flies this time ;D

And oh boy, Iceland — was everyone getting wild there, or what?

Yes, but I'd rather not talk about it.

By Reginald Selkirk (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Well, he didn't actually say anything about volcanoes. Those are caused by looking at feelthy peectures.

By cervantes (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Iceland? Volcanoes are caused by Socialism, everybody knows that.

Jadehawk, USGS has a few earthquakes on record for North Dakota. Example.
So that wkikiansswers article you link to is wrong.

Well, Mr “Earthquake” Sedighi did not say (in the quote poopyhead quoted) that the location (spatial or temporal) was directly related to the ladies and men they lead astray, so it could be the case Iceland's current georanting is caused by a bunch of randy ape proto-persons dancing around a monolith…

I wonder if spreading and convergent zones also cause women to dress immodestly, explaining the odd coincidence of earthquakes and plate activity.

Or are we just wrong to suppose that geological explanations have anything to do with earthquakes at all?

Glen D
http://tinyurl.com/mxaa3p

By Glen Davidson (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Many women who do not dress modestly … lead young men astray, corrupt their chastity and spread adultery in society,

Right. As opposed to young men who just go ahead and do whatever the fuck they want and suffer no consequences for it because shitheads like Sedickhead keep telling them it's da wimminz's fault.

By alysonmiers (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Jadehawk, USGS has a few earthquakes on record for North Dakota. Example.
So that wkikiansswers article you link to is wrong.

pfft, way to ruin a perfectly good joke with stoopid facts.

By Jadehawk, OM (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

@llewelly#8

I blame the Creature Parka.

The Sedighi hypothesis stands.

Then again, maybe living in earthquake zones causes immodest dress.

By jidashdee (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Well, it is true that women in California tend to dress more immodestly than those in Minnesota. Particularly in winter, spring, and fall.

By NitricAcid (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

I thought Deepak Chopra's meditation was the cause of earthquakes?

By Celtic_Evolution (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Immodestly-dressed women cause Deepak Chopra to "meditate".

By NitricAcid (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Fred Phelps' philosophical doppelganger? Scary.

By Egg Fu Laura (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

It´s amusing to see all the retarded conservative christians getting their hackles up in the Yahoo news comments. There´s quite some talk about the US turning into a communist dictatorship. I know I´m only and Old European, but did I miss something there?

By Psychodigger (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

I just saw in the Danish newspaper Politiken (in Danish only, and warning: contains an obscene image) that according to Rush Limbaugh the Eyjafjallajökull eruption is God's punishment for Obama's healthcare reform. God has really lousy aim.

BEDEMIR: And that, my liege, is how we know the Earth to be banana-shaped.

ARTHUR: This new learning amazes me, Sir Bedemir. Explain again how sheeps' bladders may be employed to prevent earthquakes.

BEDEMIR: Oh, certainly, sir.

By bradkhall (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Wasn't aware Pat Robertson had relatives in Iran!

You should the orgies going on here in California.

By jcmartz.myopenid.com (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Surveys have shown that New Zealand women are the sluttiest on Earth.

So there must be something in it.

An Icelandic acquaintance once described Icelandic activities to me: "In the summer, there is hiking and f*cking. In winter, there is no hiking".
Sounds like they were due for a smiting!

Iceland — was everyone getting wild there, or what?

What happens in Iceland stays in Iceland.

By Doug Little (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Rush Limbaugh [said] the Eyjafjallajökull eruption is God's punishment for Obama's healthcare reform.

A primary source for this would be useful. I read this claim somewhere yesterday (also unsourced (as I recall)), and am sceptical. Some trivial Generalissimo Google™ searching suggests the original was some satire:

GOPrincess Ann Coulter has blamed the volcanic eruption on the Democratic led congress. Rush Limbaugh agrees with her. Bill O'Reilly agrees with Rush. And Sean Hannity agrees with Bill.

Not quite the same, but it's easy to imagine how it could mutate.

I was in Iceland 2 weeks before the eruption (I swear it isn't my fault!) and I didn't see any scantily clad folks (male or female). Although, considering it was cold as hell and snowing all three days, I guess that isn't a surprise!

Maybe Deepak Chopra had a really big sneeze or something?

