If the Manhattan Project worked like my college group projects do.

As someone who teaches the occasional university undergrad course, this is more real than you might think. Here an excerpt:

TELLER: Right. So, yeah, we split the plutonium atom I guess. And make a weapon out of it.

BETHE: When is this due anyway?

TELLER: I think tomorrow.

BETHE: What?!?!

TELLER: I know, right? I mean we shouldn't have put it off, but ... still sucks.

BETHE: I have another class with one of the Soviets, and he says theirs isn't due until 1949.

TELLER: 1949?!?!

BETHE: I know, right?

TELLER: I knew we took the wrong section. And no wonder the Russkies were out last night.

Anyway, click here to read "If the Manhattan Project worked like my college group projects do." by Alex Schmidt (from McSweeney's)

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OMG I am STEALING this for my class tomorrow. The LITTLE BEASTIES all of whom are science students, REFUSE to do their f-ing group projects. Apparently their science will take place in some isolated lab a la the artist.