Is there such a thing as a sophisticated pirate joke?

No. I think not.

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Totally off topic, but has anyone recieved their Focus on the Family books yet? Its been longer than the shipping period, but I've recieved nothing. Was it too good to be true?

Haven't received mine either... I would give it, as they say, 4 to 6 weeks.

By speedwell (not verified) on 05 Sep 2006 #permalink

A pirate walks into a bar. The barkeeper is surprised to see a large ship's wheel shoved down his britches. "Do you know you've got a steering wheel in your trousers, sir?" he enquires.

"Yarr," says the pirate, "it's driving me nuts".

I believe this provides a further data point in favour of your assertion.

By Corkscrew (not verified) on 05 Sep 2006 #permalink

A quick trip to Google was disappointing ... I didn't see any geologists with a "Pyrates of the Caribbean" page. (Lots of links to the movie, misspelled, but no rocks.)

Oops, didn't think of the other (and probably proper) spelling ...

So now, I find things like Pyrites of the Caribbean: (USA, 2003) Johnny Depp is dissapointed to discover that Blackbeard's treasure is actually Iron Disulfide. ...

Why are pirates called pirates?

Bacause they 'Arrrrgh'.

By David Hone (not verified) on 05 Sep 2006 #permalink

Check this pirate out.

NSFW warning: The contents of the linked page may change at any time, and is likely to within the next day or two. The site is known for patently NSFW content.

By Magnus Malmborn (not verified) on 05 Sep 2006 #permalink

The first joke my daughter learned to tell:

Q: Why couldn't the pirate go to the movie?

A: Because it was rated aarrrghh...

By George Cauldron (not verified) on 05 Sep 2006 #permalink

The New Yorker had one years ago. In the cartoon, there's a classroom full of small children, and one pirate. The teacher says, "OK class, pi is equal to what squared? Bluebeard, you might know this one."

Sophisticated.

There's always the venerable and widely linked "Pirate Riddles for Sophisticates."

Perhaps we could try to work "Sudo shiver me timbers" into the pirate-joke ouvre. You know, 'cause that sudo joke is so funny and all.

Younger offspring was frolicking about the house pretending to be a dog the other day. "Arf! Arf!"

Mid-frolic, younger offspring picked up a toy hand-hook that had been left on the couch by elder offspring, and switched seemlessly to, "ARRRf! ARRRf!"

They start young, these scurvy dogs.

What does a pirate chant when he is meditating?

"Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh"

By BlueIndependent (not verified) on 05 Sep 2006 #permalink

To answer the James Dobson question-

"Unfortunately, there is currently a coordinated effort in the marketplace to abuse Focus on the Family's benevolent practices. Let me also assure you that we have stopped the shipment of the items you selected. We're sorry for any inconvenience you've experienced due to these circumstances. If you need further assistance, please call 1-800-232-6459.

Michele Novak
Constituent Response Representative
Focus on the Family"

Should be r^2 (sup tag didn't work).

And blueindependent. I would think a meditating pirate would chant:

Ruuuuuuuum

Hey Karley, where and when did you recieve that notice? And on what date did you place the order?

courtesy St. Roy Underhill (The Woodwright's Shop on PBS):
Why do pirates insulate their ships?

For the Arrrrgh! value, of course.

fusilier
James 2:24

plunge- I had to ask them where my stuff was. And I placed it the day after it was posted here, IIRC.

Darn- we broke FotF!

Darn. It was too good to be true: free copies of books I want to read but would never pay money for.

Are any of these pirates married to a woman named Peggy?

William Penn had a hard time finding a way to market his aunt's pies because they cost so much to make, the prices had to be outrageous in order to turn a profit. In fact, it got so bad that the big scandal of the day was the Pie Rates of Penn's Aunts.

BAH-DUM CHEESH!

....[crickets]

How much did the pirate pay for corn?

A Buck An Ear!

What modern science actually tells us is that we live in a remarkable and dynamic universe, in which the genuine miracle is its remarkable embrace of life and change. -- Kenneth Miller

How a pirate would say it:

Lookie thar at that rock. That`s th' real miracle a pile o' dirt an' a rock. Wow, miracles be really nifty accordin' t' th' Holy Father ya scallywag who ortin' t' be keel hauled!

Um...I liked the idea of the joke, but Ï â  r2

Not to mention the fact that Bluebeard wasn't a pirate.

By truth machine (not verified) on 05 Sep 2006 #permalink

"Let me also assure you that we have stopped the shipment of the items you selected. "
As always, too god to be true.

I have never understood how the fashionable pirate should accessorize.
A pARRRot or a pARRRakeet?

By Torbjörn Larsson (not verified) on 05 Sep 2006 #permalink