By https://me.yah… (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

God only employs geological disasters like earthquakes and volcanoes in areas with active fault lines. He uses mudslides in places where development has left the land without root systems to hold things together. He sends fires to dry areas with frequent thunder storms, and he uses hurricanes on warm, coastal areas. Now, areas with the greatest concentrations of godless liberals, who we all know are secretly Satan worshipers, God chooses to punish them by making them stand back and watch in horror as all of this happens everywhere else. (I'm looking at you, New England.)

By jackal.eyes (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

I thought Deepak Chopra's meditation was the cause of earthquakes?

Tsk. Stop thinking like a scientist. God is a metaphor. Earthquakes are a metaphor. Deepak Chopra is a metaphor. The important thing to realise out of all of this is that atheists are wrong, somehow.*

(*Sorry for that. I'm looking to change careers and hoping I can get a cushy job writing HuffPo articles in between bong hits, so I've gotta practice my inanity.)

By Brownian, OM (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Oh, couldn't these religious nut cases for once agree on something?!

I thought it was established, once and for all, that earthquakes are caused by gays... and atheists... Not that I like it (it makes me twice as guilty as most others after all), but facts are facts and have to be accepted whether one likes them or not. Right?

By Armand K. (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

@NitricAcid#17

Immodestly-dressed women cause Deepak Chopra to "meditate".

Zingah!

But, you might want to check with old Rita Chopra on that one. Deepak's been registering on gaydar for quite a while.

By jidashdee (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Not much action in the United Kingdom either, but it is a well established fact that we would rather have a cup of tea.

Rush Limbaugh [said] the Eyjafjallajökull eruption is God's punishment for Obama's healthcare reform.

A primary source for this would be useful. I read this claim somewhere yesterday… and am sceptical.

Wow! It looks like he did. Here is a link to the video and a (partial) transcript. I haven't listened to the video (I get an irresistible urge to punch my monitor everytime I hear the nitwit's voice), but the transcript says (my emboldening):

You know, a couple of days after the health care bill had been signed into law, Obama ran around all over the country saying, "Hey, you know, I'm looking around. The earth hadn't opened up. No Armageddon out there. The birds are still chirping." I think the earth has opened up. God may have replied. This volcano in Iceland has grounded more airplanes - airspace has more affected - than even after 9/11 because of this plume, because of this ash cloud over Northern and Western Europe. ... It's got everybody just in a shutdown. Earth has opened up. I don't know whether it's a rebirth or Armageddon. Hopefully it's a rebirth, God speaking....

I'm off now to eat my hat for dinner. It's leather, I'll try to pretend it's bacon.

No. Sedighi is wrong. I have a theory that Islam causes volcanoes:

Evidence?

Which country has the highest Muslim population?
Which country has the largest number of active volcanoes?

INDONESIA!
(202 million. 12.9% of the the world's Muslims, 16% of the Earth's 850 active volcanoes*.)

Coincidence? I think not.

(* On land. There are more active volcanoes under water!)

Is everyone sure that it is not His Noodly Appendage&trade that has touched Iceland and it is in fact a beer volcano that has erupted. I waiting for reports of a stripper factory to spontaneously pop into existence anytime soon. There must be lots of pirates up there to have received such a blessing from his Noodlyness. Ramen.

By Doug Little (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

I've gotta practice my inanity.

Um, no? Your inanity is fine. It's your sanity we wonder about…  ;-)

Hmm... I wonder what the east coast was doing that one time it had an earthquake.

By NixNoctua (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

I['m] waiting for reports of a stripper factory to spontaneously pop into existence anytime soon.

Well, I am wondering what sort of movie they are filming in the upstairs apartment…

Brownian, OM -

(*Sorry for that. I'm looking to change careers and hoping I can get a cushy job writing HuffPo articles in between bong hits, so I've gotta practice my inanity.)

Pfffft... are you kidding me? You didn't even use the word "quantum" once.

Amateur.

By Celtic_Evolution (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Hey, the accuracy of the big guy's aim is apocryphal.

Given the extent of the universe, of course, it's reasonably impressive for him to be hitting the correct planet.

@ Glen D. @ 10

Uhhhh...huh-huh. You said, "spreading and convergent zones." Uhh huh-huh.

By Everyday Atheist (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

#35: I found that link too. Only, I've never actually heard Rush Limbaugh "speak" (for lack of a better word), so I couldn't tell if it was him.

