I've known this site for a long time, but a reader just sent me a link to it, so maybe I shouldn't take for granted that you all know about it, too…it's Fundies Say The Darndest Things, a collection of ripe and juicy quotes culled from Christian discussion boards. Some of them I suspect to be the product of godless trolls, but others, including some of the most outrageously ridiculous statements, are definitely from steadfast fundamentalists.
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Salon has a peculiarly defensive article by a Christian confessing to being embarrassed about her beliefs, which seems like a good start to me. She should be embarrassed. As a fun exercise, though, try reading her article while categorizing its statements in the Kübler-Ross stages — there's a bit…
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I have to confess to being amused to no end by the reaction to my tsunami post on ARN's message boards. They've all got their panties in a bunch because of how horribly insensitive I am, though I frankly think this outrage is entirely fake. It's just easier to focus on that rather than on the…
I prefer "Overheard in New York"
http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/
Typical sample:
"Stuffy white lady pushing stroller, to friend: I can't believe people are actually taking Justin Timberlake seriously these days.
Hipster crossing East: He brought sexy back, b***h! What the hell did you do?"
Link isn't working for me...and my car won't start this morning. Maybe it's just me.
The original site doesn't seem to load so well, but here's the mirror site.
Thanks Dan, that one works fine for me.
- DaveX, I have known that "overheard in NY site" for a while and it is always great for a laff.
- Dahan, your mistake is that you didn't say "C'mon Spaghetti Monster" before trying again. That goes for both links and car-starting.
PZ, it does seem a little weird that you've got banners for FUSE on this sight. Bringing all different faiths together?
OK, that's it, I'll quit spamming.
PZ, the Pharyngula effect has apparently killed the site.
I'm sorry.
I clicked on the mirror site (#3 Comment) looking for some humour. However the second quote about the gay teen who killed himself stopped me chuckling.
Stupid? Obscene? Apparently Atheists are the evil ones. Ha.
I feel appalled to be still alive when such ignorant, self-consuming malevolent love is still praised by my fellow humans.
Aagh. I'm upset now.
Oli.
I clicked on the mirror site (#3 Comment) looking for some humour. However the second quote about the gay teen who killed himself stopped me chuckling.
Once you realize that we homos aren't really people, you'll start to feel better.
Oh my God!!
I read stuff at that cite for 60 seconds, and my IQ per sent went down by thousands in less than a minute.
Sorry it was the third quote on the page.
Awful.
Oli
It's not necessarily that - unless the effect is supposed to stretch backwards in time too! The site already wasn't working for me when I tried a day or so ago. It's also been dodgy on previous occasions.
Wow, what a site. I don't think they were saying the darndest things, they were vomiting hatred. So sad.
I used to check that site regularly until it stopped becoming fun and started becoming depressing seeing such a combination of ignorance and arrogance.
But every once in a while I just HAVE to submit a quote I've heard almost that's too good to be true (And sometimes they are. Everyone gets smacked by Poe's Law at least once).
There's also an Overheard in Minneapolis.
SEF @ 12:
Time? What means time for such as Pharyngula? PZ is all-powerful and has little regard for chronological order.
I wonder how long it will be until the first half of this comment is mined to show that PZ is the god of atheists? ;)
Just to remember, Allan Glenn (WinAce, the boy behind FSTDT) died in late 2005. He left quite the legacy despite being only 20 years old.
@ #8:
I read that one, too, and then I read a bit further, including on the forum where she's being consoled after her son committed suicide. I don't buy it; I think she's trolling. She says things like "But isn't it my fault for not accepting him for being gay? :("
And the comments continue. Of course, the fundies believe her, and say some truly awful things, which is bad enough. But I don't think anyone died here.
That's not to say that this sort of thing doesn't happen, though.
This has been mentioned elsewhere before, but there's a certain irony that the FSTDT is now hosted by a PETA supporter...
Re #18
I hope you are right there.
My all time favorite from FStDT (which is MIA, but here's the original source):
It really is about having God take care of those you hate so you don't have to, isn't it.
Same with the folks who supported the murderous mother's hatred.
#19:
That's why I stopped reading it. That and the wave of depression it induces in me. I wonder what Allan would think of it now.
Under-hole? That's a new one.
Pop in and out of FSTDT, but it does consume minutes of my life I will never get back.
Followed the link to Overheard in New York. And to use horrible msn slang, ROFLMAO. Luckily I am the only one in my office today, so the chuckles didn't need to be so concealed. Classic!
