The Brief Safe

I know that all my readers make frequent journeys to exotic places, so I thought I might suggest something that you can use to keep your cash and small valuables safe from theft -- in any country!

The "Brief Safe" is an innovative diversion safe that can secure your cash, documents, and other small valuables from inquisitive eyes and thieving hands, both at home and when you're traveling. Items can be hidden right under their noses with these specially-designed briefs which contain a fly-accessed 4" x 10" secret compartment with Velcro closure and "special markings" on the lower rear portion. Leave the "Brief Safe" in plain view in your laundry basket or washing machine at home, or in your suitcase in a hotel room - even the most hardened burgler or most curious snoop will "skid" to a screeching halt as soon as they see them. (Wouldn't you?) Made in USA. One size. Color: white (and brown).

To add realistic smell, check out "Doo Drops". Doo Drops look and smell just like real diarrhea. Many useful applications, all of which will be left to your imagination. It's just like a tube of explosive diarrhea, except silent for stealth deployments. It comes in a handy dropper-top squeeze dispenser for rapid, realistic applications. All-natural. SMELLS LIKE CRAP.

Note: I am not endorsing this product in any way, I don't receive any rewards for drawing your attention to it, nor does the purveyor of this crap even know I am posting about it.

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Dang! Now that someone done commercialized my idea, the thieves will know where to look and I'll have find somewhere else to hide my jewels.

Seriously: that's nasty. If you leave something like that around, it might end up incinerated or hanging on your tent.

Leave it lying around it the wrong hotel, and you might find it washed.

There's a money laundering joke in there, but I can't find it.

Bob

I know that all my readers make frequent journeys to exotic places

You must be talking about someone else. The refrigerator is not all that exotic.

By Mustafa Mond, FCD (not verified) on 09 Feb 2007 #permalink

That's what my unders would look like if I moonlighted in a male review strip club, (except nobody would be tucking Benjamins in my nether regions...)

By General Generalist (not verified) on 09 Feb 2007 #permalink