My brain would melt

I have a prior engagement so I'll be missing this one, fortunately: it's a rally in Minnesota on 7 April featuring Michele Bachman and Sarah Palin. In the same place and the same time. It will be like an intellectual black hole.

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Just thinking about it, nooooooooooooo

By Nerd of Redhead, OM (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

How many "reporters" will The Daily Show send to Minnesota? I smell comedy!

Is there a way to immunise the local populace against teh stupid? Even thinking about those two morons makes me nauseous.

By WowbaggerOM (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

Wouldn't an intellectual black hole contain a huge amount of intellect in a small space? This would be more like an intellectual leaf blower.

By theelkmechanic (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

Oh, the evil...*shudders*

By Caine, Fleur du mal (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

theelkmechanic,

Wouldn't an intellectual black hole contain a huge amount of intellect in a small space?

Nah, the intellectual black hole is an infinite density of stupid¹; the analogy is that no intellectual light escapes².

--

¹ Yes, a privative term, I know.

² Well, except via Hawking radiation.

By John Morales (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

OMG, the sucking will be long and loud in Minnesota that day, doncha know. A-yup.

By sizzzzlerz (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

The floor will melt. The city might collapse, the state might implode. The air will reek of sulfur.

By NewEnglandBob (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

Will you have a place to come home to PZ? I'd be afraid the mental vacuum created by those two would cause MN to implode!

By https://www.go… (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

Rev. BDC:

Oh that's bad but get this, Palin and Beck are going on tour.

*Groans* The stupid is spreading, like a gigantic tidal wave.

By Caine, Fleur du mal (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

Anyone within 50 miles of that convention will lose about 20 IQ points.

I will be there.

We are so lucky that they're now broadcasting the Daily Show and Colbert Report on ABC2! This'll be fun to watch. I feel sorry for the reporters that have to suffer through it though.

Palin and Beck?!?!?! Noooooo.....

Don't forget about nearby Steve King of Iowa. We're in danger of forming a supermassive black hole.

Michele Bachman and Sarah Palin are two bright, well-educated women, who despite the misogynistic culture frequently bemoaned on this blog, have achieved great things and high office. I think they've earned the right not to have their meeting described as a "Lesbian Rally," particularly given their utterly principless embrace of biblical attitudes on the matter. :)

By history punk (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

it's obvious to me that all those nutters complaining that the LHC would doom us all were really just trying to distract us from the REAL danger!

Michele Bachman and Sarah Palin are two bright, well-educated women, who despite the misogynistic culture frequently bemoaned on this blog, have achieved great things and high office.

What universe did you come from? Definitely not a rational one. You are as big of a loser as they are in the intelligence department.

By Nerd of Redhead, OM (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

my favorite comment from the linked site:

Palin is now officially the Mr. T. of the GOP car show circuit.

there are immutable law governing the universe that forbid anyone from dividing by zero. I would suspect that having two such meta stupid people in the one town would come very close to doing just that. I imaging the stupid would be so dense it's gravitational pull would drag all the nearby stupid in, eventually it would reach critical mass and go Nova.
Stay in Australia PZ, it's the only way to survive, get the trophy wife on the next plane along with the family and ask for refugee status, once you explain why you want that status you would be a shoo in to be granted a temporary protection visa.

By Atheist Chaplain (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

What universe did you come from?

pretty sure he was tongue in 'whatever' there, Nerd. ;)

We had Palin and Beck out here in Tulsa last weekend. I really wanted to make an ass of myself with some signs, but I had more important things to do.

By crankysaint (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

Chimp's link:

Palin and Beck kick off tour in Tulsa

which is funny enough, but then:

The tour will continue from its kickoff in Tulsa to cities throughout the country. Other conservatives such as Sean Hannity, Karl Rove and Laura Ingrahm will join the tour later on.

Hannity, Rove, Palin, Beck...no distinctions being drawn among political architects, cutout candidates, and radio blowhards.

By Sven DiMilo (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

In the city limits of Minneapolis? Really? There aren't many places where they're less beloved...

On the other hand, noon on a Wednesday, they're banking on most of us not caring enough to take time off work/lunch to mock them.

aaaaiiiiiiieeeeeeeee!

remember when I was talking about a million things that could happen that could prevent me from finishing school again? Well, between Palin, Bachmann, and Beck, the US might become too toxic for me to deal with too quickly.

That and the proximity of Fargo to Minnesota could mean that it could be swallowed up by that black hole, never to be seen again.

