The Tabouli Craving

Amanda, who is pregnant, claims to have had no food aversions and she claims to have no food cravings. This makes me laugh.

One reason it makes me laugh is that Amanda is one of the most rational, straight thinking people I've ever known. She knows there is a reality, she faces it daily, and she even teaches about it in a high school. So when she claims to have had no aversions and no cravings, I can only assume that denial of such things is itself some sort of side effect off pregnancy.

To be fair, the preponderance of evidence has eventually convinced even her that she has had aversions and cravings. In fact, today she just came out and admitted what she did early today. Here, I will reconstruct the event, and it pertains to Tabouli, the Middle Eastern salad often served as a side dish.

The scene: The local place that sells Tabouli. A young girl with no authority is working the counter.

"Do you have Tabouli ..."

"... Yes, ma'am, right here. Like side orders of Tabouli."

"No, no ... do you have Tabouli in larger containers. Like, maybe a vat or something?"

"... Ah, no, like just these little side order things."

"Well, OK. You do catering, right? What if you were catering something and someone wanted Tabouli..."

Amanda applies one of her teacher looks. The young girl starts to squirm.

"... Like, let me get the manager, OK?"

.... waiting .... for the Tabouli ...

"Hello...." said George, according to his name tag. "What can I do for you ma'am?"

"Hello, George. I just want you to know that you're dealing with a Pregnant Woman with a Craving."

George, perhaps because of a cultural or gender related barrier, did not quite seem to understand.

"Anyway, I'd like a large amount of Tabouli."

"... Yes, we have these side orders of Tabouli."

"No, I'd like more. A larger amount..."

"... Ma'am, I'm sure we can fix you up with whatever amount you want," continued George, pulling three or four tiny side orders of Tabouli out of the refrigerator.

"More."

"Excuse me, ma'am?"

"Like if you were catering . If you were catering an event, and someone wanted Tabouli. You would supply a larger amount of Tabouli, correct?"

"Yes, yes, we can cater. For how many?"

"Ten."

Pulling out a small note pad and beginning to write, "For when would this ..."

"Now. Right now."

And so, when I came home from the coffee shop, there was Amanda and this vat ... like whopping big huge vat ... of Tabouli. And Amanda. And a spoon.

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