What are you doing here?

Do I know what rhetorical means?

All answers to this question will be woo filled and subject to a future Richard Dawkins' book: "The Purpose Filled Life Delusion". The truth is that no matter what narrative arc we use to frame our dreary lives it matters not.

What am I doing here? Creating happiness wherever I go, of course. Isn't that what we were put on earth for? ;)

Watching Doctor Who!

Well, I'm buying into gold ETFs! What are YOU doing here.

Having one hell of a good time! Woof, woof.

I'm not here at all.
I'm elsewhere.
Why do you ask?

Spreading the word of god.. why? You know we're trying to do that all the time..

Nuffink, guv. Honest.

Looking for squirrels.

Well according to my job, I live to serve, but if I had my way, I'd live to live. ;)

Well, at the moment I'm muttering under my breath about people who post links to videos that are "no longer available". Grumble, grumble. ;^)

Disproving religion.

Lurking?

Today, helping the Redhead give a special dinner to a few of her friends. Tomorrow, who knows?

Eating chocolate.

I'm just waiting around long enough to be there when they cut off your head and stick it on a pike, as a warning to the next ten generations that some favors come with too high a price. I want to look up into your lifeless eyes and wave... like this. Can you and your associates arrange that for me, Mr. Morden?

Oh shit, wrong question.

Crawlin'
Walkin'
Runnin'
Jumpin'
Eatin'
Drinkin'
Pissin'
Dumpin'
Rubin'
Kissin'
Strokin'
Missin'
Workin'
Earnin'
Payin'
Learnin'
Smokin'
Sleepin'
Laughin'
Weepin'
Watchin'
Waitin'
Grinin'
Statein'
Screamin'
Cryin'
Dreamin'
Lyin'
Scrapin'
Slapin'
Livin'
Dyin'
Nutin' Why do you ask?

Writing a reply to a blog post that has a video of Dr. Who Clips.

Looking at about 7:27 in this long video of Whoodom, and deciphering what the new doctor is really saying...

Aah, I see what you did there !

Making and consuming beer. What else would I be doing?

not being there...

That's what I was asking.

Palin' around with terrorists.

Slackin'

I'm not really here. I'm over there. ---->

Burning FSM's into students with a Tesla coil.

I'm just here for the hors d'oeuvres.

Cheeze-whiz?
Ham? (That ain't kosher!)
Crackers anyone? (That ain't funny!)

Define "you", "doing" and "here".

As little as possible.

Now try the same thing with the phrase "The question is..." in Star Trek DS9!

I am certain it's said somewhere in every single episode.

I'm trying to find myself. If anybody sees me, kindly let me know.

Writing a reply to a blog post that has a video of Dr. Who Clips.

Completely OT (well, as far off as it can be in a thread with no topic), but that reminds me of a good joke:

A contractor is lost in a hot-air balloon. He descends and comes across someone on the ground. "Excuse me. Can you tell me where I am?" he asks.

The man on the ground replies, "You are in a hot-air balloon several feet above the ground."

The contractor smiles and says, "You must be an engineer."

"Yes I am, how did you know?"

"Because your answer was completely correct but useless."

The engineer says, "you must be a contractor."

"I am. How did you know?"

The engineer answers, "because you are in the same situation you were in before you met me, but now it's my fault."

Playing Rocket Slime, fishing through old threads for amusing comments.

Ah, more evidence in my, "Good British TV is a Myth!" argument.

bunnycatch3r: The truth is that no matter what narrative arc we use to frame our dreary lives it matters not.

Wow, you must be fun at parties!

Why do people insist on pretending there exists a "God's eye-view" of our lives? Lives can only be seen from the inside --- there is no life independent of the narrative arcs we create. It's only subjective -- the objective view is a religious Delusion.

Could you rephrase the question? I don't quite undergetit.

Pondering the underlying motives for such a question...
Really, what are "here" or "there" but subjective observations relative to one's own frame of reference which may or may not represent the views of the target of said question. For example: "What are you doing here?"
"But I'm not there, I'm here"
"well, you certainly seem to be here to me"
"But 'here,' for you, would imply my being in your specific location, which I am not, I am in my own location, thus, to you, I would be 'there.'"

