Priceless artifact for sale!

Have you seen this person's eBay feedback??? Not seen feedback that low in a long time. Appropriate.

Poor fella...but what an astonishing find! This fossil proves human time travel is possible!

I reported it as a fake. I know I should probably try to sell it to all the Christians I know but since I sell on EBay once in a while, I like to keep the site legit. I have to fix my recliner the dogs broke, could you send me about 10 of those nails please?

looks like the ad is not for an actual fossil, but for a subscription to his internet magazine, from which the picture is taken.

Bad, but not a five dollar fake fossil.

Poor fella, indeed -- the bad feedback is because "Casts made outdoors sever rain/wind held up production," and then there were complaints about shipping, so now you have to go pick it up in Riverside -- hey, PZ, you can add it to your itinerary!

I know I should probably try to sell it to all the Christians I know...

Funny. The thought that crossed my mind was gifts for next xmas for my family. My mom would mount it on her wall somewhere I'm sure.

Yeah, I read some of his feedback. Very often, when someone leaves this jerk a negative review, he turns around and accuses them of being an evolutionist. What a weirdo and scam artist.

Using a CT scan....checking "rock"....determining it to be genuine.....**geology region of the brain explodes trying to escape**

Poor fella, indeed...

I was referring to the poor fella that was probably turned into dino-nom....you know, as documented by the fossilized record of the event.

Ah..."Biblical Science News" Is supposedly an online-pub with a Yahoo Group. Here's the link - http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Auldaney/summary Read the summary for more hilarity.

Reported to eBay as fraud.

Sorry for the double post, but why the newsgroup is called, "Auldaney" instead of "Biblical Science (sic) News" I have no idea. Maybe they're trying to throw off the Illuminati (who are also mentioned in the summary).

66.7% ebay rating! You can definitely trust this guy.

Hmmm...it actually seems worth the $5 for the hilarity. Too bad he won't ship them.

Also, I would assume he's selling casts of the "fossil", though its a bit odd that it doesn't specify that anywhere on the page.

#4 is right!

He is NOT selling fossils (or casts of them). He's selling subscriptions to a website! (Hence the "local delivery only" I guess.)

I complained to eBay about the misleading title.

I'm reading his feedback... How amusing, he sells lots of cheap shit!

"no comunication when I complained about broken cast ,long shipping time

*
Reply by dinosaurology (Apr-03-07 10:50):
Lied about broken in shipment. Refused refund. Deliberate evolutionist attack. "

Reading some of the negative comments on his ebay account, it's really funny how every time there's a complaint about quality, ship time or broken product, he makes claims like

They wanted to keep them & get refund! New tactic by militant evolutionists.

Selling it as a fossil is probably not a good idea. Which gave me the idea of selling fossil replicas. I can easily have 40 fossil replicas of a talking snake (larynx structures clearly visible!)(yes, I know it's soft tissue, but that's why it's so amazing!) ready to go within a week! Cha-ching!!

I decided to complain to ebay as well. That's not an appropriate title at all.

I bought twelve of these.

Of course as a militant evolutionist I only bought twelve, I could have bought a hundred. I could have also gone around to his house, washed his car and given him an anal bleaching for free, but I'm a militant evolutionist (remember?) and we're all bastards.

{sigh}

Why is it morons always cry conspiracy and oppression when their inefficiency and whackakdoodlery is exposed?

Louis

#15 & #4
While that page does make it look like he's selling the subscription to his online magazine, the comments on his account make it sound like at leased in the past he's sold casts. Read the comments, many are about how slow shipping was (months it seems for some), how poorly painted that cast is and about how many casts broke in shipping. He turns around and calls them liars, frauds and militant evolutionists

MASSIVE lulz at the guy's feedback on ebay. As if we needed another reason to think this was a load of crap.

they've actually done a CAT scan of the rock to show that it is genuine

Yep, it's a genuwhine rock, all right. CAT scan shows rockicity all the way through.

