Microsoft Bob Redux

face="Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif">Microsoft
(the company, not the cat) is planning
to introduce a free, href="http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20070801/tc_nm/microsoft_works_dc_1;_ylt=AvNzaQ0YzHMN8HgffxSZzmYE1vAI">adware
version of Microsoft Works.
 Works is their stripped-down version of Microsoft
Office.  Works already
comes bundled with many newly-purchased Windows machines.
 Most people are not aware of paying for it anyway.
 The
version they are planning come conveniently pre-loaded with
advertisements stored on the hard drive.  When the user
connects to the Internet, more ads are downloaded.  



In addition to all the advantages that come from allowing someone you
don't know to place files on your computer, the users also get the
convenience of filling up unused portions of their workspace with
images that distract them from doing something they'd rather not be
doing in the first place.  Additionally, they get to devote
some of their unused bandwidth and CPU cycles to someone else.
 



Perhaps the greatest benefit is that they don't have to be troubled by
the onerous task of clicking their mouse about eight times in order to
download and install a robust, full-featured, free program such as href="http://www.openoffice.org/" rel="tag">OpenOffice.
 Of course, OpenOffice also has the disadvantage of only
displaying the images that the user tells it to display, and it does
not allow strangers to push content onto their machines.
 Plus, it is available in only 78 languages.  



The Microsoft Adware also spares people the trouble of using href="http://www.google.com/google-d-s/tour1.html">Google
Docs & Spreadsheets.  Google has the
burdensome requirement of taking up all of zero megabytes of hard drive
space,
and only being usable when the user is anywhere with Internet access.
 In contrast, Microsoft Works offers users the convenience of
leaving their data behind whenever they stray from the office.
 (Which
they should not be doing, anyway.)



What does Microsoft (the cat) have to say about this?







She's impressed.  So excited she can hardly even wake up.