I came here for an argument...

The real question is how can you be in two places at once when you're not anywhere at all.

Taking in chemicals, using the differential energy within those bonds, and excreting a set of chemicals with a lowered energy level. At the moment, thin-crust pizza is undergoing this process. You're welcome ecosystem.

Posting.

Why am I not 'throwing' a poll?

Preaching to the choir of my fellow angry militant fundamentalist extreme atheists, of course.

At the moment trying to rehabilitate a stroke victim and give her her extra years.

...while harrassing sycophants on the side...

I'm here for the misleading headlines... like: http://nbcsports.msnbc.com/id/27043577/

And there I sat, thinking, if only for a moment, that we had some sort of scientific evidence that angels exist and that they are actually malevolent.

"working" aka wasting the day waiting for something to cross my desk

Andy Jones: Taking in chemicals, using the differential energy within those bonds, and excreting a set of chemicals with a lowered energy level.

Don't forget the entropy -- you're a non-equilibrium system!

Well, to answer with a question out of an entirely different show, Mr. Morden and his associates would like to know:

"What do want?"

Gathering evidence for anticipatory finals insanity in biology professors in Minnesota. In your post I have found a gold mine.

Oh shut up maditude! You have no right to just burst in here and demand anything. ;o)

I like Spike Milligan's answer to that particular question:

"Everybody's got to be somewhere!"

As much as I can.

Trying to design better products that use less energy and cost less to make.

And in my spare time design transportation systems that use less energy.

More fun than going to church and watching mindless TV

I came here for an argument...

No, you didn't.

I am not here.

Rev, of course you're not here, you're there.

Rev, of course you're not here, you're there.

No, he's not. I'm there, and if he were here, I'd see him.

Off monkeying around huh?

that would be none of your damned business.

Damned well is too!

Well, no matter where you go, there you are.

Avoiding real work, mostly.

We're on a road to nowhere.

You don't know shit from Shinola, bub.

42

Not much. You?

Having just finished viewing the video, and then read comment #12, I'd say I'm ...

Proposing a new (AFAIK) Internet law:

No comment thread on a blog entry containing an embedded video is complete until someone incorrectly complains that the video is no longer available.

Ha! It's 23.

You don't know shit from Shinola, bub.

I always thought that said more about Shinola than it did about me.

Procrastinating reading World English lit (before 1650). Current time in literature - Christian Europe, New Testament. Ugh.

Looking for work, since my office closed last Tuesday.

You're wrong.

Looking for a screw driver, I have a bunch of cupboards to build in a hurry.

I'm nowhere near there. I say the fuck away from there.

Today I'm not sure. Some days when I wake up, a reason pops into my head and makes life worth living. For the other days, I've learned to endure, maybe help others with their quest or just wait for tomorrow.

Is that line in every episode of Doctor Who past and present??

I'm a Doctor Who fan but that is taking it to absurd lengths.

Breathing, digesting the cookie I just ate, and typing a response to your demanding question. Then, clicking post.

I'm putting off writing an essay on pagan customs in Europe, and rehearsing what I'm going to tell my whippersnapper, know it all teacher when I don't hand it in on time.

You don't get off that easy buster. You just say the fuck here.

Currently, perusing through the U.S. budget documentation...

I came here for an argument...

No, you didn't.

Yes, he did.

I came here for an argument...

No, you didn't.

Yes, he did.

Good point.

I'll say where I damn please.

Whatever it is, it ain't what you're doing.

procrasturbating

You sit down and say where you're told to.

I don't recollect.

What I'm doing here:

-Not working
-Loving science
-Building a career
-Wondering how Dr. Who writers keep getting paid

procrasturbating

"I know I should, but I really don't feel like masturbating right now."

If I may?

pleading,
needing,
bleeding,
breeding,
feeding,
exceeding,

where is everybody?

trying,
lying,
defying,
denying,
crying,
dying,

where is everybody?