I guess it's possible that God woke up, saw the healthcare bill being passed, and decided to punish those who have had free healthcare for 50 years. God really doesn't come off very well when described by these loons.

Yeah, but you would never dare say that about musli... oh.

By Gregory Greenwood (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

This Hojatoleslam Kazem Sedighi chap's 'logic' is depressingly familiar. Everything is, of course, the fault of those temptress vixens. Corrupting poor innocent young men. Leading the little lambs astray. And causing earthquakes. Because Allah is weird that way...or something. The idea that the men should demonstrate some modicum of self control (not to mention that there is no causative link between culturally specific concepts of immorality and earthquakes) is completely alien to him.

With mindless misogyny so inground into some Islamic cultures I fear that it will be several decades before women enjoy anything approaching the tiniest fragment of respect, let alone equal rights, in the Islamic world.

By Gregory Greenwood (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Why don't you ever make fun of /autocomplete snark

By mattheath (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Iceland is the home of the Huldufólk: sex elves that live out in the wilderness and "visit" women camping alone. Which explains all the geothermal activity.

By https://www.go… (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Just love the results of Google translate on that Danish article about Limbaugh's latest idiocy.

God is angry with President Barack Obama. Hence the volcanoes in Iceland.

Fairly such reads the short version of the long flow of words, which yesterday ran out of the mouth from the right-wing American radio host Rush Limbaugh.

According to radio host raging god of the American president's healthcare reform, which last month signed for the 32 million Americans without health insurance.

Further down, we find this:

His political comments and messages sneaks out to 10-20 million Americans, and thus he is one of the most intercepted radio hosts.

He is also well-paid. Rush Limbaugh is believed to raise over 30 million dollars a year (178 million dollars).

Comedy gold, I think.

By JohnnieCanuck (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

PZ, awesome Hemingway reference in the post title there. I just read For Whom the Bell Tolls, and already I'm running into a reference that would've completely escaped me without notice three weeks ago.

By cydeweys.myope… (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

First, Haiti. (Chopra will have to give up his claim now.)

Now, Iceland.

What next? Superhurricanes taking out New York City?

...and does anyone really believe Pillhead Limbaugh??

By Givesgoodemail (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Well, Iceland does have a lesbian Prime Minister. If a lack of modesty causes earthquakes, does homosexuality cause volcanic eruptions?

So, huge masses of the earth's crust jostle each other around more or less, depending on whether the local tribe of hairless apes requires the ones without dangly bits to wear a bag over their head?

Teh stoopid! It burns!

By Rick Miller (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

I'm waaaay late to this party. Bradkhall #21 beat me to the solution. WJS

By https://me.yah… (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Iceland outlawed strip shows last month.

Coincidence?

I think not!

They were too late to stop Eyjafjallajökull, but at least they may prevent Katla from screwing us all!

By Arancaytar (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

The Big Guy In The Sky has an unhealthy interest in sex.

By 'Tis Himself, OM (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Rick Miller @53 wins the Perspective Award.

By kilternkafuffle (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

New Zealand is often referred to as "the Shaky Isles".

[Buffs fingernails modestly]

By phoenicianromans (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Iceland outlawed strip shows last month.

Right. No stripper factories. That ruins the hypothesis it's a beer volcano.

More wishful thinking destroyed by cold, hard science.

Those Vikings love a good party, but nothing seems to happen in Denmark and Norway; maybe the Icelandic Vikings have a special portal to a different world?

Has there been a major earthquake in Iran recently? Earthquakes should be pretty common in that part of the world; maybe the loon was just trying to scare women into hiding themselves better. I imagine Allah looking down and going "shit! those butt-ugly bitches aren't covering up again! RRRRaaaaar! Time to kill off a few of them with an earthquake - how many times have I got to tell them I don't want to see their ugly bodies!" Gee, and I'm the one who gets into trouble for saying things like "yeah, of course that one makes you look fat - they all do".

By MadScientist (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

How's this for a solution to Mr. Sedighi's problem. First let him contribute to a sperm bank so that he can have children. Then castrate him to help him control his vile urges. Then voila! no volcanos.

What geological disaster is associated with men dressing immodestly?