By Jadehawk, OM (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

Don't worry Jadehawk. It should be a very small, and very hot, black hole. It'll evaporate away quickly.

By Physicalist (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

Don't worry Jadehawk. It should be a very small, and very hot, black hole. It'll evaporate away quickly.

Yeah, and all else that's left of the Reptilian Party with it.

By David Marjanović (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

Yeah, and all else that's left of the Reptilian Party with it.

I'll believe it when I see it.

By Jadehawk, OM (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

I'll believe it when I see it.

Skeptic!

By Physicalist (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

Physicalist:

Don't worry Jadehawk. It should be a very small, and very hot, black hole. It'll evaporate away quickly.

It better be, because I'm also in ND and waaaaaaaaay too close in regard to fallout.

By Caine, Fleur du mal (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

I fear that we'll all find out what happens when you divide by 0.

*sigh* I'm an evil person. When I read the title of the post you linked to, I had to think of the final scenes of Inglorious Basterds.

I'll go take my violent thoughts somewhere else now.

By Jadehawk, OM (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

You have just insulted every black hole in the universe, sir. I hope you're happy.

Occasionally, something that is very foolish and idiotic gets a grand show, and in the process scares away all who were uncertain or unknowing. And if we're all very, very lucky, this might be enough to prove that criteria.

By HidariMak (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink
I'll believe it when I see it.

Skeptic!

:-D :-D :-D

Night saved!!!

the final scenes of Inglorious Basterds

I demand a link to a video to fill that hole in my classical education.

By David Marjanović (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

It'll be like a 3-dimensional fractal of Batshit.

By alysonmiers (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

Just fill the convention hall with carbon dioxide. After all, according to Representative Bachman carbon dioxide has never been shown to be detrimental to human health. It is just plant food.
Shnoah's Ark

Michele Bachman and Sarah Palin = Dumb & Dumber

I demand a link to a video to fill that hole in my classical education.

Inglourious Basterds aren't what I'd call "classical education", seeing as it's a movie from last year. Plus, the relevant line ("We have all our rotten eggs in one basket") occurs much earlier in the film than the actual scene of dealing with said rotten eggs and the basket. And that one is not a fun scene to watch; just very gratuitously violent and bloody.

By Jadehawk, OM (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

Two women sharing a brain cell.

By Angus McPresley (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

@crankysaint #22

I really wanted to make an ass of myself with some signs, but I had more important things to do.
That's the difference between bat-"crap" insane tea-partiers and the rest of the country. Doing more important things, unfortunately, is not "news"worthy.

Bachman, Palin, Beck, Hannity gaaaack it's the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. The evangalicals are trying to create self fulfilling prophecy about it being the End Times. The black hole of stupid will suck everything in site and as its event horizon spreads logic will start to disappear and there will be a great resurgence in religious fervour fanning the metaphorical flames and adding mass to the singularity. Wars will break out over religious doctrine and people will fly planes into buildings and walk into cafe's and street markets and blow themselves up. The military will be provided with sniper sites inscribed wit Gods word to guide the bullets to the infidel.

Oh hang on, all that bovine excrement is already occurring.

PZ take The Chaplains words to heart and bring your loved ones to Oz. As you have already confirmed the Beer and wine are great and if we keep exporting the Ken Hams we can become the centre of nursery Nebula producing bright stars of reason, compassion and non bullshittyness.

@2: My thoughts exactly.

@37: Who has access to a few metric tons of dry ice?

In the same place and the same time. It will be like an intellectual black hole.

Like, oh, Mississippi, the state created so that Texas would have something to look down on.

OK, recognition is due to Angus.

Zinger of the thread, so far.

By John Morales (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

Heh. Well, those Australian newspapers ('The Australian' for example) sure know how to plumb and trawl the depths of stupid - we're talking 10.5 on the Sarah Palin scale. Some imbecile who wrote a column for the paper doesn't even know what an atheist is - she was writing some garbage about how atheists are so wrong about everything (yeah, that old stuff), but apparently for her an atheist is someone who doesn't believe that RELIGION exists. Maybe she got her definition from the New Moron Dictionary or something.

By MadScientist (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

Oh PZ, you are a cheeky monkey (squid?)! Posting about Palin and Bachman this early in the vulgarity embargo is like waving bacon in front of a dieter on their first day.

By Grendels Dad (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

It will be like an intellectual black hole.

Nice.

By jcmartz.myopenid.com (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

That's so perfect. I'm going to be snickering about it all night (probably in my sleep too).

And now we go to our reporter in the field. "I'm standing here with America's top two vacuum tubes...."