From the E-Bay site:

Professor Auldaney has published 9 technical papers on research. Five of them as Senior Paleontologist for the Creation Research Society's project on human tracks found with the tracks of dinosaurs near Tuba City, Arizona....

Gee, Senior Paleontologist sounds sooo professional, until you add.....for the Creation Research Society. Then, you laugh.

From one oif his fossil cast he's selling:

Archaeopteryx is no longer considered to be a missing link between reptiles and birds. All missing links are still missing! The very idea that missing links actually exist is pure speculation

Duh all "missing links" are are missing. That's what the adjective "missing" means.

@lLouis ha ha

Gee, Senior Paleontologist sounds sooo professional, until you add.....for the Creation Research Society. Then, you laugh.

Yep, and rolling on the floor in tears belly laugh.

@lose_the_woo #2

A time travel explanation is still better than the YEC crap.

@lose_the_woo #18

I can easily have 40 fossil replicas of a talking snake (larynx structures clearly visible!)(yes, I know it's soft tissue, but that's why it's so amazing!) ready to go within a week! Cha-ching!!

Hey, they'd only be about 10,000 years old, so it could happen!

tell me it's a joke

You can buy lots of awesome stuff just like this at the Creation Evidence Museum in Glen Rose Texas. I bought a human finger that was lodged in the fossilized remains of a dinosaur. It has a finger nail and everything.

PZ YOU BASTARD! I saw that and freaked lol. My head hurt for the entire time it took for me to think about it. Admittedly a few seconds but DONT DO THAT TO ME.

Heh. He has his own stunningly designed website. (You can "Look up "Auldaney" on your Internet Search Engine. Like Yahoo.com")

He doesn't mention where he got his degree, or even if he has a degree. His eBay listing states he is "Professor" Auldaney, but there's no indication of which, if any, institute of higher learning he's on staff. About the closest thing to a professional organization he lists in his bio is the Southern California Paleontological Society, which looks like a society of amateurs/enthusiasts and only requires an $18.50 membership fee.

That seller's items may be biblical, but his shipping is geological in comparison. Check out all the complaints of slow delivery. Worst feedback rating I've ever seen on eBay - 66.7%

I've communicated with that seller before. I once asked him about the creationist biased description of his archeopteryx replicas. He insisted his 'expert' had checked all the facts.

My expert says he's a mental defective.

WTF?!?

They sell the SAME footprint thing 10 times ?!?

If creationists are going to sell fake fossils such as one of a dog skeleton with a dinosaur claw stuck in it, then atheists must be free to sell Xian relics.

Could be quite a lot. Pieces of the true cross, Holy Grails, Shrouds of Turin's, Jesus foreskins, chunks of rock from the empty tomb and so forth.

Plus more mundane items, Jesus's coffee cup, stuffed toys, drinking glass, silverware, walking stick, and so on.

Then there would be the Solomon, David, Moses, Abraham, Adam and Eve, Noah, Abel, Cain, and assorted other prophets line.

Ebay might be a little perturbed about it. OTOH, how would selling real fake Xian relics differ from anything the Catholic church or the various modern fundie churches have been doing since the year 1 CE? And how can anyone call them fake when it is questionable whether some of those people ever existed anyway?

From Biblical Science News:

We are looking for new writers. Send us your manuscript by e-mail with photos. We pay $15 a page upon acceptance.

Fifteen bucks a page?! Cha Ching!!

Looks like we may have solved our little short-term financial crisis. We'll just have to come up with some convincing biblical "evidence" like... casts of footprints found at the bottom of the Red Sea, proving that the Exodus really happened.

I'll pay $5.01 for fossil (no younger than 1376 BC) with old testament text that has a dinosaur print over it. (text must be leviticus or earlier)

(no higher than $5.19)

@38 - $7.81 for a dinosaur turd on it...

Using Google I found this bone head. He is about six miles from me. Maybe I'll check his stuff out. Or not.

Nate

I don't know whats with the link at 40. I'm blaming it on scienceblogs. Here is the URL: http://www.auldaney.com/Home1.html

That's nothing....

