Football: That Was Quick

I don't normally pay much attention to preseason or off-season sports, and my isolation has been better than usual this year with regard to the NFL, what with being in Japan for the past three weeks. As a result, I vaguely expected my Giants to suck this year, but I was not prepared for the season to be effectively over after one game.

Hyperbole, you say? Maybe, but it's not just about the loss to the hated Cowboys, or even the injuries to key players, it's about the way they lost, and the players they have left.

Consider: what were their weaknesses last year? Well, their big problem was a pass defense with the porosity of aerogel. What did they trot out last night? The same players in the same positions, in the same schemes. The Cowboys had basically one play that they ran about ten times, for big gains every time-- that little slant route over the middle. It didn't really matter who they put on that route-- Terrell Owens, Jason Witten, Sam freakin' Hurd-- they were completely open every time.

What's their other big defensive weakness been? Well, depth on the defensive line has been a big problem. Michael Strahan hasn't played a full season since about 2002, and he wasn't even in camp for most of this year. What happened last night? Osi Umenyiora went down in the second quarter, and an out-of-shape Strahan wound up having to play the entire game, because they apparently don't have anybody else at that position.

I'm ready to write this season off as a dead loss not because of any specific plays or players, but because there's no sign of any change in the basic pattern that has led them to collapse the last few years. Or even a hint of recognition that there is a pattern here. It's the same goddamn things going wrong in the same goddamn way, and Tom Coughlin stands there with the same look of blank incredulity on his face, as if he had never seen it before.

On the bright side, Eli Manning and the offense looked pretty good. Of course, Manning banged up his shoulder, and Jared Lorenzen, their backup QB who's the size of a defensive lineman, went into a slide two yards short of the line on fourth down, down ten with two and a half minutes left.

Oh, well. At least this will free up some of the mental energy I usually use for caring about football to put toward other things...

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"Tom Coughlin stands there with the same look of blank incredulity on his face, as if he had never seen it before."

It's not really blank incredulity. It's more uncomprehending confusion. It's like a cat's expression when he has been looking out the window and a big bird just swoops by out of nowhere. He really needs a big tattoo on his forehead that is just big block letters: "ZOMFG!! WTF!?"

By PhysioProf (not verified) on 10 Sep 2007 #permalink