Ask the Internet

Just hand out your number to everyone online who asks for it. You'll be sure to have it ringing enough to never lose it again.

I already tried calling it, but I generally leave it in "Manner Mode" so it doesn't make enough noise to be heard.

Does the dog look perturbed when you call the phone?

It's in the pants currently soaking in the washing machine, of course.

You know how hard that was to arrange from 500 miles away?

In the left-bottom drawer in the fridge, next to the grape tomatoes.

Oh, sorry, that's where the celery is. My bad.

My guess is that you wore a coat or heavier shirt yesterday and left the phone in its pocket. I do that every spring and fall, when the temps are all over the place.

Just to clarify, I don't have it, so you can strike me off the list. Only a few billion more to go.

Between the couch cushions

In a box, with Schroedinger's cat.

another alien abduction!

Right where you left it, of course!

You will find it in the last place you look for it.

It's in the car, between the seat and the door.

/* mounts pulpit; turns to face congregation */

Where's my cell phone?, indeed. When you stop to think about it, isn't that the question we're all asking? For some it is the Cell Phone of Independence, the freedom to travel without fear; for others, it is the Cell Phone of Community, be it business, friends, family, school, or church. For still others, it is the Cell Phone of Intimacy, allowing constant closeness to those most dear even while grocery shopping, driving down the highway, or enjoying a play or motion picture. On this St. Nokia's Day, it is my fervent prayer that each of you finds your cell phone, whatever it may be, in the bosom of Our Lord Jesus Christ.

I don't know its location, but I do know its velocity.

Doesn't help much, I know.

Sorry, I was hungry!

{wind chimes}
Look for the call, not the phone.
{wailing}

This is actually one of the times where a conversation with your dog is likely to be the best method of gathering information

If you're at home, it's at work, else it's at home.

...
I recently ...'misplaced' the family camera. Why did I not think to ask the world wide web where it had gone..?!?

By the way, found it stuffed under the front seat of the family's second car. Silly me.

...tom...
.

It's on Sol-3.
GPS tracking, which proly won't help. If you're that desperate and properly skilled you may wish to search the Maker sites for a signal tracker thingie. If the batteries are still charged you could pick up the 'I'm On/Here I am' signal like using a dowsing rod...the techie kind that actually works. ;)

I have it.
I'll call you now to arrange a ransom.
....
....
Oh, %^%£^

This seems somewhat amusing in this context.

Ha! You think you did it... You think you found something the internet cannot answer.

Well, my answer is 100% certain and correct: Your phone is in the U.S.A.