Family Traditions

Tomorrow, Kate and I will be heading off to Scenic Whitney Point to spend a few days with my family. Part of this will be the traditional Christmas Eve dinner with my father's side of the family (described in more detail below the fold). It occurred to me a little while ago that this is the one real tradition that I've never missed. At least, as far as I know-- it's possible that there was some year when I was an infant that we didn't make it to the Christmas Eve dinner, but as far back as I can remember, I've never missed one. Every year, we've gotten together with that side of the family, first at my grandparents' house, then at my aunt's and uncle's. That's an unbroken run of better than thirty years.

This seems like a good excuse for an Holiday Tradition Open Thread:

What unbreakable family traditions do you have? What events or activities do you do every year without fail? And what's the longest unbroken string of observances for you?

This was inspired by my family's Christmas traditions, but needn't be restricted to Christmas observances. If you don't celebrate Christmas, but have traditions associated with some other holiday, post something in comments.

It's going to be a big group this year for Christmas Eve-- twenty-nine people at last count, ten of them children. I'm not quite sure where they're going to put everybody. And it's going to take forever to get through the pre-dinner rituals. I wouldn't miss it for anything, though.

In a bit more detail: My father's family is Polish, so we do a fairly traditional Polish Chistmas Eve dinner, including the oplatek ritual. The oplatek is an unleavened wafer of basically the same material as a Communion wafer (or cardboard, if you're not Catholic), though it comes in larger rectangles and isn't transubstantiated.

At Christmas Eve dinner, everybody gets a wafer, and exchanges pieces with each other person at the table, going from oldest to youngest. So, back in the day, my Uncle Joe's mother Katie used to go first, and take her wafer to my grandfather. They'd wish each other a Merry Christmas, and he'd break off a piece and eat it. Then she went to my grandmother, then to Joe, and so on. After she'd gotten all the way through the kids (my cousin Andrew being last), my grandfather would take his turn going to Katie, then my grandmother, and so on. this continued all the way through, well, Andrew.

When I was really young, this used to be very solemn, and I remember being absolutely terrified about getting the order wrong. We were also expected to remain quiet and dignified through the entire process, though over the years, that became harder to maintain. Eventually, it started to degenerate into a subtle food fight, with my cousins and I throwing oyster crackers at one another (the first course of dinner is always vegetable soup, and there were crackers on the table for that), and then it became less and less subtle. At most of the weddings of children of my generation, we've thrown oyster crackers at the bride and groom at some point. When Kate and I got married, my Aunt Marie crushed a whole bunch of them in my hair, as revenge for all the crackers ground into her carpets over the years...

A few years ago, it was total bedlam, though it's been a bit quieter the last couple of years. As the crowd expands (with most of my generation being married now, and with kids of their own) it takes longer and longer to get through. We've stuck with having everybody take their turn (and generally pass a wafer for those who are no longer with us), though, and even with the cracker-tossing, it's a lovely tradition.

As far as the meal itself, dinner is meatless in the Catholic sense (fish don't count), in keeping with Polish tradition, though we don't go so far as to serve carp. Actually, the traditional entree has always been fish sticks, and while there was an attempt a few years back to replace that with actual fish, once all the kids were grown, that was roundly denounced, and there's always a plate of fish sticks on the table. We also do pierogi by the ton-- Katie used to spend the whole month of December making dozens and dozens of them, for family and for other members of the church, and these days my Aunt Marie has taken over the operation. I didn't eat them when I was younger, which was my mistake-- these days, Kate usually has to roll me out to the car after dinner. Mmmmmm.... cheese and potato dumplings....

Anyway, that's the traditional family meal, and what we're making the trip down I-88 for. So, what's your favorite family tradition?

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We have other traditions, obviously (my family is Catholic, so there are many obligatory rituals that I respect even though I am "deconverted"), but the cribbage games and movie are definitely the parts of the holiday I look forward to the most.

We will do the oplatek too, though there will probably only be four of us there for the meal. (It's a narrow family tree, usually with a substantial portion out of town.) Still important, though much more brief.

But for culinary joy I'm much more eager for the Christmas morning breakfast of scrambled eggs and kielbasa. Mmmmm.

Hot chocolate and croissants for breakfast on christmas morning.

Started by my mother many years back, I think purely by happenstance as some high-quality ready-to-bake croissants were marked down at Marks & Spencer or something. But it now defines Christmas for me; I think it's been 20 years - more than half my life! - since I didn't do this.

Reminds me of the Skinner pigeons who learned bizarre habits through random reinforcement, now that I think about it! :)

Putting up and taking down the christmas tree. I have my parents old fake tree, and I have helped put it (or it predecessor) up or taken it down for 40+ years. Amazing how that tree, at least 35 years old, has held up. Good plastic and metal I guess :-).