The Eohip and Doclodip

In the course of rooting through the literature for more information on Eohippus, Hyracotherium, and the various associated genera (it's been a chore to find out their names, much less the relevant papers!) I stumbled across this 1927 poem by Richard Ashman, published in The Science News-Letter. It is obviously not meant to be accurate, but I have to say that the concluding verses made me laugh.

A sad young Eohippus, once,

Who pattered through the gorse,

Was sobbing as he pattered, for

His fondest hopes were shattered, for

He'd failed in all that mattered, for

He wasn't yet a Horse.




He met a bulky friend of his,

A looming mass of force,

A jaunty Diplodocus

With a yellow, blooming crocus

In his buttonhole, to focus

The public gaze, of course.




"I say, what makes you snivel so,

My little Eohip?

Why all the silly signs of woe?

There's no need to dissemble so!

What makes the tremors tremble so

Upon your lower lip?"




"Oh," cried the wretched Eohip,

"I'm dying from remorse!

Although I've been selected to,

And eagerly expected to,

Perversly I've neglected to

Evolve into a Horse.




"Poor thing!" the Diplodocus laughed,

"You're too unenergetic!

Now, me, I'm on the very brink

Of evolution, which, I think,

Will make these other reptiles shrink

And feel apologetic!




"As you're my friend, and wouldn't say

A word derogatory,

I'll tell you, little Eohip:

I'm going to be a Doclodip;

A great big, hulking Doclodip,

A burly beast of glory!"




As he had said he'd do, he did,

This dinosaur persistent.

But when the Doclodip arrived,

All nature, so it seemed, connived

To see no single bone survived

To prove he'd been existent!




The Eohippus, losing toes,

Because he couldn't add 'em,

No longer patters through the gorse,

For, by a mighty tour-de-force,

He's finally become, a horse,

And gallops on macadam!