By clockkingfl (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

Come now, the people here are just awfully disrespectful. Without the yin of Sarah Palin and Michelle Bachman, there would be no yang. These two upstanding, strong-but-wrong conservatives that aren't educated or articulate enough to be considered ideologues...they provide a great service. They allow normal people to keep their senses sharp. I mean if a Palin or a Bachman couldn't be defeated in an argument...then there really isn't hope for anyone. Why disrespect these two when they make ideal punching bags? You should thank god every day that these two gifts from heaven came out of nowhere. You should be chomping at the bit and salivating at the thought of making mincemeat out of such simpletons. (That is...simpletons meaning anyone who's like those two.)

Two women. One brainpan.

I am very sorry. I am a sick and evil person

By Janine, Mistre… (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

If there ever was an intention to build FEMA camps, this is the place to start. Just conceal high wire fences beneath the faux floor, and make them snap upright as soon as the herd stands nicely and tidily together.
If this doesn't happen, it's one more piece of evidence (as if we needed that) that teabaggers and other paranoics live a delusion.

By black-wolf72 (not verified) on 16 Mar 2010 #permalink

Isn't the moron a sub-atomic particle ?
If you bring 2 or more morons into close proximity wouldn't that create a stupidularity ?

Will there be a black-out as the two intellectually blown light bulbs meet?

Posted by: Angus McPresley Author Profile Page | March 16, 2010 10:12 PM

Two women sharing a brain cell.

Nah, think that brain cell escaped, but not unscathed, - from under-use and neglect.

Kirsebærtre is ok this week?

I'm sorry, I can't find a way to ridicule this better than others have done in this thread.

This GOP trainwreck with Palin, Bachmann, Beck, Limbaugh, Hannity as the lead actors ressembles more and more a tragicomedy in the theatre of the absurd and I think I'm stuck on the more tragic elements :-(

By negentropyeater (not verified) on 17 Mar 2010 #permalink

Where's one of those death panels when you really really need one?

By https://www.go… (not verified) on 17 Mar 2010 #permalink

I'm surprised they haven't added Carrie Prejean into the mix for the trifecta of stupid.

Unfortunately, I cannot but overhear some repugnican guys in close proximity here at work. They don't look at Bachmman and Palin as leaders. They don't really care what they think. They look at them for pure titillation, in every sense of that word. Fake values doesn't interest them as much as perky or fake titillators.

By bbgunn071679 (not verified) on 17 Mar 2010 #permalink

Unfortunately, because of the banning of all the choicest words during Euphemism Week, I cannot post on this topic at all.

By Heaventree (not verified) on 17 Mar 2010 #permalink

In Chicago, one radio station is advertising An Evening With Sarah Palin. Nudge. Nudge. Wink. Wink.

Why would she come to Chicago, er, Rosemont. I thought that real americans came from small towns.

By Janine, Mistre… (not verified) on 17 Mar 2010 #permalink

Michele Bachman and Sarah Palin

So, have the two of them decided which one's going to be on top?

.

.

Of the ticket, I mean!
(Dirty minds...)

“It isn’t that some gay will get some rights. It’s that everyone else in our state will lose rights. For instance, parents will lose the right to protect and direct the upbringing of their children. Because our K-12 public school system, of which ninety per cent of all youth are in the public school system, they will be required to learn that homosexuality is normal, equal and perhaps you should try it. And that will occur immediately, that all schools will begin teaching homosexuality.”

"The America I know and love is not one in which my parents or my baby with Down Syndrome will have to stand in front of Obama's 'death panel' so his bureaucrats can decide, based on a subjective judgment of their 'level of productivity in society,' whether they are worthy of health care. Such a system is downright evil."

Poisonous, vulgar stupidity.

This is a dry run for the Thugs new tactic, Teh Mooron Bombo. It forcefully repels all people who can thinkbreathe, leaving only those that even the zombies wouldn't touch. Who have the vote…

"The America I know and love is not one in which my parents or my baby with Down Syndrome will have to stand in front of Obama's 'death panel' so his bureaucrats can decide, based on a subjective judgment of their 'level of productivity in society,' whether they are worthy of health care. Such a system is downright evil."

I agree, such a system is evil. Good thing no one is proposing such a system. What a truck load of dishonest bat guano crazy.

Because our K-12 public school system, of which ninety per cent of all youth are in the public school system, they will be required to learn that homosexuality is normal, equal and perhaps you should try it. And that will occur immediately, that all schools will begin teaching homosexuality.