By dreamfish.org.uk (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

No wonder men in those countries have to keep women so subjugated - turns out the very existence of vaginas is powerful enough to keep all European airspace shut down for days.

Halter top season is ten months long in Houston and there are no earthquakes at all. We must be too far from the tectonic hot pants.

By scooterKPFT (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

blf

I'm off now to eat my hat for dinner. It's leather, I'll try to pretend it's bacon.

I can't eat bacon while Rush Limbaugh is talking, it makes me feel icky and cannibally.

By scooterKPFT (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Come now, California makes PERFECT sense. They have San Francisco!

By pnrjulius (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

I don't fucking get it. Seriously. Explain this one to me.

On one hand we have these misogynistic, alpha-male wankers, who quite literally believe that men are superior to women in every way possible, and that a womans singular purpose on this planet is to serve man for all eternity (Genesis 3:16 et.al.).

For some reason members of this allegedly superior sex are easily lead astray by "women who do not dress modestly", which by Iranian standards means dressing like a Ninja, and not in the good way.

Al this of course spurred on by an ancient, omnipotent, omnipresent, omniscient and infallible being, who for some reason fucked up hilariously and repeatedly. If I was an old testament god and someone had written the expose on my stupidity and clumsiness that is the holy texts of the Abrahamic traditions, there would be divine retribution, like you would not believe!

Parasites, latching onto instances of human tragedy to hijack reason and further their own selfish agendas.

Many women who do not dress modestly … lead young men astray, corrupt their chastity and spread adultery in society,

So then, mandatory estrogen patches for the young men of Iran as an earthquake-prevention measure?

I see dollar signs and an opportunity for real estate development and revitalization. Forget building demolition --bring on the whores. Earthquakes on demand, a new business for the new millennium.

By thedarwinreport (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Aww darn it. I guess us people in the netherlands are just a bunch of prudes then, despite all the wonderful stuff o'reilly has managed to say about one of our cities.

Maybe the previous generations were doing better than us?
Or do floods not count?

By Haruhiist (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Adelaide, Australia had a teeny-tiny earthquake the other day.

(3.8, rattled the windows for about 10 seconds, could have been mistaken for a very loud truck or unnaturally long thunder)

I suppose it must have been caused by women wearing skirts above the knee or something.

To #48--Wow. I've never thought much of camping before. But suddenly I have the urge to buy a tent and a backpack and head for Iceland. :)

By Marie the Bookwyrm (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

What happens in Iceland stays in Iceland.

Continental Europe wishes.

By BigMKnows (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

@69
brilliant.

By Egg Fu Laura (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

If god had any sense of irony, there'd be a volcano under the Vatican.

Seriously, vagina-worship has got to stop. There's nothing "special" or "magical" or "holy" that needs "protecting" or "saving" and that needs to stay "pure and chaste" down there. It's a weird little hole that has its own Ph balance. Take it easy, mullahs, priests, and rabbis.Just take it easy.

tectonic hot pants

Where does one buy these? Are they only for youngish women, or can anyone wear them, even chubby middle aged types?

Seriously, vagina-worship has got to stop.

I'm not so sure it's worship, exactly. Worship might actually be a step up from the present paranoid weirdness and geologic instability.

Kinsey (in the 2004 biopic of the same name) ascribes a very similar statement to his incredible prig of a father, to lampoon him.

@ 79

Seriously, vagina-worship has got to stop.
I'm not so sure it's worship, exactly. Worship might actually be a step up from the present paranoid weirdness and geologic instability.

In terms of this discussion I believe we should all think of the vagina as a volcano.

Vulvas, vaginas, volcanos

remarkable ontological alliteration, proves the existence of god for sure.

Take my word for it

By scooterKPFT (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Well, Iceland is... Iceland.

Other countries have female singers and detective movies.

Iceland has Bjork and Jar City.

(If you haven't seen Jar City, let's just say that it's the only crime movie I know in which you're already freaked out when the cop is just having dinner at home and chatting. His favorite dish, apparently, is mutton head).

By christophe-thi… (not verified) on 19 Apr 2010 #permalink

Posted by: cervantes Author Profile Page | April 19, 2010 3:25 PM

Well, he didn't actually say anything about volcanoes. Those are caused by looking at feelthy peectures.

