…and suddenly people everywhere are sending you images from their snail and slug porn collections. You are all just plain weird.
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This morning's garden foray was weird.
Where were all the gastropods?
In 30 minutes of serious hunting, in past hiding places and what looked like reasonable candidates as auxiliary hiding places, I mostly came up empty. Some possible explanations for this:
I've put a serious dent in the snail…
This spam mail came into my mailbox, and I made the mistake of opening it. I know the spammers throw in random blocks of text and mangle the porn keywords to throw off our filters, but this juxtaposition was just plain weird.
Fundamentalists believe Jesus was God becoming man. I believe that Jesus…
All multicellular land species of life in Scandinavia are invasive: the area was covered by kilometres of ice until yesterday, geologically speaking. But some species are more recent invaders than others. Where I live, we currently have three species of large-bodied snail or slug: the Black slug (…
Yet another dry, overcast morning. Not the kind of weather when one feels like sliding on one's foot across scratchy leaves or stems.
At least if one is a snail or slug.
I went right to the instant-gratification spots for slug capture. Only two out of the six locations yielded slugs today. One…
damn exhibitionists, doing it on the front lawn instead of inside their homes...
Love: explain that evolution!!
Also how could male and female evolve simultaneously? Many generations of males would have died love-lorn waiting for the female to evolve so he could have sex. Think of it if eviloution is true generations suffered from COSMIC blue-balls.
I hope they're married.
generations suffered from COSMIC blue-balls.
generations, you say?
RAY COMFORT LIVES!!!!
:P
" Jadehawk Author Profile Page | March 23, 2009 8:48 PM
damn exhibitionists, doing it on the front lawn instead of inside their homes..."
And without benifit of clergy. Before the fall all animals were sanctified now they slake their unholy lust in so many preverted ways I just get rigid with anger thenking about them and thinking and thinking...
tsig: LMAO, literally. In class. That was beautiful.
@tsig #2
these definitely evolved male and female simultaneously. Land snails are hermaphrodites.
@JD #3
I don't know if it's legal for hermaphrodites to get married.
blueelm
Thanks It's scary how easy it is when you throw facts to the wind and just allow phrases to feed out into your fingertips.
Seriously, if you're gonna post mollusk porn, make it cephalopods. They probably enjoy it more.
I guess this would be one of those rare situations where being told that you have a slimy penis is actually quite a compliment.
The people I work with think I am weird for having insect porn, can't wait to show them some of this!
Slimy, writhing, hermaphrodidic sex.
I fail to see the problem here.
You're welcome
The people I work with think I am weird for having insect porn
Ooooh, do share.
Entomophilia
yup, it's a real paraphilia alrighty.
Did anyone see the episode of Dirty Jobs about trawling the high seas off Maine's coast for slime eels?
Mike Rowe said he was swimming in eel snot.
That is soooooo hot. More please. Some erotic snail stories would be good too!
I will admit I missed the "i" in the tag the first time.
"Organism"-->"Organsm"
Now I need to find something to get the coffee out of my keyboard....
Snails doing naughty,dirty evil sex!
I bet it takes them all day.
Ichthyic #15
More information than I need. Or want.
In
Out
In
Out
In
Out
maybe its time to change the name of the blog to Phalluswrangler !!
"I grew up on a farm. I have seen animals having sex in every position imaginable. Goat on chicken. Chicken on goat. Couple of chickens doing a goat. Couple of pigs watching…"
--Dwight Schrute
NewEnglandBob @ 16
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19336602/
And wasn't there a post a while back about hagfish slime making for a good egg-substitute? Nham, snot omelet aphrodisiac?
Maybe someone should also test it as a lubricant
SLUG LOVE ! HTTP//:bio.research.ucsc.edu/grad/weaver/Pages/project.html Go UCSC!!
damn smart phone, not so smartt
http://bio.research.ucsc.edu/grad/weaver/Pages/project.html
The mucous trail that shows a snail
Has recently passed by
Will not grow stale before a male
Decides to go say hi.
At such a scale, the fine detail
The pheromones supply
Will never fail as they assail
The mollusk's roving eye
(to no avail, I'll moan and wail
I meant not to imply
The "eye" is hale--it may need braille,
It's metaphor, not lie!)
My verse is frail--let sense prevail;
Let no one here deny
A snail may nail a bit of tail,
And who'd complain? ... not I.
So the "M" in MILF stands for Mollusk?
You haven't seen hot invertebrate sex until you've seen Isabella Rossellini act out invertebrate sex. I am so not kidding.
She did a series of Sundance videos called "Green Porno" that interpret various insect mating rituals.
I posted a link to a few shots in comment #19 in the first slug sex post, but here's a direct link to the two best images from the set:
http://s313.photobucket.com/albums/ll394/darrengarrison/slugs/?action=v…
http://s313.photobucket.com/albums/ll394/darrengarrison/slugs/?action=v…
oh, man, carlie, that is SUCH a keeper! Isabella Rosellini ACTING out insect sex???
Now I think I've seen it all.
ok, that stuff rules supremely, hehe. definitely bookmarking it for "future reference"
I find insect sex unappealing, what with Aliens and that mantis head-chewing thing. And to the slug thing all I could think of is "no tongues".
Now whale porn. On Blue Planet they described a penis as 'twice as long as a man'.
Now whale porn
now THAT'S whale porn.
muhahahhaha
I insist you all suffer the mightiest of earworms!
I am reminded of the hideous consequences of Penguin Lust in Bloom County.
Bad science writing alert, new "anthropod" discovered.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20090319/sc_afp/scienceuscanadaswedenpaleon…
I clicked on that, Ichthyic you bastard! *runs to find ear-soap*
Did somebody say whale porn?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OIcrCZQkSlg
(The whale porn is in there.)
El Marko, if you had ever seen slugs mating, you would not doubt that they enjoy it immensely. It is gorgeous and elegant, and makes the way you do it look clumsy (unless I am mistaken as to your species).
This blog is taking a new bent on tentacle sex. :(
That's hot! Shake that thang!
SEX SEX SEX. That's all you sick preverted science types
can think of! There's more to life you know!
"God willing, we will prevail, in peace and freedom from fear, and in true health, through the purity and essence of our natural fluids. God bless you all."
Plain weird? No, no, no. Exotic forms of weird.
Cue rousing muppet number of "The Internet is for Porn"....
Two cracked walnuts topped with a bit of almond cream?
A snail may nail a bit of tail,
Oh my, Cuttlefish such delicious vowel alliteration!
On Blue Planet they described a penis as 'twice as long as a man'.
That one was also described as "highly mobile".
These are all great references for my evolution of sex course. I get to show invertebrate pr0n in class!
wow, they look exactly like my pets Hugo and Dagmar. I have seen them laying eggs, but not doing that.
I like the WoW version better...
NSFW! NSFW!
Man, PZ, what the hell are you playing at here? My boss nearly saw that!
(Luckily he'd have no idea what was going on! Silly mammals.)
Did anyone see that human female "whale" dancing in the YouTube vid on that linked site?? Wee bit gtoss.