Ugh. This kind of fear-mongering is more pervasively harmful, even outside hardcore religious families, than people realise. Schools should teach about homosexuality, and I'll explain why, by means of a personal anecdote and a confession.

I had a relatively liberal Christian upbringing, and went to state schools. But as a young child, I was never really told anything at all about homosexuality, whether at home or in school. The topic was simply never mentioned. Until I was eleven or twelve, I honestly couldn't have told you what homosexuality was. Kids used to call one another "gay" as an insult, but for a long time I had no idea that the word had an actual meaning. (Even after I found out, I continued to believe lots of bizarre urban myths, about homosexuality and sex in general, which circulated among kids in school.)

Accordingly, when I found out about homosexuality and same-sex relationships, I initially found it freaky and uncomfortable; it just didn't chime with my culturally-absorbed (heteronormative) view of how relationships were supposed to work. Combining this with the growing (though rather superficial) Christian belief I held at the time, and the desire to displace my own adequacy and self-esteem issues, I became a raging homophobe in my early teens. (I'm ashamed to admit this now, but I have to tell the truth.) I gradually became more open-minded as I grew up, but I didn't really lose the last vestiges of bigotry until I started at university, met actual gay people, and realised that my prejudice had been completely irrational. I'm now deeply ashamed of how I used to think.

I have since de-converted from Christianity, and am now a very strong supporter of gay rights and same-sex marriage. I've also realised that my own orientation isn't as clear-cut as I once thought. But I would have come to terms with all these issues a lot earlier, if I had been educated in school about the existence of homosexuality. I'm not suggesting that schools should teach a particular set of "values", or that they should mandate tolerance or acceptance. But they should dispel myths, and they should teach children that the heteronormative "traditional family" is not the only kind that exists.

My long-ago behaviour has been weighing on my conscience for a while; and I hope that the gay, lesbian and transgender people reading this won't bear any ill-will towards me for the bigoted views I held as a 14- or 15-year-old. I'm older and wiser now, I strongly support gay rights and speak out regularly in favour of same-sex marriage, and I have the rest of my life (however long or short that proves to be) to continue doing so. I hope that's sufficient to put right what I did wrong.

Inglourious Basterds aren't what I'd call "classical education", seeing as it's a movie from last year.

Thought so, but Star Trek XI most certainly is classical education, and… :-)

Thanks for the information anyway.

I hope that's sufficient to put right what I did wrong.

Dude, at that age, how much opportunity to do any damage did you even have?

By David Marjanović (not verified) on 17 Mar 2010 #permalink

I hope Chris Matthews and Rachel Maddow tear into these two voids of intelligence tonight.

Bimbos. If it were guys, I'd call the dumb jocks.

By stevieinthecit… (not verified) on 17 Mar 2010 #permalink

Oh good. The (can I say that? No. Um...) twit is coming to my racist Michigan berg. No, really. About 10 years ago, the local school district added MLK Day to the holiday list because a black basketball player transfered into the district. Then, when he graduated, they took it OFF the holiday list for a few years.

By randydudek (not verified) on 17 Mar 2010 #permalink

If there was a black hole and all the republicans fell in, there would be no problem. The democrats wuld just continue to push their policies.

We in Ann Arbor, MI will have our own chance for brain melt because O'Same will bu speaking at UM's graduation.

By teammarty (not verified) on 17 Mar 2010 #permalink

With all the recent stupidity emanating from the TSBOE (local measurements show temperatures around 454 degrees farenheit), it gives me great schadenfreude to hear about this event.

Intellectual black hole is an understatement. It would suck the brain right out of your freakin' head!

If there was a black hole and all the republicans fell in, there would be no problem.

Since you're the first person even to mention Republicans, I don't know what the hell you're talking about, or why you bring it up. Palin and Bachman are being bashed for being morons. Whether that has anything to do with them also being Republicans is left as an exercise for the reader.

The democrats wuld just continue to push their policies.

We in Ann Arbor, MI will have our own chance for brain melt because O'Same will bu speaking at UM's graduation.

Your Tu Quoque is showing...

That would be dumbest and dumbester...

Michele Bachman and Sarah Palin = Dumb & Dumber

This verse from the Muse song "Supermassive Black Hole" is terrifyingly appropriate:

I thought I was a fool for no one
But ooh, baby I'm a fool for you
You're the queen of the superficial
And how long before you tell the truth?

This song is clearly prophecy.

And, of course, Dumb and Dumber are kicking off their tour in my hometown. Of course. Oooooklahoma, where the wind goes sweeping away the brains.