I know I've typed out some howlers in my day, so I say this with all due humility. But this post over at iO9 had me rolling on the floor last night:
Paul Murtaugh, a statistician at Corvallis' Oregon State University, claims that our carbon legacy isn't just limited to our own emissions, but 50% of our children's (The other parent gets the other 50%). And 25% of their children's, and so on, and so on. He arrived at this estimate using math:
Murtaugh used UN population projections, which say that after 2050, birth rates in all countries will be 1.85 children per woman, on average. Then he took three emissions futures: rising business-as-usual emissions, constant emissions, and "save-the-planet" levels that fall to half a tonne of CO2 per capita per year by 2100.
Wow - a statistician got an estimate using math. As opposed to what? Postmodern literary theory? Interpretive dance? Pointillism?
And really, could you be any more vague about the statistical methodology he used. . . ? Math?
I am now going to say "I arrived at this conclusion using math" whenever I can possibly do so. That is all.
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Oh, that's going to save me so much time in documentation at work.
So, if 50% of my kids' carbon emissions count against me, and the other 50% count against my wife, then my kids have a 'carbon legacy' of 0?!
Goes to show: just because someone used math, doesn't mean it was used and/or reported correctly.
Math and postmodernliterarytheory are different?
Uh-0h..
As the father of too many teens, methane emissions seem to be the more immediate threat.
Haha, I saw this the other day got to "math" and skipped the rest.
@ Stephanie Z: Hilarious.
Well, it is a science fiction blog with a generally sardonic tone. That's the way I read her use of the term "math" anyway.
Of course, if that's the case, it would have been clearer if she put "math" in quotes. She did close the post by writing, "Suck on that, parents."
Oops. I forgot to close the italics tag!
Yeah - I waited patiently for the punchline, but "Suck on that, parents" did not exactly make me feel like I was reading some elaborate parody, a la Stephen Colbert. (Sadly.)
Woo-hoo! As a childless person, my carbon emissions decline to insignificance against the neverending future emissions caused by all you breeders! Suck on that, parents!
p.s. In fact, I myself have no carbon footprint. Talk to my parents about that.
I think "the man with no carbon footprint" will be the next big superhero. Look, kids! He can drive a Hummer and eat imported produce guilt-free!
I need to get me a No Carbon Footprint Man spandex get-up color-coordinated with my Hummer! And a cape, of course.