Alert: Bird Flu Strikes Florida Trailer Park!

Oh the humanity! What carnage! I wonder what the connection with Al Gebra is? Biological warfare?

The real question is what did this do to the lucrative Easter egg market. And let's all pray that this disease doesn't develop the ability to spread directly between lawn jockeys.

So would this strain be PA(H5N1)?

Obviously this calls for a cull of wild and domestic plastic flamingos and the development of a vaccine for lawn jockeys and garden gnomes.

Obviously this calls for a cull of wild and domestic plastic flamingos and the development of a vaccine for lawn jockeys and garden gnomes.

At last! An excuse to hunt down domestic plastic flamingos.

If this is in Florida, I am almost certain that the deaths were not the result of bird flu. It is far more likely that they were all run down by an 85-year-old Ohio man who returns yearly to Ohio to get his driver's license renewed because he can't possibly pass a vision exam to get a new license in Florida. You can probably find him at the nearest bar. His car is the one with pink plastic feathers on the bumper. You might also find a couple of mailboxes embedded in the grill.