Not only did Humans and Dinosaurs live together, Sony was there with the walkman...

http://blog.makezine.com/archive/2009/12/fossil_tech.html

I always do a little face-palm when I see stupid shit like this out of a town where I went to college...

@ Citizen Z (#33)

"(You can "Look up "Auldaney" on your Internet Search Engine. Like Yahoo.com")"

I wondered why he said this instead of just linking to the papers directly, so I did as he suggested and looked up Auldaney on Google: all I got was sites that repeat the claim that he has published nine papers, but still no links to the actual papers or even indications as to what they are about and where they were published.

Is he just hoping that if he repeats the claim often enough, we'll believe him without seeing any evidence? Who would do that? Oh, wait...

Artifact schmartifact, I've got the One True Pipe™ of J.R. Bob Dobbs (may peas be upon him), now that's priceless.

Ostrich?

No, of course not--it's obviously a dinosaur in pursuit of a god-fearing (and big scary lizard fearing) chosen one--if that poor scmuck would just drop his tortilla-with-image-of-the-virgin-mary on the ground, he just might distract that creature of the lord long enough to get away & live to practice domain over all god's creatures another day.

Am wondering, too, if Ham has ordered any of these ancient artifacts for his creationist museum? Seems like it'd be a big hit there.

This is hilarious. On his listing for an archeopteryx cast (which is a modern bird with teeth, bony tail, and claws, like other modern bird fossils) he talks about EVILutionists creating fake "missing link" feathered dinosaur fossils as a dark stain on paleontology. Lies to make money for EVILution. He says this not two listings away from his human/trex footprint... that fake fossils are wrong.
Thou shalt not bear false witness, unless it is for jesus.

I recognize the dino track! It's was made by a Bullshitasaurs, a fine example I might add.

Hell, *I* recognize that dino track!

It's the same one as posted here two years ago:

  http://scienceblogs.com/pharyngula/2008/07/transparent_fakery.php

What's the relationship between this Auldaney character, and Alvis Delk and Carl Baugh (Humbug!!)?

Wouldn't it be funny if this is a "cast" of the first one, so Auldaney is selling casts of the casts?

Devolution in action!

Auldaney misses the boat again. The print is real, but it's not human or even human-like: it is a dinosaur with little tiny human-like feet. All of his dinosaur friends make fun of him.

Don't any of you read the bible. Dinosaurs are in there and the Good Book is never wrong or they would not call it "the Good Book".

The mention is in John 12:14.
"And Jesus, when he had found a young ass, sat thereon; as it is written,"

Of course at the time, the word dinosaur hadn't been invented, so they used the word "ass." If they had meant donkey, they would have used the word "donkey". Jesus rode a dinosaur, and He even fought on too.

You know, the more I read about this kind of stuff going on, and the more that I read about the behavior of Creationists everywhere who swallow it up, the more I am tempted to try to find a way to milk them for every penny that they have while still somehow (and this is the impossible part, i know) keeping to my morals as an Atheist and Humanist....

...there must be a way. It's just not fair that these people spend their money on other idiots and not me.

Surely that's just Barney's footprint?

Pareidolius @45,

Sshhh! The Pinks are out there, and they're searching for the One True Pipe like Sauron missing his ring.

Not only have they confirmed it with a CAT scan, they also confirmed it with an MRI. The pap smear's still inconclusive.

Prof Myers, you've got the nails and I've got most of the wood from the cross I found in my back yard. Maybe we should collaborate.

The nutter's complete LinkedIn listing is:

Jeremy AuldaneyOwner, Dinosaurology and Writing and Editing SpecialistLocation: Greater Los Angeles AreaIndustry: Writing and EditingCurrent: Owner at DinosaurologyEducation: California State University-FullertonConnections: 2 connections

Doesn't claim to be professor, doesn't mention his degree (or if he even graduated), doesn't mention education or palaeontology, and suggests that selling badly made casts of poorly-executed fakes (and other gimmicks) is his only business.