The eruptions you get from that are not --repeat, not-- vulcanoes.
But it might feel that way.

scooterKPFT you forgot Vulvania, Dr. Phibes' assistant.

By John Morales (not verified) on 20 Apr 2010 #permalink
tectonic hot pants

Where does one buy these? Are they only for youngish women, or can anyone wear them, even chubby middle aged types?

They're only for the true fashion plate.

(Sorry.)

In terms of this discussion I believe we should all think of the vagina as a volcano.

Which is better than thinking of the vagina as a sheath, ie something you store a sword in when you're not using it in order to keep it/you safe.

That's where the word comes from apparently, the Latin word for sheath.

I'm not sure what the sword is supposed to represent, but if it's what I believe it does, here's one good example of misogynistic etymology.

By negentropyeater (not verified) on 20 Apr 2010 #permalink

Friendly greetings from Belgium... you know, that flat country that along with The Netherlands has legal marriage for same-sex couples, women walking around wearing what they jolly well wish, the occasional nude beach, legal prostitution and pornography and very nice poster campaigns for the latest lingerie or swimwear line.

Last time we had a tremor (I wouldn't even call it an earthquake) here is more than a decade ago and papers were going on for days about the "tens of thousands of Euros in property damage" (you know, loose tiles and such)

By gravendeel (not verified) on 20 Apr 2010 #permalink

so, we're almost at 100 comments and no one used the word 'subduction'? what's the matter with you people?

By jimtobias (not verified) on 20 Apr 2010 #permalink

I am god. I caused the volcano with my rage. How dare you doubt me. Haven't you seen x-files?

I don't want or need your "health" care -- which is mostly a scam to make me pay the "medical" bills for obese should've-died-long-ago morons who spend their lived inflaming their arteries with toxic fats and sugars, rotting their livers with ethyl alcohol and breaking their bones while engaging in reckless, environmentally hazardous motorsports. What really enraged me was the claim that forcing 32 million people to buy health insurance was a gift to those of us who will now be thrown in prison -- along with thousands of others already there for (ironically) distributing the very same drugs doctors require some children to take -- for refusing to buy this so-called "health" insurance.

You betcha I'm so pissed the earth shook and we shut down the skies over Europe.

By toodleedoo (not verified) on 20 Apr 2010 #permalink

JohnM55 @ 34

Not much action in the United Kingdom either, but it is a well established fact that we would rather have a cup of tea.

Drinking tea - which is addictive, since it contains caffeine - causes floods. Everyone knows that.

Friendly greetings from Belgium

You'll have to do much better than that to win a Rory Award.

Subduction. There. I used the word. Impressions in the jungle soil are caused by elephants feet. Why do elephants move their feet? Are elephants sentient?

Magnetic resonance. There. I used the word. Just because it is fun to use. Non-equilibrium dynamics of disordered electrons. Used that word to, too.

What caused the big bang. There. I asked that question, just because it is fun to ask. T-6. There. I used that collection of letters. Just because they are fun to use, and because I got a wrong-number phone call from near there. Which qualified me for a peak from DHS. Surely they have better things to do than concern themselves over the flavor of my jesting. No? And surely I jest? No?

By toodleedoo (not verified) on 20 Apr 2010 #permalink

Earthquakes ! - no prob. Just employ a few sheeps bladders. Works every time.

Iceland obviously got the treatment because of their heinous attitude to allowing dragon-riding!

I'm not sure which breed causes the largest earthquake, however... ;)

#89 jimtobias

so, we're almost at 100 comments and no one used the word 'subduction'? what's the matter with you people?

Au contraire. Well done you people!!

For Iceland constructive (or divergent) plate boundary would be correct - subduction occurs elsewhere.

#96 danielm

Reliable sources are difficult to find for dragons, partly because field work is considered particularly difficult. Some of the few useful sources are the extensive papers by Rowley:

"I don't envy the one who gets the Horntail. Vicious thing. Its back end's as dangerous as its front."

(Charlie Weasley about the first challenge of the Triwizard Tournament.)

The Hungarian Horntail is a dragon native to Hungary and is considered to be the most dangerous dragon breed ... Horntails are also known for being one of the most vicious breeds of dragon; even Rubeus Hagrid commented on their ferocity.

Unfortunately, no mention of earthquakes ...