I especially like the first one.
I have posted this sort of thing before, but for those not in the know Bryan and John are sort of stand up comedians and regularily take the piss out out of politics and political issues. Here is their latest effort.
Note: Penny Wong is our climate change minister.
[John and Bryan are in the studio after the show. Feet on the table, ties off and waxing philosophical over a beer or three.]
Bryan: â¦.And thatâs why Peter Garrettâs job is a safe as houses.
[There is an awkward silence.]
John: [Changing subject] I see Pennyâs in the news again.
John: Got up on her hind legs and went into bat for the climate scientists. Theyâre not coping well with the skeptics.
Bryan: Inquisitive types, arenât they?
John: True, Bryan. But itâs a given that the weatherologists have been taking a bit of stick lately. Look at Al Goreâ¦
Bryan: Brilliant scientist. Did a movie.
John: Say no more Bryan. But nevertheless pilloried by the skeptics on a simple matter of interpretation.
Bryan: How so?
John: He only tried to say that sea levels would rise by 6 inches â suddenly there was this communication problem, and somehow the public gets the idea he said 20 feetâ¦
Bryan: Clearly misquoted.
John: In his own movie.
Bryan: You canât be too careful John.
John: And Professor Pachauri. Heâs just at home, doing his taxâ¦
Bryan: As you do.
John: As you do Bryan, and making a very earnest attempt to declare a net income of 3 million. Butâ¦
John: Owing to a typographical tragedy, he only managed to put himself down for 30 grand that year.
Bryan: Missed off a couple of zeros?
John: Whatâs a couple of zeros?
John: Nothing at all Bryan. Not that youâd ever guess it but. The critics went off like a pork chop â just like they did with that glacier business.
Bryan: What was that?
John: Well, the good Professor had just finished informing the Indian Government they had about 30 years to find themselves a new set of Himalayan glaciersâ¦
John: And that they were a collective pack of duds, Bryan. When a quick glance at the notes revealed that the existing glaciers would be in the hands of the said government sometime north of the year two thousand and never.
Bryan: At least he got the thousand bit right.
John: Despite this, the gratitude of the Indian Government was distinctly underwhelming. And as a token of their appreciation, I now believe heâs about to be given the Khyber Pass.
Bryan: Khyber Pass?
John: Home of the Vegemite Valley Bryan.
Bryan: Not good.
John: A little like Professor Jones. Doing a little spring clean around the climate laboratory one day, when he inadvertently discards the greater part of the 20th century temperature record.
Bryan: Desperately unlucky, John. A brilliant scientist but.
John: Just not very well equipped for the collection, retention, analysis and reporting of large data sets Bryan.
Bryan: No-oneâs perfectâ¦
John: Quite true Bryan. So you can see where Penny is going with this Bryan.
Bryan: Yep, thereâs nothing wrong with the Climate Science.
John: Itâs only the numbers that are dodgey.
crakar: I suspect that's not actually a skit that Clarke and Dawe performed. Unless you've got a source I can't find, you're attributing something to them that they never said. Though that would be right in line with the general tactics we see.
...and a quick google finds it on JoNova.
"Speedy" says in comment #109: " Hereâs one I knocked up at lunchtime â a bit rough but itâs vaguely on thread!"