I just spent 2 hours writing a blog post for you that I completely can't post. My husband says it is really not about being a chicken but deciding what battles to fight. And this post would name names and describe how upset I am about something, and, as mentioned, my president reads this blog. So I can't post it. It would be really stupid to post it. I would deeply regret it.
I hope I don't also regret not posting it. Because I would rather have a blogging philosophy like Zuska's.
But, it turns out, today I discover I am a big ol' chicken blogger.
This is why pseudonymous blogging is so important. So stories will be told that those of us who blog under our own names are too chicken to tell.
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You're not chicken, just looking out for yourself! There have been posts that I haven't put up for fear of someone reading it, figuring out it was me, etc....so, I don't think pseudonymous bloggers are totally safe from that feeling either :)
As another non-anonymous blogger, I totally feel for you! I"m still in the earlier stages of chickenhood, where I'm kind of half hoping that more people will read my blog, but half fearing that IMPORTANT people will read it and then judge me for it. Also trying to figure out how to bring up blogging with my potential dissertation advisers to see how they feel about it. So, don't beat yourself up -- you're in a tricky position and need to look out for yourself.
Discretion is the better part of valor. You're not chicken, just wise.
Summary: in a perfect world, you could write about "stuff like this" without fear of consequences. In a perfect world, you wouldn't have anything to write about.
The first rule of field-emergency medicine is "rescuer safety." It gets in the way of stupid heroics. It also means that rescuers don't leave a lot of orphans.
--Avot, 1:14
I understand the feeling as well! On one side, after putting in the effort to articulate a problem, writng the blog post, it would feel unsatisfying in a way (at least to me!) to not be able to post it. But on the other side I hope it was healing/clarifying in some way just to even "get it on paper" even if it can't be published! It is also wonderful that you do have close people in your life who you CAN share it with. When I bring such things to my husband, I'm often surprised by his insight and wished I had shared what was bothering me with him sooner!
I agree - you are definitely not a chicken. It takes a whole lot of guts to blog with your real name... more guts than I have, that's for sure! Hope whatever the post was about gets better soon. Thoughts and hugs to you!
I hope being a chicken blogger doesn't involve being battered, or being valued only for your thighs and breasts...
Out of curiosity, now that it's been a few weeks, what do you think when you look back? Any thoughts on "what if you would have posted"? Was it still a good decision? Is this an excellent example of 'writing a nasty letter, but waiting a day or so to mail it?'