'Ello-'ello, what's all this then?

The pooh flingers are here. Don't blat, throw some!

Laughing at the comments!

Why, I am posting a comment, of course.

"What are you doing here?" Now, that's a question I'd like to ask Congress. Especially after their last giveaway!

Oh, hell, let's just ask anybody: What are you doing here?

Eccles: Everyone's gotta be somewhere.

Er.....trying to work out which one is Richard Dawkins' wife.

Existing
and self medicating back spasms, getting old sucks
/ that's not an argument, that's just contradiction

I must say that even though I consider myself a hard-core Dr. Who fan, I never noticed how much that line is repeated.

The phrase that I look for in every episode is "Of course!". That is pretty much in every episode.

Thanks for the walk down Dr. Who memory lane!!

Taking a break from writing. On to the next chapter.

Ummmmm,what was the question?

Picking at scabs and flakes and other things.

To grossly oversimplify the last 13.7 Billion years of cosmology and evolution, humans are simply sentience born out of energy. As far as we know, we are the only entities capable of understanding the universe. Because of this, we as a species have a (rather self-defined) purpose to do just that.

Me, specifically? I'm just one guy with strange ideas.

Here, specifically? I'm bored and my next class starts an hour from now.

Looking forward to Atheist Alliance International's 2009 Conference, which will be here in Colorado in September. Bill Maher and Richard Dawkins are supposed to be here. Will you be here with us again, PZ? I owe you drinks, you know.

Damn! I hope maditudes troll shows up pretty soon, I'm almost out of pooh.

procrasturbating= putting off getting off?

I'm just here for the food.

Waiting for Digital Cuttlefish's next poem.

Wishing I could step into a police box and take a trip to anywhere in the universe.

There once was a man named P-Zed.
His ilk and his minions he led.
Thought none bought creation,
This Pharyngulanation,
And this is what all of them said:

What are you doing here?

(With apologies to Cuttlefish.)

Waiting for the next Dr. Who disc to arrive via Netflix.

Like so many of my peers in this thread I am fooling around at work rather than shove paper around. Specifically I am smoking tobacco, drinking coffee and listening to Jerry Lee Lewis sing "High School Hop". I skipped watching the video clip because I was too lazy to allow NoScript to let it run.

Patricia,

Given that you eat any trolls that show up here, the poo you find to fling at trolls must logically be...

Eating some teriyaki chicken and rice. Mmmm teriyaki

/ that's not an argument, that's just contradiction

No it isn't.

JohnnieCanuck, Only partially, I have thirteen pullets out back. I need all the help I can get when it comes to flinging it with the trebuchet.

You say out of it.

It's similar to Eastenders (BBC) where in practically every episode someone bursts into a room and demands "What's goin' on 'ere then?" to which the answer is inevitably: "Naffin'!" ("Nothing" for U.S. readers).

btw I don't watch Eastenders but my mum does, and I get subjected to it whenever I visit her. That's my excuse anyway.

Nothing. Who said I was doing anything? Who's asking anyway? I didn't do it! I deny everything!! This is persecution!!!!

Saying "Stm Dm Ftmsh".

I don't get it. What are you doing here?????

Getting older, all the time.
Trying to avoid dying, mainly.
So far, so goo

You say out of it too, bub.

Proving to the outside world that we are monkeys. Flinging feces at one another.

Prosletyzing for the Flying Spaghetti Monster, of course. Duh!

NmcC@97: I think that's her asking the eternal question at 5.22

El Herring: Leave it aat, you're doin' my 'ead in.

If, in fact, I know that I am here, I cannot precisely define what I am doing. And, of course, if I know what I am doing, I cannot precisely state that I am in fact, here.

The case above would be a best case scenario. In all likelihood, I have no idea where I am or what I'm doing.

Wondering if the frequency with which the question is asked is enough to make that a very, very dangerous drnking game, or whether there are so many episodes of Dr who you would need a drink between drinks...