Anybody who visits Lourdes or the Vatican will notice that so many religiots seem to have a predilection for cheap-crap-fake figurines and souvenirs.

#51:

The mention is in John 12:14.
"And Jesus, when he had found a young ass, sat thereon; as it is written,"

I think the most that can be said about this is that, unlike many of his followers, Jesus could find his own ass.

The mention is in John 12:14. "And Jesus, when he had found a young ass, sat thereon; as it is written,"

I think the most that can be said about this is that, unlike many of his followers, Jesus could find his own ass.

No, as quoted it says "a young ass". It could be his own, but I'm tempered to read it as an early example of one of xianism's fundamental purposes: Buggering children.

The fifth (and last) page in a rant about evolutionists. It's really pure win:

http://www.auldaney.com/T-rexp5.html

Summer Seale @ 52

I have had thoughts along the same lines. Maybe donating all profits to humanist organizations/charities which rehabilitate brainwashed fundies and creationists? If one doesnt exist then strt one up.

Hey, he doesn't consider all Evilutionists to be rotten to the core: Peter Lason is "extraordinarily excellent" (p3)! Shame he wasn't considered for the First Annual Montgomery Burns Award for Outstanding Achievement in the Field of Excellence...

co #61

Why is it that nuts always make their websites as unpleasant to read as possible. I'm not talking about what they write, I'm thinking of Auldaney's use of white letters on a bright blue background.

The "Peter Lason" he refers to seems to be "Peter Larson". Slightly outdated, but I'd never heard of this guy before: http://whyfiles.org/029dinos/sue3.html

This is Brilliant! I'm going to start making these. Or even better, making a kit for other people to make them. that way I save on shipping and water and stuff.

I think this may actually be worse than sending someone a live bobcat.

Love the e-bay feedback:

-Gaudy and amaturishly painted 2 mths to arrive, communication awful, bad seller!
-Took 2 months. Cast is poor - looks like plastic with rouge. Seller was pain.
-looks like made in gradeschool.dont buy.shiped after 2 months

@ 59,

I think the most that can be said about this is that, unlike many of his followers, Jesus could find his own ass.

Which could make him a useful associate in a nightclub late on Saturday night.

Why would there even be a human footprint? I thought they used saddles and rode on the dinosaurs' backs.

Hmm... Maybe this Dino was being taken to the stables?

I had fun doing a little expansion on this fraud.

A sawbuck seems reasonable for the capturing the Missing Link between Bambi and Godzilla

Somebody should make a more realistic looking fossil and 'sell like this' except when people order it, they can report all kinds of negative comments when they receive it. That would be because you added a disclaimer and a how to guide on how was carefully sculpted and crafted to make a fake look real. I think that would be funny.

I'm just about ready to call Poe on this wackaloon. In answer to a question about whether the listing is for the fossil or a magazine subscription, he responds thusly:

Of course the fossil is worth an inestinamatable amount. This is for a research group that does research on this and many other subjects. We prove evolution is noncensence.

I automatically corrected those words in my mind the first time I saw them and missed how fantastically screwed up they were, when I went back and tried to pronounce them I realized what a masterful job he'd done on them.

And yet he takes the writer of a later question to task for misspelling real and fossil, but apparently missed that the same person also misspelled dinosaur as "dinosore" and couldn't even get footprint right.

This just has to be intentional, doesn't it?

Don't answer that, I've been following this sort of thing for long enough to know better.

"Biblical Science?"
Quite the oxymoron.
That's right up there with "Military Intelligence", "Original Copy", and "Compassionate Conservative."

That reminds me of a display I saw many years ago at the Laguna Beach art festival - 'Genuine Artificial Jade'

A simple warning for those who are planing on reporting the ebay item title as "misleading":

The item is under the catagory "publications," and therefore, one should asume that they're not selling an actual fossil or even a cast of one.

Granted, the text is rather confusing, and I wouldn't trust that guy further than I could throw him.