Ninja Squirrel

"Fear! Fire! Foes! Awake! Fear! Fire! Foes! Awake!"

"Stop that! What in hell are you barking at?" I look out the window. "It's a squirrel. Why are you barking like that at a single squirrel on the tree outside?"

"It's an evil squirrel! A threat to the home!"

"No, it's not. It's little and furry and harmless."

"Dude, you're wrong. Squirrels are dangerous. They're like ninjas. Haven't you seen that video?"

"What video?"

"See! See!"

"OK, fine, there is at least one squirrel somewhere in the UK that has been trained to have ninja skills by somebody with way too much free time."

"I told you!"

"But the squirrel in the video is not the same squirrel that's in our back yard right now, so stop with the wild barking."

"How can you be sure? They all look alike."

I look out the window. I look at the video. I look out the window. "You have a point. Maybe you should go outside and chase it off, just to be safe."

"Ooooo!" She races for the back door, claws scrabbling on the linoleum in the kitchen.

She's a very silly dog, but it doesn't hurt to humor her.