Waiting for either

1. another dumb poll to crash or
2. pictures of cephalapods getting it on.

Oh and avoiding getting anything productive done.
What are YOU doing here?

In all likelihood, I have no idea where I am or what I'm doing.

I usually feel that way after leaving the pub.

Hunting for snark.

No you're not.

here for the laughs, and the chortling, definitely for the chortling.

by the way, what does chortling mean?

Christopher: that's what's "doin' my 'ed in" at the moment. It rings a bell but I can't place it.

Okay, I'll just have to ask (I think this is the correct response anyway): what's a ftmsh?

Chortling - that's one I do know (being a bit of a Lewis Carroll fan). It's one of what he called his "portmanteau" words, made from combining "chuckle" and "snort". It was of course used in the Jabberwocky poem.

And on that subject, allow me to use that as an excuse to provide a link to said poem with my own original "sequel" written eight years ago. Enjoy.

Refereeing fights between the kids, the cat and the dog, the husband and the kids, the husband and the cat (the cat is winning btw) ect....

Taking comfort in evidence for the existence of rational life forms on this little rock I'm sitting on.

I care about a story no one will hear.

I'm trying to learn for free...

Making my brain itch.

being the best mother-fuckin' Petey I can be

well, aside from being lazy

Sent here by Rebbecca Watson on the Skeptic's Guide podcast. Now you're in my RSS feed reader, and you'll have to be really boring or obnoxious to escape!

So far, it's too interesting to ignore ;)

I won!

What did you win?

I have come here to chew bubble gum and kick ass. And I'm all out of bubble gum.

What!? Why would you want to know!? Should I give you a copy of my passport while we're at it?!

Nosy bloggers, can't trust 'm.

So you hadn't heard that SciBlogs now has its own Patriot Act? PZ has been appointed Head of Blogland Security. Now hand over your papers!

what's a ftmsh?

Ftmsh was a head-skewering demon, accidentally summoned as a result of a Grauniad misprint in a boring(?) episode of "The Young Ones" (BBC, the eighties)

Taking a nice long stroll down Memory Lane :)

The real question is how can you be in two places at once when you're not anywhere at all.

Where do you go when you're toad away?

Drinking my 3rd Mountain Dew for the day and waiting for another 25 minutes to tick off the clock so I can go home.

The real question is how can you be in two places at once when you're not anywhere at all.

Where do you go when you're toad away?

There isn't a day goes by I don't ask myself that very question as I struggle to teach English in Korea....

What do you mean by "here"?

What do you mean by "here"? #145...OMG, They Live!

Trying to decide where I really am. . .

Trying to decide where I really am. . .

Not that I admit that I am, in fact, here, but if I were, I'd be getting along best I could. I think.

JBS

Trying to decide where I really am. . .

Waiting for the Godotess, as usual.

Ftmsh was a head-skewering demon, accidentally summoned as a result of a Grauniad misprint in a boring(?) episode of "The Young Ones" (BBC, the eighties)

Boring episode of the Young ones?!?!?!?

I'll tell you...but first, who wants to know?

And, why pray tell do they want to know it?

Why do you stay that?

"What are you doing here?"
"What are you doing there?"

That's my business, not yours.

If you try to figure out what you're doing here based on what the answer is that a majority of other people infer that they are doing here, that's pathetic.

Sheep-ers, creepers!

Or, less vituperatively & more to the source: WHO ... are you? (buh-buh, .... buh-buh!)

ZOMG how freaking long did it take to make that video? That was crazy.

...and more directly, catching up on PZs awesomeness.

What are you doing here ?

Stealing Jokes.

Fr'instance, I've got half the freaks in Houston saying Malibu Barbie and Bible Spice.

http://acksisofevil.org/audio/inner195.mp3

scooter,

thanks for your rational & humorous link!
wish all 'mericuns would appreciate its pinpointing of Palin's thinkin'

Terry @ 133: by the way, what does chortling mean?

It's actually a sex thing. Perhaps you have heard of a humm job. Chortling is a laugh job. You simply get your partner going on you, then begin telling really funny jokes.