Oh, I must see that! Final fatal freaky flaming fluid feathers!
If the site weren't down, I would contribute this gem from a personal conversation I had:
"I didn't like the way [the Catholics] changed the Bible."
-- A fundamentalist, on why he converted from Catholicism to fundagelical Protestantism.
FSTDT main site has been unreachable for the last day or so - but I dip in there regularly just for the incredulity factor ... just when you think things could go no lower (and that is sans the poe's).
To my mind the saddest entries are those culled from Rapture Ready. Specifically those who claim there is nothing worth starting in life as the current troubles in the world are a sure sign of the end times, and that life is so, so depressing that they are begging and pleading to be raptured away from it all.
I cannot even imagine what it must be like living your life like that ... assuming that the whole site is not just one big "i'm more ready to be raptured than the next guy" bragging circle.
So, should I get porn magazines, rub myself in holy ways, pick whores in expensive bars and shove only short objects up my under-hole?
"I can sum it all up in three words: Evolution is a lie "
I got a chuckle from that one.
OT, but what the hey, it's sort of all the same thing. Here's the site promoting Expelled to Xian schools. The FAQ is interesting, I think. Here's some of it:
[Repeating the last line of my previous post, "Here's some of it:]
See all of the concern about science in the quotes?
Anyway, I didn't intend to break up the post (clicked wrong), but it should work out anyhow.
Glen D
http://tinyurl.com/2kxyc7
I don't know if I formatted incorretly so that the link to "GetExpelled" doesn't work, or if it's just being clicked on by too many people. In case it's the former, here's the link again:
http://www.getexpelled.com/
Glen D
I've now got a mental picture of people 'orbiting' mountains which I can't get out of my head!
'... objects in space have yet to receive mans touch, and thus have no sin to weigh them down.'
Erm... so how come the Moon hasn't come crashing down to Earth yet, since those 'evil' astronauts have stomped their sinful space boots all over it?
The stupid... it burns...
Sorry, no, that last link has some interesting stuff, too, like the tour being made. But it was this one, with its marketing to Xian schools that I thought was the most fascinating.
Glen D
From the link in my last post:
One should note that they're really spending a lot of money to pack the theaters. The last one amounts to $10/ticket, close to a full refund of the ticket price. They're obviously concerned about filling theater seats with that dog of a "movie."
Glen D
http://tinyurl.com/2kxyc7
PS One reason I've brought this up here is that I haven't yet been able to get through on PZ's link to "Fundies say the darndest things".
I can't load the page, but I wonder how long before quotes from Ben Stein end up there if they're not already.
Just for fun I went to Ben-boy's whinesite and under a new moniker left a real creationist turd (something about how nobody can explain how the pre-Cambrian explosion "created all those galaxies"). Being that the site is "moderated," I thought it would get wiped for sure.
It's still there!
Well, it's good to know that Expelled will be playing with Religulous. Actually, since Easter is really early this year (for sound theological reasons, I'm sure), then Religulous will be out first if they still do the Easter date. I hope that the local arthouse, at least, will have it.
Just wait until "javascript" comes at with quote-mining and a bunch of dishonesty. That's when they censored my rebuttal of his lies. I rather suspect that he's part of Expelled, perhaps Ruloff or Ken Miller (Miller responded to me using his name on the first blog, and did nothing but accuse and fail to back up anything he'd written or said, so he's a very good guess for who "javascript" is).
They really do seem to allow a lot there, but their tolerance ends when certain people wish for their lies to stick.
Glen D
http://tinyurl.com/2kxyc7
My favourite FSTDT quote ever is from "Marie O" on Christian Forums:
I vouch for it's existence - I remember the original thread, which is sadly now gone from Christian Forums and from FSTDT. Good to see that Christian teens are exploring sado-masochism as an alternative to the nasty-nasty that God forbids.
Lessee... a woman living with her fiance... abstaining from sex... so he gets metal prongs in his prong whenever he thinks of sticking his prong into her socket.
So now the guy is learning to associate sexual arousal with excruciating genital pain. (Anthony Burgess didn't even go that far.) Yep. That bodes well for the future of their sex life as a married couple.
Too late.
*smirk*
Oh, I forgot to add:
IDIOTS! FUCKING IDIOTS!
