Rejection letters always hurt a little, even for Dr. Phil. I'm sure he'll work through it.
Thank you for submitting your application for the director's position at the National Institutes of Health. As the N.I.H. is the principal force guiding America's efforts in medical research, we have strived to consider every candidate's application seriously.
Our first impression was not a good one. You have a loud and exuberant manner that is an oddity in our network of colleagues, and for the duration of the interview process, you were physically sitting on top of Dr. James Watson (a man considerably smaller than you), oblivious to his muffled and strained murmurs beneath you. We found this quite distracting and wonder what this reflects of your character.
Finally, we found your tendency to talk in meaningless, corny phrases very irritating. Responses like "Sometimes you just got to give yourself what you wish someone else would give you" or "You're only lonely if you're not there for you" are very confusing, to say the least. In fact, our members felt that overall you were even more irritating than the applicant who used the word "testicular" 67 times in his interview.
More reasons outlined Letter of Rejection for Dr. Phil, at Yankee Pot Roast. Written by SciBling The World's Fair's David Ng.
Maybe Dr. Phil will take his own advice from the Dr. Phil Random Quote Generator. "You don't need the weight of the world on your shoulders to join the circus."
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Oh man... I just can't stop laughing at that "testicular" part! Touché!