Just when you thought the highly evolved hominids occupying this planet have reached the nadir of lunacy, often described as a point so low no living being could go any further without drawing comparisons to a Monty Python sketch, comes this report:
A Venezuelan man who had been declared dead woke up in the morgue in excruciating pain after medical examiners began their autopsy.
Those of you who watch the late, late show on television might recall that the beginning of an autopsy usually involves carving the front of the body from chin to groin like a jack-o-lantern, which makes the lead sentence in this story a good example of litotes. But wait - was the poor fellow actually bisected by the unsuspecting pathologists?
Carlos Camejo, 33, was declared dead after a highway accident and taken to the morgue, where examiners began an autopsy only to realize something was amiss when he started bleeding. They quickly sought to stitch up the incision on his face.
There's another fine example of understatement: "something was amiss," as in "When I went upstairs after the tornado I knew something was amiss when I saw my house lying on top of the barn."
Wait a sec - they started to stich up the incision on his face? After an automobile accident? That's amazing. Usually autopsists are more preoccupied with such tasks as shoveling the brains into a plastic bag or playing kick-the-can with the detached leg. Do you suppose the accuracy of this story has suffered in translation?
"I woke up because the pain was unbearable," Camejo said, according to a report on Friday in leading local newspaper El Universal. His grieving wife turned up at the morgue to identify her husband's body only to find him moved into a corridor -- and alive.
One can imagine what the great Alfred Hitchcock would do with this story. Oh, wait - he already has. On November 13, 1955 he presented the half-hour drama "Breakdown," starring Joseph Cotten, and directed by the master himself. The program is a classic, with a plot eerily similar to what happened in Venezuela.
Hey, maybe this incident is just another one of Hugo Chavez's ingenious ideas on how to reduce the suffering of his people. His track record thus far hasn't exactly led to calls for a nomination by the Nobel committee. Autopsies while you sleep...could be an efficient way of disposing of complainers...
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Years ago a "dead" woman was transported from our hospital to a local funeral home. The embalmer thought he was dealing with a corpse when the "corpse" started to sit up. The poor lady had been in a deep diabetic coma and pronounced dead before her time. The embalmer almost suffered a fatal heart attack. Our local newspaper went wild over the story and for days the local folks were doing their best to stay out of the community hospital.
The stuff nightmares are made of.
Hello Dr. Hildreth my name is Wes and I stumbled upon your website while searching for answers to what it's like to be an oncologist for I am trying to become a doctor myself and specialize in oncology. I also live in St Louis. Before I dedicate my life (which I am very much prepared to do) I had some questions that I wanted to see if you could answer.
What is it like to be an oncologist? How long does it usually take to get your specialization? Is there anything I should know from the start that I could learn from your education over the years in and out of school? Is it a realistic goal, i.e, do you have to have amazing grades and a great institutional education? How is it rewarding? How is it hard? How are the patients generally (do they what to hug you or take a swing at you)?
If you could be brutally honest I'd appreciate it. (I've already started the basics actually). I sincerely thank you for taking even the time to read this.
-Wes Mann
my email is le_revetir@sbcglobal.net, I thought it would show you, sorry.
If you could be brutally honest I'd appreciate it. (I've already started the basics actually). I sincerely thank you for taking even the time to read this.