Ahead by a toe

Shorter D'enyse D'ohLeary: Global warming transforms New York Times to toast:

My toes are smarter than I am.

No really! Actual D'ohLeary:

My toes think that the global warming people are wrong. Do I know? No.

Because she got frostbite. In Ottawa.

OMG! Global warming is a lie becauseâ¦Â Canada is cold!

Now to drink until visions of D'ohLeary's twisted toes are blotted from my memory.

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