HIV BEATS INVERTEBRATES - ADVANCES TO SEMI FINAL.

PRESS CENTER | PRINTABLE BRACKETS


What a game! What a game! Unbelievable from the start to the finish! I mean who could've imagined such drama in a match that pitted tentacles against viral particles. But this baby was action packed all the way. HIV was cocky from the get go...

"I am sooo gonna kick ass. I am unstoppable. Folks call me a travesty, folks call me a genocide, and there's nothing you can do about it. Even my merchandise is better than those pansy soft invertebrates. They got nothing on me. Nothing!"

i-e5cc59b660225acec6aa996cfb36edfd-HIVtshirt.jpg


And while the dig about the merchandise may have been true, it was hardly the walk over that HIV seemed to be foreseeing.

i-e10e5c74e676ecaad38ffec2e8b04bbc-inverttshirt.jpg

If anything, it was the invertebrates that started off strong. I mean it's not hard to imagine the prowess that those giant squid are capable of, and we've already seen in the past the damage those multiple limbs can do. Plus, this team has two of them, which in combination with the playmaking skills of those bees, propelled the team to a surprising lead after the first quarter.

In the second quarter, the lead even grew. Team HIV was stymied when they realized that invertebrates are not actually affected by its pathogenic awesomeness.

But then two things happened - first, HIV got a helping hand with the appearance of Colony Collapse Disorder in the stands. This seriously unsettled the bees and indeed the rest of the team. The playmakers were suddenly off the game, and HIV saw an opportunity.

And if we know one thing about HIV, we know that HIV thrives on opportunity:

Number of people living with HIV

According to estimates from the UNAIDS/WHO AIDS Epidemic Update (November 2007), around 30.8 million adults and 2.5 million children were living with HIV at the end of 2007.

Number of people infected during 2007, and the number of deaths

During 2007, some 2.5 million people became infected with the human immunodeficiency virus (HIV), which causes AIDS.

The year also saw 2.1 million deaths from AIDS - a high global total, despite antiretroviral (ARV) therapy, which reduced AIDS-related deaths among those who received it. The number of deaths probably peaked around 2005, and has since declined only slightly.

And so, for the remaining two quarters, HIV pretty much played its way to a victory, at times sneaky, at times with brute force. Even the squid were whimpering at one point - they had never faced an opponent capable of so much carnage.

"Listen here people, this is HIV speaking to you, so you better listen. I'm here to dominate. I'm going to win this thing. I always win. I always win..."

Final score: HIV 98, Invertebrates 89

More like this

"I am sooo gonna kick ass. I am unstoppable. Folks call me a travesty, folks call me a genocide, and there's nothing you can do about it

I never imagined laughing at the scourge of AIDS....until now.

I wonder what HIV would look like as a human incarnate, with a towel over its head as it weaves, bobs, and talks smack about invertebrates.