Lies and the Lying Liars that Tell Them

This post is a bitch-fest. Don't read any further if you have no interest in hearing me complain. The only reason I'm posting this is because I figure some of the people who read this blog find themselves in the same boat as me.

This summer, I will be attending the Society for the Study of Evolution annual meeting for the first time. I figured the meeting is in Long Island, New York so I may as well check it out when it's in my neck of the woods (last year it was in Alaska and next year it will be in New Zealand). The Evolution Meeting has a reputation of being less work and more play than your average professional meeting. For that reason, and because my research doesn't jive that well with the stuff that gets published in Evolution, I thought there could be more productive (and more destructive) ways for me to spend my money.

Anyway, I decided to give the Evolution Meeting a shot this year. Find out why this may have been a mistake below the fold.

I registered for the meeting in time to submit a talk (ie, prior to the April 15 deadline). The meeting was still over two months away. I was in no rush to arrange my housing accommodations, especially considering the following was on the meeting webpage:

Conference Housing accommodations are located in the air-conditioned Residence Halls in Roth Quad with overflow in Tabler Quad.

. . .

Once the rooms in Roth Quad are full, rooms in Tabler Quad will then be assigned. Rooms in Tabler Quad are slightly lower in cost but do not provide air conditioning (they do provide a fan). The temperature in Stony Brook during late June is usually moderate, but it may be hot. We expect these two dorms to have a sufficient capacity to accomodate [sic] everyone who wishs [sic] to stay on-campus.

I was like, guaranteed housing. No rush, no hurry. When I tried to sign up for on campus housing at the end of April -- a full two months prior to the meeting -- this was posted on the webpage:

Campus housing registration is now closed but we are trying to arrange for additional rooms. Contact us (sse2006@life.bio.sunysb.edu) about a waiting list for double rooms.

So, I'm like, this is bullshit. You don't tell people that on campus housing is guaranteed and then tell them that they can't get on campus housing. Especially when the conference is in the middle of nowhere. I gathered up some of the other folks and we made reservations at the closest hotel to campus. This hotel happens to be four miles away.

I then put myself on the wait list for on campus housing. I had my fingers crossed, but then I got this email:

We regret to inform you that we are unable to provide you with on-campus housing for the SSE 2006 meetings due to the extremely large number of attendees at this year's meeting. We apologize for any inconvenience this may have caused.

Asshats! Instead of being able to walk from the dorm to the conference we're gonna have to drive. This is a big ol' pain in the ass. With a hat on. Hence the term "asshat". What have we learned?

• Don't schedule a conference at a university with no hotels within walking distance.
• Don't schedule a conference at a small university without much on campus housing.
• Don't guaranty on campus housing at your small university without nearby hotels as a backup plan.

P.S. Apparently the dorms got over booked because the conference organizers assumed that most people would reserve rooms with a roommate. Well, most people reserved rooms without a roommate. That meant they had half as many rooms available as planned. And that's why I'm staying way too far from the campus.