Summer at ACME College

"Ahhhh... summer at last. No more classes. No more committee meetings. Do you realize what this means?"

"Ummmmm.... no. What does it mean? What are we going to do this summer, Brain?"

"The same thing we do every summer.... Try to do PUBLISHABLE RESEARCH!!!"

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"Are you pondering what I'm pondering?"

"I think so, Brain, but diffusion pump oil is all stinky and viscous, and won't the chickens get upset?"

"You are the very quantum of imbecility, Pinky."

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"The first step in our plan is to use a grating-locked diode laser to-- yes, Pinky?"

"Um, Brain?"

"Professor Brain."

"Um, right, Professor Brain. NARF! Um, don't we need to have a diode-locked grating laser first?"

"Grating-locked diode laser. We do have one, Pinky, we built it last summer. It's right here."

"But does it, um work?"

"Of course it works! I built it myself-- it's solid as a rock."

{FX: Thumps fist on table.}

{FX: Horrible crashing noises.}

"Come here, Pinky, I shall have to hurt you."

"Why, Professor Brain? Will that help fix the laser?"

{FX: THWACK!!!!}

"No, but it will make me feel better..."

{weakly} "... narf!..."

"Now, as I was saying, the first step is to rebuild our grating-locked diode laser..."

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"Um, hey professor, my laser is-- who were you talking to?"

"What? Nobody. There's nobody here."

"But I thought I heard voices...."

"Probably just the music. What's up?"

"Well, my laser is doing something funny, and I was wondering if you could take a look at it..."

"Sure thing. Poit!"

"Um, what?"

"Nothing. Let's go see what's up with your laser..."

{Fade out, as the theme song plays...}