It's awesome.

Actually it works for vaginal sex as well, come to think of it (no pun)

Since you ask... I'm trying to learn!

Backstroke

Refusing to answer questions.

Specifically? Right now? Looking for educational ways to avoid my homework.

In a more general sense? Saving the world.

Posting Dr. Who clips so Phil Plait will read PZ's blog.

See - I told ya, you haven't seen nothin' till Scooter and Quiet Desperation show up.

Next thang ya know, the strumpets and sluts will sa-shay in.

Are w00+ and Cuttlefish gonna dodge this one? Oh, say it isn't so! They are - the boys in the back room.

Im in ur blogz, kommentn on ur entrys

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OBOVDv-NSMM

You sluts!

Expecting the Spanish Inquisition.

Shortening my handle. I'm tired of writing Arbutus Grove all the time.

Come to think of it that's a dumb handle. Any ideas for a different one?

I honestly don't know. Killing time? Trying to get exposure for my blog? Probably because it's a place where I can interact with many of high intellect on topics of interest. If this were a pub, I'd never leave.

Avoiding reviewing eukaryotic chromosome mapping techniques and being impressed that P.Z. posts some Who!

Now back to the tetratypes...

Any study tips out there? (Aside from the obvious...)

Posted by: Lago @ 35
"Ah, more evidence in my, "Good British TV is a Myth!" argument."

HEY! Don't diss the Doctor!

"...destroying the status quo, because the status is not quo!"

-Dr. Horrible

I don't know.

Nothing.

Wasn't me.

The big boys made me do it.

For more Doctor Who mash-up excellence:

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=Lmh8xeX6SG0

Loo: And who are they?
Dr. Klahn: Just lost drunken men who don't know where they are and no longer care.
Prisoner #1: Where are we?
Prisoner #2: I don't care!
Loo: And these?
Dr. Klahn: These are lost drunken men who don't know where they are, but do care! And these are men who know where they are and care, but don't drink.

Kentucky Fried Movie

'All answers to this question will be woo filled and subject to a future Richard Dawkins' book: "The Purpose Filled Life Delusion". The truth is that no matter what narrative arc we use to frame our dreary lives it matters not.'

Does that explain the brief appearance of Mrs. Dawkins in this clip :-) ?

Reminding myself that I'm going to bed in another fifteen minutes ... every hour or so.

Actually, I don't think she took his name.

Anyway, I'm watching David Attenborough.

steve_h: thanks. I had a vision in my mind of David Rappaport saying "What's a ftmsh?" but that only made me think of Time Bandits. I was right about Rappaport then (he played the demon in "Young Ones".)

Nice obscure quote from Christopher! That really got me thinking.

Asking people what they are doing here.

Crushing hardcore on David Tennant!

"Wondering how Dr. Who writers keep getting paid"

Thou shalt not mock or insult The Doctor!

Reversing entropy locally.
and reading too many comments...

Yes you do.

What.... why I come to this little part of the infinite web to keep sane. Good Job PZ....

Trying to figure out what I'm doing here...

Yah.

Doesn't answer the question?

Well, excuuuuuuse me, PeeZed!

Looking for a Paul McGann "What are you doing here" and found it in audio, along with thwarting the great Dalek Masterplan.

Looking for a Paul McGann "What are you doing here" and found it in audio, along with thwarting the great Dalek Masterplan.

What am I doing here?

Thinking. Precious few places to do that.

What am I doing here?

The same thing most of us are doing here.

I'm trying either to answer the question, "What am I doing here?" or to figure out if it's a meaningful question in the first place.

"watching the wheels"

Just drinkin' and a-drivin',
Makin' sure my dues get paid.

Waiting for the new season of Dr. Who with David Tennant; he rocks.
Friday on SciFi ch. and Saturday on BBC; various times - check your local listings.

What am I doing here?

hmmm.

I don't even know what the fuck "I" is.

Hiding behind the sofa, of course!

Just sitting around, trying to figure it all out, and enjoying the process!