Steve at Omnibrain has been discussing a deep-fried turkey and turducken event in the back channels, and that has led some of us to ponder the ramifications of deep-frying a turducken itself. In the spirit of that discussion, I wrote a really dumb poem. I also apologize that it is rife with inside jokes. Any sciblings I left out, sorry, but there are just too damn many of us.
Fried turducken makes me choke
Fried turducken is for the blokes
I do not like it on a log
I do not like it with a sprog
I would not eat it with a carrot
I do not like it with a parrot
You can stuff it wearing socks
You can stuff it 'round the clock
I would not eat it in a pinch
I would not eat it getting lynched
I would not eat it, man, no way
It would likely give me MRSA
Fried turducken will clog our hearts
I would not feed it to old farts
I would not eat turducken since
It's probably stuffed with Insolence
Turducken is the latest flap
To be stuffed with liberal crap
I don't get you turducken goons
Ain't it stuffed with Kansas loons?
I realize that I'm quite defiant
I would not share it with a physics giant (Chad really is 9 feet tall)
I realize some hold turducken dear
They scarf it down with Britney Spears
I would not eat it at SFN
Though I can burn it with Evolgen
I would not stuff it with a grouse
or feed it to Jason Rosenhouse
I would not eat it day or night
I hear it goes well with Miller Lite
Stuffing birds brings me no joy
Does it matter if the birds are girl or boy?
I would not eat it with a cake
I would not eat it with Snowflake
I would not eat it despite your wishes
It's as revolting as Abel's dishes
I do not like it fried, stuffed, and huge
I'll feed it to the chimp refuge
How many birds can be fit into one?
We'll need some math to see it done
I do not like turducken fried,
I do not like it Omni-fied!
Fried turducken has BEEN DENIED!!!!
Had deep fried turkey for Thanksgiving. Is ok. Would not fry turducken. Roast turducken. Fried turducked would not get hot thru before the outside dried up or burned