Shorter Matthew DeBord: If GM stops making the Hummer, the French will win WWII.
Honestly:
…it would be a mistake for GM … to sell the brand to an upstart carmaker in India or China or to breed it as a hybrid, as some have suggested. GM desperately needs an obnoxious, attention-grabbing brand to keep from turning into a dreary shadow of its former self. And America needs the Hummer to remind us of what has always made our automobiles stand out, from the tailfin 1950s to the muscle car 1960s and '70s: swagger.
Also poor maintenance records, low fuel economy, and declining profits.
Americans don't just drive their cars -- they proclaim something about themselves by driving them.
For instance, DeBord clearly cares more about corporate jingoism than quality, long term costs in fuel and maintenance, or apparently the fiscal viability of General Motors.
It takes a certain kind of man -- it's almost always the owner of a Y chromosome -- to take a gander at the Hummer, in all its broad, burly, paramilitary gas-guzzling glory, and see himself behind the wheel, striking fear and loathing in the hearts of ecologically sensitive motorists. … Every once in while, you see a little guy clambering out of a Hummer, painfully in need of a ladder, and you realize that it can also be viewed as a $57,000 ticket to enlarged self-esteem.
And lest you think that this abbreviation doesn't do justice to the other examples of Hummer owners on offer – Sylvester Stallone and the Governator – consider the fact that years of steroid abuse have surely shriveled their genitalia like raisins. People who really care about self-esteem don't think it's measured as the inverse of fuel economy.
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Hmm, that article reads like satire to me. Not very good satire, I'll grant you, but an attempt nonetheless.
This is almost certainly true. For instance, driving a Hummer says; "I am a jerk, and I never think about anyone but myself unless forced to by circumstances"
My 18-year-old Honda Civic says; "Not really all that concerned what someone else thinks, and has better things to spend money on than gasoline". I guess. Or maybe it says; "Wimp", depending who's listening.
I got picked up for a date by a guy in a Hummer once. I knew it would be a failure as soon as I saw the car. And I will NOT repeat on a public blog what he proceeded to tell me about his genetalia. The only redeeming moment of that date was when he had to use his turn signal - it clicked like the Trouble pop-o-matic bubble and I giggled to no end which pissed him off. Deflated all the manliness out of that car.
I will laud the day GM gets rid of that car. What a waste.
To me that line is a ten foot tall sign that this article is deliberate satire. Why else would he deliberately imply that men drove Hummers because they were deficient in self-esteem?
"Why else would he deliberately imply that men drove Hummers because they were deficient in self-esteem? "
Perhaps he really thinks our national self-esteem is in the dumps.
This article is very interesting.Self-esteem is important because feeling good about ourself can affect how we act. the good things we do and the positive aspects of our life, we can change how we feel about ourself.
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reena
If I had the money, I'd get the biggest, ugliest Hummer, re-engineer it to run on waste biofuel (think McDonalds worn-out grease, not corn-that-coulda-fed-the-starving-orphens) and rev my engine at all the boys looking for better self esteem.
Then it would not be a $57,000 ticket to self esteem- but a $57,000+ ticket to smugness. Way more fun than the $22,000 ticket to smugness I'm more likely to get (Prius).
I tried to read Matthew DeBord as if it was being spoken by Stephen Colbert.
GM is already a shadow of its former self, and has been since the mid 70's. The turbo Solstice is pretty sweet, however it (and the 'Vette, I guess) don't make up for the blah that continues to permeate the line. It's better blah than it was a decade ago, at least. They're a step up from Ford ("Hey! We make the Mustang!") and Chrysler ("We still make cars! Seriously!").
Still, I think I'll keep my 19 year old Toyota.