[Insert/remove punctuation at your discretion]
They do say the darndest things though don't they? It wouldn't be as scary if they weren't the front runners in the campaign to select your presidential candidate though. Here's a doozy from the huckster himself..revise the constitution to bring it in line with sharia biblical law. Do something about this would you. Khomeini was bad enough. Your lot has nukes.
Re: IDIOTS! I remember seeing an ad for a similar device in one of the early 1900s editions of The Onion in Our Dumb Century (along with the chicken raper, an implement that no animal husbandrist should be without). Satire is dead.
This site has been BLOCKED in accordance with the Acceptable Use Policy
Site:www.fstdt.com
Category:Tasteless & Offensive
He should have tried a pair of locking nuts.
FSTDT has been hit by both Digg and Reddit in the past few days, so at best it is slow and at worse unavailable.
I generally have a browse every few days. I don't know why I do this as I end up feeling both sad and infuriated.
I love FSTDT, but I can only handle it in limited doses. It's like stumbling across an abandoned goldmine, but once you step inside and take a whiff, you realize that it has been abandoned because all the shiny gold nuggets are actually dog turds. The stinkier ones used to get nominated for facetious awards such as the "Highly Polished Mirror Award," or the "Best Liar for Jesus Award."
The first page I read contained a howler that is still my absolute favorite over two years later:
"One of the most basic laws in the universe is the Second Law of Thermodynamics. This states that as time goes by, entropy in an environment will increase. Evolution argues differently against a law that is accepted EVERYWHERE BY EVERYONE. Evolution says that we started out simple, and over time became more complex. That just isn't possible: UNLESS there is a giant outside source of energy supplying the Earth with huge amounts of energy. If there were such a source, scientists would certainly know about it."
This quote was so good they made a new category of "award" to honor it: The "Fundamentalist Almost Discovers the Sun Award."
I'm gonna guess that quote about thermodynamics is fake, but a lot of the others on evolution definitely aren't.
I read about 20 of them and had to stop and put an icepack over my eyes. There's a whole lot of ignorance out there.
"Fundamentalist Almost Discovers the Sun Award."
That has got to be satire. Surely. Please let it be satire.
I fail at posting. Sorry, trying again:
When the quote was first posted here (last year, IIRC), I wondered the same thing, and followed the citation to the original forum that it was posted to. The original forum was for video games, I think, and all of the posters sounded very young.
As best I could tell, the original poster of that particular post was in earnest.
As I recall, either that poster, or someone else who was trying to provide support, copied-and-pasted an ancient creationist canard about the rate of dust falling from space onto the moon as a "disproof" of the ancient age of the earth (since the lunar astronauts would have sunk into the dust, allegedly).
One of those rebutting that claim was a moon landing denialist.
Argh.
FSTDT It's like a car crash, you know you shouldn't look, but you just have to.
I sent an E-mail to the guy who runs FSTDT and suggested that he could perhaps find a better use for his talents. All right, a few of the Top 100 were written by genuine AHs, but most of them strike me as ravings of people who are just hopelessly unable to deal with reality. When I first looked at it, I felt as though I had stumbled into a circus freak show. I am a lifelong atheist and have no more use for fundies than the rest of us who read Pharyngula, but really, can't we do something more productive?
Damn, now I've got heartburn again. It draws you in like eating chips.
"One of the most basic laws in the universe is the Second Law of Thermodynamics. This states that as time goes by, entropy in an environment will increase. Evolution argues differently against a law that is accepted EVERYWHERE BY EVERYONE. Evolution says that we started out simple, and over time became more complex. That just isn't possible: UNLESS there is a giant outside source of energy supplying the Earth with huge amounts of energy. If there were such a source, scientists would certainly know about it."
This quote was so good they made a new category of "award" to honor it: The "Fundamentalist Almost Discovers the Sun Award."
I am going to be giggling about this at random moments for quite some time to come.
You say to yourself, "My G_d, it's like turning over a rock!" But then you say, "Wait, that's unfair -- unreasonable! The little crawlies under the rock are harmless, useful, even, like Darwin's earthworms. I take it back. It's like peering over the edge of hell."
Hmmm.... my browser tells me
Of course not, Bobby. She didn't pay the renewal fee on the site name because she was raptured. It's just that she was the only one, so we didn't notice.
Kseniya: Worse than that - REM sleep often involves erections, so if he wears this torture device to bed ...
So, should I get porn magazines, rub myself in holy ways, pick whores in expensive bars and shove only short objects up my under-hole?